A couple of months pass. New Dover is up to a lot of things all at once. Everyone has new lives here, now.
Liane Hunter spends a lot of time thinking about her past, how she got here. She grew up as a snot-nosed tomboy, flying airships, cleaning and doing household chores and running down the streets as a messenger girl. It wasn't a great childhood, but it was... Safe. Nostalgic, thinking about it now. Her parents loved her and all was right in the world. When the Great Frost came, of course she volunteered. She could do no less. It was satisfying, being able to contribute.
And then the betrayal. The elites of London taking all the evacuation transports for themselves. They had been lying about creating enough space for everyone the whole time. Hard but noble work became grim endurance. She was crippled twice, but oh, she made such a difference... Milliways might be the real miracle in the end. Maybe she should have stayed there. (Bah, can't change the past.)
...The second accident was awful. Trapped down a deep crevasse of ice, in constant pain, barely able to move. She couldn't start a fire. She could barely make a little snow hollow to keep in a bit of warmth. She knew in her bones she was going to die in there. That turned out to be wrong in the end, but she still thought about her life a lot. Reminiscing about growing up. She saved a bunch of people. Maybe she's dying, but they're not. She saved little kids, with their eyes full of hope and their minds full of wonder...
After that, she realized she wants a kid. It's not something she can pick apart or reason about, but it's definitely there. But she'd hate marrying and being dependent on someone. Besides, who would want to marry a washed-up twice-cripple? But once she got to Har... The world is full of possibilities. They're not all going to eventually freeze in the cold, there's a whole new world with lots to do and actual magic.
There are single parents here. She didn't even really think about it before - but no, she doesn't actually need to marry someone to have a kid. She doesn't need to find someone who'll tolerate her, and take vows to serve him as a wife...
There's another part to her tail-chasing musing. She knows about sex, vaguely. Sometimes other women talk about it. It sounds like something she wants to try. But unwed sex is a sin, everyone says so. She hasn't done anything more than kissing and naughty wandering hands with Timothy Farlane, a baker's son, for a couple of weeks. She got her airship job right after that and when she got back, he was engaged with someone else. But she liked that feeling, his hands on her...
The church can't be correct in all things. God left them to freeze to death. Maybe it actually was the End Of Days. She doesn't know - she used to listen to priests on this kind of stuff, and now... She just doesn't know.Whatever. She wants a kid. She could hire a doctor to do that for her, she's heard of that being a thing, but that doesn't feel right. It's not how kids are supposed to happen. They're just supposed to happen when you lie with a man, if God or chance or whatever wills it.
...This seems like something she can compromise on. She wants to have sex and see what it's like and turn her imagination into reality, but it's a sin. She wants a baby, but she doesn't want someone else's baby, or to have a doctor magically put one inside her. So. She can have sex with people, and if she gets pregnant, having a kid was meant to be.
The thought is exciting - both halves of it. She finds it hard to stop thinking about it. She can't very well do it with other men from New Dover - well, a few of them probably would have sex without marrying her, but then it'd get back to the town rumor mill and she's still vaguely mortified - on the other hand, who the father is doesn't actually seem that important when she thinks about it. And if she has a kid from a Hari man maybe they'll be more likely to have magic?
She can't make that plan sound bad in her head. She's nervous about it, but... She's never been one to come up with a plan that sounds good and then not do it. She does her level best to become one of the pilots on intercontinental flights. The first few flights she spends a lot of time checking over the airship, studying the job, making sure everything runs smoothly.
Eventually she starts wandering around the cities she finds herself in and wondering who she should, ah, approach for this. (It's a little terrifying to consider!) They don't find it awkward. They don't find it awkward at all. After wandering around for most of an afternoon she sees a few people openly ask each other if they want to have sex, and a couple of people selling it (or who own slaves and are selling them, which is just - ugh, but it would be a Terrible Idea to try and do something about that).
...She still can't bring herself to just. Find an attractive guy and walk up and say 'I want to have sex with you'. It's - it's - mortifying is the right word. Maybe someone she knows from the city after all...? Someone who doesn't hold the church strictures quite so dearly and won't talk about it far and wide? But, no, everyone she can think of that she knows and likes is married, or so young that it would be weird.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah.
...She knows the governor of Ira Sani, Valanda, a little bit. They talked about Hyrule and the other her and Milliways and a few other things during the evacuation. He would probably keep it quiet. And it's not a big deal here, right? And he knows another her, so maybe he'd know the best way to- But how would she- What would she even say to him?
Aaaaaaaah.
Still, that's the thing she can think of that makes her want to crawl into the ground and hide in shame the least.
She flies back to Ira Sani. She gets a couple of days off. She goes to find Valanda and says she wants to talk about something in private when he's not busy.