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Oct 18, 2019 7:39 AM
no, i'm the fucked up housepet
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Z just got off work. Z did not get enough sleep last night. Z's three consecutive energy drinks are really wearing off.

He decides halfway to the subway no way he can get on the train and get off again at the right place and not the end of the line when somebody nudges him awake, so he sits down on the steps in front of the library and leans back against a pillar to try to call a rideshare or something.

He can rest his eyes for just a second before he actually calls the thing, though.

Or...just a minute.

 

Or...

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Zzzz.

 

 

(There is a very tired gothy boy conked out leaning against a pillar in front of the public library, with his phone almost falling out of his hand.)

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Oooooh he's cute. Lookit him. And he looks like the sort of person who might say yes to a Magical Quest.

Kasha calls his girlfriend.

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"It's ten-thirty," she observes when she picks up.

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"I know, I'm sorry, I love you. I found a cute boy and I wanna do the thing. The—that crazy idea you had—the magical quest thing."

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"Do you want to do the thing now or can it wait until morning?"

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"He's really cute."

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There is a long inhale followed by a very audible sigh.

"Fiiiine. Has he seen you, where even are you—?"

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"I found him sleeping on the front steps of a library, it's adorable."

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"Okay. In that case, pick a nice secluded spot nearby to start setting up, make sure he doesn't wake up or get mugged or anything, I will be there in—an amount of time that depends on which library you meant—you've got location sharing turned on, right—yes you do, okay, fifteen minutes. And I love you too."

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He makes kissy noises into the phone, hangs up, and starts circling the vicinity of the library looking for a convenient alley.

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Time passes.

 

 

When the cute boy wakes up, he will find himself in an unfamiliar location, being smiled at by a slightly nervous-looking girl.

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He blinks groggily awake about an hour later.

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–oh, shit, his train–

 

He looks around.

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"Whhhhhat."

Is this...a kidnapping? A prank? Some kind of new, exciting dissociative shit?

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It's sort of dim and foggy - hard to tell where he is exactly. He's still sitting up and leaning back against something, but the surface underneath him is asphalt, and the stone at his back is lumpier than the smooth pillar in front of the library.

"Hi!" says the girl. She looks... not like she practiced this in a mirror, but maybe like she probably should have.

"I promise if you'd rather just leave then you can leave. But I don't think you're going to want to leave."

A light flares behind her, and then a parade of tall white candles comes floating out from behind her back, arcing around until they form a perfect circle around the girl, the boy, and the lumpy rock he's sitting against. The mist still obscures everything beyond this little circle of light.

"The first dangerous secret about magic," says the girl, "is that it exists. Would you like to hear the second?"

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"–uh, yes?"

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"Oh, good, I was hoping you'd say that."

The candles spin gently in their circle.

"The second dangerous secret about magic is that some people can learn it, and you're one of them. Well, 'learn' isn't quite the right word—you have potential, and if you want to unlock that potential, you need to go on a Dangerous Quest." She somehow manages to make the capital letters audible. "People hardly ever die on Dangerous Quests, but they come out traumatized pretty often. As long as you start it and don't quit in the middle, though, you'll come out the other side with your magic potential unlocked and then you can start learning how to use it."

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"Do I need a sword?"

He scrambles up onto his knees.

"I can totally find a sword. I don't know where the fuck you get those but the internet is just full of weird shit you can buy – you probably don't need a sword. Or you'll give me a sword. I have magic potential?"

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—she giggles.

"You do have magic potential. You don't need a sword. All you have to do is accept the quest. It might take a few days, or longer if you're unlucky. If you can't spare the time you can turn me down for now and come back later, but I wouldn't wait too long if I were you. There's a reason I called them dangerous secrets."

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"Well–I accept the quest, then. Bring on the dangerous shit."

If he gets fired for missing work, he's pretty sure he can deal with it, on account of all the MAGIC.

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"–wait, what's the magic like? Like, I'm gonna do it either way, but..."

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"Oh, there's no telling what you're going to get until you get it. It's usually pretty neat, though. Good luck!"

And the line of candles unwinds from its circle and stretches out into a long trail. Mist pulls back from the trail just far enough to let him see his footing, and the way the asphalt transitions into rough grey stone.

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This is really fucking weird.

There is a possibility somebody just drugged him and he’s gonna wake up in a basement somewhere.

...he might as well go on the magical quest in the meantime, though, right?

He gets to his feet.

“Is this just, like...your job? To go around telling people they’re magic?”

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"Something like that," she says mysteriously, and then she steps back into the mist and disappears.

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