Nov 20, 2019 2:07 AM
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"Since it would be hilariously inadvisable for me to join a dueling club whoever's running it I can't provide incentive in the form of promising to show up if it's Flitwick, but I agree with Karen about, uh, everything pertinent."

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"Anyway, aren't you- don't you have tutoring with her? You'll be, you'll spend time with her, you can- spend time with her without involving- getting her involved. Flitwick and then McGonagall, maybe? Just for, just to supervise. You can still have the- the club."

Ari huffs out a sigh. "I'm surrounded by vipers. Fine. But I'm having tea with her alternate Tuesdays and there's nothing you can do to stop me."
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"Enjoy," says Miranda, relieved.

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"What's the tutoring for?"

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"I'm... let's say advanced in practical Defense, and behind in everything else. So while I'm in standard classes for the most part, Miss Jenkins and I are going to be dueling each other once a week or so to keep my hand in. You exercise those muscles or you lose them, you know."

"She's apparently, um, very good at it. She worked w- she worked for Gringott's."

"I am fucking psyched."

"He's excited."

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"Oh, okay. I hope you have as much fun with that as you're expecting."

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"I feel like her style's going to be heavy on precision. Cutting and piercing, maybe? I haven't had any real blood loss in a while, Mum was all blunt force. Unless she does fire or something. I cannot wait for Sunday."

Sally sighs. "Other people, Ari."

"Whoops. Sorry, humans."
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"Aaand there goes all my wistfulness about my theoretical ability to join a dueling club if only if only."

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"Club dueling's just- stingers and Jelly-Legs, and stuff. They don't, um, they don't even let you use Bat-Bogey or Slug Vomiting or that tier. It's all jinxes."

"I think most of what I do technically isn't even pro rules. They're all about the indirect stuff. 'Ooh, I'm going to shoot a bunch of water at him!' 'Ooh, I'm going to turn the water into rats!' 'I'm going to conjure ice under his feet!'" He snorts. "Wimps."
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"You know what could be fun, and moreover done sitting down, would be some sort of game where one person conjuring water and the next person turning it into rats on a field of play neither of them personally occupied was typical of a turn," says Miranda. "But I'm not sure how you'd score it."

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"What you've just described sounds to me kind of like 'what if Quidditch was played without bludgers, or the Snitch, or, you know what, brooms either,'" Ari says, grimacing. "I'm sure the pro leagues would love it."

"You could- you could score it by how effective it would be in a duel proper," Sally suggests. "And quality of transfiguration. Or there could be- there- you could use proxy dummies in place of the duelists, on the field."
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"Ooh, proxy dummies. Mini ones! I'm not trying to spoil your fun, Ari, it's just that it's something of an accomplishment if I spend a normal day of walking around at a sedate pace with zero incidents of tripping and falling."

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He waves a hand. "I'm a violence snob. When I'm fighting I want it to actually happen. Desecrate my game as you will."

"It's like- like disabled Olympics, or something. Minor leagues, even. I wonder if we s- if we could set that up, somehow."
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"I'm all for it! It sounds like good wandwork practice. But we'd need to think more about how to present it for anybody to want to play besides you and me."

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"I'd play, I'm not a violence snob."

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"Maybe I should trawl the Gryffindors. They're classically in favor of violence, right?"

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"At least one, yes. I can introduce you, I feel like you'd get along."

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"Richards? He seemed like the sort who'd like violence, but if kicking people in the face is his usual thing I'm not sure how he feels about wizard violence."

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"I'd say positively. He seemed kind of, um, excited at the idea of swapping people's appendages."

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"Not that I'm opposed to face-kicking. Though I'd probably want someone closer to my own size for that, given that you're all tiny. No offense."

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"We aren't tiny, we are normal-sized eleven-year-olds and you are enormous."

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"I'm technically ten for another week and a half."

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"Also a valid point of view. Still, my brawling with your equally tiny friend seems unsporting somehow. Maybe I'll challenge the Care of Magical Creatures teacher, he'd be interesting. Wonder if he has any technique..."

Sally sighs. "At least one conversation before you t- before you ask him to fight."
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"Yes, otherwise it will just sound like you've taken up monster-hunting in a very impolite way."

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"Yes, yes. I will be unfailingly polite."

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