SHe'd almost looked forward to the nonsexual intimacy stage, when he'd thought he'd be able to do it with Asher.
He does his best to hide how miserable he is.
He wishes he had something to drum his fingers on. "I'm fairly sure they aren't having sex, but — I think he thinks Raine doesn't count because she's a girl? He looks at her the same way he used to."
"You can tell her I'm pretty happy? The girls are nice but not as pretty as she is and Ron's a good cook and I get to dance. But also it feels like someone tore away a bit of my heart, and also they put it in ex-gay camp and beat it up and made it want to take showers at night and I think this metaphor is getting away from me a little bit."
Asher is going to have a lot of questions about what exactly she's saying in group, and what she does in free time, and whether she has friends, and so on.
He tells Asher what Raine says in group and that she spends most of her free time in the metal shop or reading or cuddling with Lev and that she hid her thread and needles and doesn't sew anymore and that she has him and Lev and spends time with Andre.
Asher is really unhappy about this.
"Tell her... tell her I'm okay?"
"That you're okay and you're worried about her and you miss her and you love her. I will."
"You and Lev are also invited to my tiny apartment in New York City. When I have one."
"My plan is to get a GED and go to trade school, I have no idea if my parents will help with an apartment or not but Lev is invited to stay with me. I'll — honestly I probably won't tell him, but I'll tell him if it seems like it makes sense to."
"...yeah. I should."
He waits until Ron is already making a trip back to camp.
He goes to bed instead of waking her up. He'll find time to tell her tomorrow.
He doesn't sleep well.
Oh. Good.
He hugs Lev, carefully doesn't bury his face in Lev's hair even though he wants to.
Is he sure about that. Lev is burying his face in Marlo's chest. Lev's hair is right there.