It's Sasha's fault for hurting him. He should hurt him back.

"I wish I'd never rescued you from that deathtrap."

He can feel it coming.

Can't do anything about it now. Timeline's set. Locked and loaded.

"And you think I don't have ethics? At least I'm not using one kid and fucking another while wishing I'd left him to die —" 

He wants to say something. He wants to say something that would hurt Sasha as much as he was hurt, to show him how it feels, to make him stop.

He can't think of anything. 

The heart monitor is going beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep. The blood is rushing in his ears. Everything seems kind of far away.

He has a sword in his hand. 

"Might wanna shut your eyes for this part, Cap."

That — 

That is not — 

Sasha takes a step back — 

He's not even thinking when he runs Sasha through.

"— car crash," he gasps, shaky, and then "never — knew me —" and then 

nothing 

more. 

"Sasha?"

He drops the sword. His hands are shaking. He catches Sasha before he reaches the ground and holds him. "Sasha, Sasha, no-- Sasha-- Sasha, you have to keep breathing, you have to be all right--"

He takes off Sasha's mask. Sasha's face is very pretty and very young.

"What the fuck," he says, because there's knowing it was going to happen and then there's knowing it happened, and somehow it seems a lot more real now that it's in front of him. "What the fuck!"

He can run towards them, now. He's free to act now that it won't change anything at all.

He starts to cry. 

He's crying and he's clutching Sasha's body for dear life and he's pressing kisses on his face, his cheeks and eyebrows and nose and lips, and he's whispering over and over, "I love you, I love you, I love you."

He drops down to his knees next to Asher and puts a hand on Asher's shoulder and doesn't say anything. It's not the time, it's not the place, and it wouldn't be his place anyway. 

"I guess," Asher says, and his voice is very small and very quiet, "I guess I'm not the only Asher who's totally opposed to murdering children after all."