Continuities » The Chelish Constitutional Convention » Pamphlet Wars - 4-8 Sarenith Interbellum » A Tale Of Far Off Tien Xia [open]
A Tale Of Far Off Tien Xia [open]
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Vile Scribe
lux
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Simplixia: I am Simplixia, a Foreign Despot, ignorant concerning the ways of Far Avistan.  

Fidutien: I am Fidutien, a dutiful and learned Royal Advisor.

Simplixia: Dutiful and learned advisor, tell me, who is Iomedae?

Fidutien: Goddess of Fighting Evil. 

Simplixia: Marvels of Far Avistan! I Command that a cleric of Iomedae be invited to give a speech. 

Fidutien: I have done as you Command, Wise Ruler. She gave a speech inciting the people to Fight Evil.

Simplixia: Calamity! I did not foresee this! I am wrathful! I Command that she be Buried Alive.

Fidutien: I have done as you Command, Just Ruler. 

Simplixia: Dutiful and learned advisor, tell me, what is Freedom of the Pen?

Fidutien: A law of Anarchic Galt which allows scribes to write Vile Falsehoods along Honest Truth and publish both. 

Simplixia: Marvels of Far Avistan! I Command that scribes be granted Freedom of the Pen in my kingdom. 

Fidutien: I have done as you Command, Wise Ruler. A Vile Scribe now publishes writs inciting Cannibalism and Necromancy. 

Simplixia: Calamity! I did not foresee this! I am wrathful! I Command that he be Buried Alive.

Fidutien: I have done as you Command, Just Ruler. 

Simplixia: Pity me, for I am an ignorant Foreign Despot who visits Calamity upon the lands I rule. Surely, the Wise and Just rulers of Far Avistan do not make these mistakes.

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Good Old Tom
Raimon Queralt
wind-is-rising
Aevylmar
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Yeah, this one's going in the cafe.

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Golarion
Arete/Stars
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Emperadriu: I am Emperadriu, a Wise and Just Foreign Empress, ignorant of the ways of Far Avistan.

Fidutien: I am Fidutien, a dutiful and learned Royal Advisor.

Emperadriu: Dutiful and learned advisor, tell me, who is Iomedae?

Fidutien: Goddess of Fighting Evil, who fought back demons of the Worldwound and struck down Asmodeus with her holy sword.

Emperadriu: Marvels of Far Avistan! I Command that a cleric of Iomedae be invited to our court, to advise us in how we may defeat the scourges of Demon-worship and Diabolism.

Simplicia: I am Simplicia, a cleric of Iomedae! Having been invited here to offer Wise Counsel, I shall instead call for the heads of loyal servants of the Empress and spread Vile Calumnies!

Emperadriu: Calamity! I did not foresee this. I Command that she shall Hang for her spread of Vile Calumnies and agitation for Murder.

Fidutien: I have done as you command, Just Ruler.

Simplicia: Woe is me, for how could I have foreseen that in spreading Vile Calumnies against loyal servants of the Empress I would anger her!

Emperadriu: Dutiful and learned advisor, tell me, what is Freedom of the Pen?

Fidutien: A law of Galt, that land which is joined in union with the foreign kingdom of Cheliax, which allows Virtuous Men to tell us of the Law and Custom of Foreign Lands without fear of Reprisal.

Emperadriu: Marvels of Far Avistan! I Command that Virtuous Scribes be granted Freedom of the Pen in my kingdom.

Amic: I am a Vile Scribe, who inspires Wicked Men to seek out loyal servants of the Empress and tear them limb from limb!

Teixó: I am a Vile Scribe, who inspires Wicked Men to seek out the Necromantic Arts, that they might escape their Just Fate by Vile Rituals!

Emperadriu: Calamity! I did not foresee this. I Command that these men shall Hang for their Abominable Writings.

Fidutien: I have done as you command, Just Ruler.

Amic: Woe is me, for how could I have foreseen that in commanding men to bear arms against the servants of the Empress I would anger her!

Teixó: Woe is me, for my Vile Rituals have not protected me from the Justice of the Empress!

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