He makes a soft whimpering sound and holds Lev closer. 

(He shouldn't he shouldn't they shouldn't he shouldn't —)

Lev shivers when he hears the noise.

"Do you like me?" he whispers into Marlo's neck.

"Yes," he whispers. "More than I should." 

"Do you want me?"

"I want you to be happy and safe and I want you to have everything you need and I want you to never feel lonely again and I. Want you." 

Lev kisses him. 

It's soft and gentle and sweet.

Marlo doesn't usually like kissing; he'd tried, with Melissa, but it had always been a thing he did for her, not a thing he did for himself. 

Kissing Lev is completely different. Lev is — warm, and soft, and Marlo doesn't have to think about where to put his hands or how to tilt his head, it just — happens. 

"I love you."

"I love you." 

"What if we-- don't get better?"

He considers it. 

"Would that make you happier?" 

He thinks about it, considers and discards "probably," considers and discards "no, because I'd be a failure."

"Yes."

He kisses Lev again. 

Lev wraps his arms around Marlo's shoulders and his legs around Marlo's stomach and kisses him and kisses him.

Marlo's hands end up in Lev's hair at some point in this process. 

Lev hisses. His hips are rocking back and forth without him really intending them to.

He clings to Lev and — doesn't let his hips rock, but hisses at the friction.

"I think," Lev says, his voice a bit shaky, "we should do empiricism."

He makes a soft interested noise and curls his fingers in Lev's hair. 

"We can't know if we want to get better from being gay actually, because we've never tried being gay. So we should try that. For... five weeks? And then we can come to an informed decision about whether we want to recover from homosexuality." 

He tries to consider the idea on its own merits but — he knows he'll agree either way. It's Lev. 

"We can." 

"The gay lifestyle they described in the testimonials is sort of terrifying."

"...we could ask Sasha if there are other kinds, I bet he'd know." 

"He came here because he was sucking a guy off while wearing makeup. And he's either cheating on that guy now or he wasn't dating him in the first place."

"I didn't say there definitely would be, just that he'd know one way or the other. We don't have to."