"What did I do to deserve you."

"What did I do to deserve you." 

"No, see, I get to date the really hot, noble paladin type who promises he will keep me safe and take care of me and has really good abs. And you... get to hear plot summaries of fantasy novels you haven't read? I really don't understand what you get out of this relationship at all."

"I get to date someone brilliant and passionate whose entire face lights up when he's happy and I get to hold you and take care of you and learn from you." 

Wow look his face is lighting up.

"I love you." 

"I'm optimistic that if I keep dating you someday I will believe that!"

"I hope so," a kiss on Lev's cheek, "I hope so." 

He considers asking again "why do you like me when I am such a fundamentally inadequate person?" but realizes he will not get a satisfactory answer because Marlo does not, in fact, think he is fundamentally inadequate at all.

Lev snuggles up on Marlo's shoulder.

Meanwhile--

"Marlo and Lev aren't in their beds."

"...maybe they went off to a different bathroom?" Raine says, a little dubious. 

"That would be a really weird thing to do. They might have run away."

"They're the last people here I'd expect it of but I guess with the way they've been looking at each other." 

She curls up with her head on Asher's shoulder. 

"I hope they're okay."

"Yeah." She tucks her face into Asher's neck. "I do too." 

It's so tempting to say "I'd run away with you if you wanted."

Instead he kisses her.

Raine thinks she gets it anyway, though. 

She leans up into him, closes her eyes and lets him lead. 

Back in Ron Parker's house, Lev has progressed to crying quietly on Marlo's shoulder.

Marlo's arms are wrapped around him; he has his face pressed into Lev's hair. 

He feels really really guilty about crying-- he should be happy--

(he's horrible awful sick broken and Marlo doesn't know, doesn't realize, and there's nothing he can say to him to get him to understand--)

Maybe this is why people disapprove of him being gay.

He's 

(broken sick wrong tainted dirty) 

going to deal with that thought when Lev doesn't need a shoulder to cry on, and he's going to keep holding Lev. 

"I'm sick, I'm a failure-- you don't understand, you're perfect--"

"Lev, I'm sick and broken too." 

"How?!"

"Before I came here I had a girlfriend. She's — perfect, she's beautiful and smart and kind and funny, and I thought I loved her because that's what you do with your smart funny beautiful girlfriend, and I never once noticed that I didn't actually like touching her or going on dates with her or kissing her, because I'm broken, and the only reason I have any idea what love feels like is that now I know you."