"Not that I can remember."

"There was an inexplicable glowing blue light emanating from a Hope's Peak-affiliated research facility. I later heard whispers of an anonymous researcher leaking that there was an experiment involving manipulating water molecules using quantum entanglement. Something's up."

"This is why I ultimately decided to attend Hope's Peak Academy. I must know what has become of Makoto Naegi and his associates."

"Do you have any guesses about what might be coming on the 2nd?"

Ah. This must be the ULTIMATE SCHIZOPHRENIC.

(Or, perhaps, the ULTIMATE DETECTIVE, or something along these lines. It's possible they're just leaving out a bunch of information that they think is too obvious to mention. It's not like Edwin can be said to never have done the same thing)

It's not schizophrenia if they're really out to get you.

"Well, presumably we're not going to get mauled by a bear."

"But, in any case, I don't really know as much about Hope's Peak as, it seems, does you. Really, the only information I have is this weird document I found that I... was pretty sure was a joke, but if the Water Bureau is real..."

He pulls out his laptop and opens up hopespeaks.ppt, then turns the screen so his new classmate(?) can see.

The screen flickers.

What to expect from your̻̾̋̌̓ ⱧØ₱ヨ'己 {ēⱥҟ 𝐎⃥⃒̸𝐫⃥⃒̸𝐢⃥⃒̸𝐞⃥⃒̸𝐧⃥⃒̸

...

The laptop's camera turns on, the red light glaringly bright.

Welcome, Hope's Peak freshmenMaxwell! As a former alumni of ⱧØ₱Ɇ'₴ ₱Ɇ₳₭, I'm so very happglad to have this opportunity to assist an [upcoming student] in the onboarding process. If you like p͛⦚u͛⦚z͛⦚z͛⦚=

-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝-̥̊⃝

the resources and opportunities at Hope's Peak Academy will provide ₳₥₱ⱠɆ ₴₮ł₥ɄⱠ₳₮łØ₦ for your extraordinary intellect.

Yeah that seems about right.

The thing is, for almost any other organization, Maxwell stares at news articles and maybe talks to a carefully chosen employee or two if he has to and it's pretty obvious what must be going on behind the scenes. With Hope's Peak... he has some CLUES that sure LOOK connected, and which suggest that it's unusually bizarre, but that's about it.

Will the screen like, change, or anything, if he waits a few seconds or taps at it?

As soon as his eyes reach the end of the message, a cheesy Cube Transition plays.

As the ultimate detective investigator schizophrenic shaman extrapolator mystic high priest you may occasionally experience intuit sense cognize divine decipher visions glimpses connections lights hints which will lead you to truth revelation ideation prophecy ⌌Ⓢ̙⌏⌌Ⓗ̙⌏⌌Ⓐ̙⌏⌌Ⓡ̙⌏⌌Ⓓ̙⌏⌌Ⓢ̙⌏

reach out and grasp and pull at the threads

you may enquire for assistance from our excellent headmaster and my close personal friend, Makoto Naegi

sit tight.

What to expect from your Hope's Peak Orientation

Welcome, Hope's Peak freshmen! As a former alumni of Hope's Peak, I just want to take this opportunity to assist upcoming students in the onboarding process. 

Orientation day starts early, at 9 AM. Plan on attending everything, including the opening speech delivered by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster, Makoto Naegi, the campus tour guided by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi, the question and answer periods led by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi, the guide to campus traditions explained by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi, and the social events facilitated by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi.

Here are a few tips for a successful Hope's Peak Orientation:

- Don't be afraid to ask questions! The knowledgeable Makoto Naegi (who is my close personal friend) will be sure to answer them for you.

- Take care to meet your new professors! My close personal friend, the excellent Makoto Naegi, will introduce you to the faculty. And make sure to talk with your soon-to-be fellow classmates, at the meet-and-greet directed by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi.

- If you're feeling famished, stop by the cafeteria! Hope's Peak Cafeteria serves delicious food every day, prepared and served by our wonderful headmaster Makoto Naegi, who just so happens to be my close personal friend! While we of course encourage you to bring your own water bottles, which you can refill at the many water bottle refill stations around campus (our reliable plumbing was installed after my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi negotiated a deal with a local water supply company, Makoto Naegi Water Bureau), if you forgot, you can purchase one at one of the campus convenience stores, staffed by my close personal friend and our excellent headmaster Makoto Naegi.

- Do not mind the bear. He is, of course, our mascot, and is completely friendly and not at all dangerous.

Well, that's it!

I hope you all have a successful education at Hope's Peak!

- Not Makoto Naegi

"Did you catch any of that."

"Yeah. Rather strange message, isn't it? That's why I dismissed it as probably a joke."

"But what if that's just what they want you to think?"

"I... what would be the purpose of putting out a message that is not a joke, and then disguising it as one? Especially one like that? I suppose it could be like, a coded message of some sort, but then why not just use encryption? Are you saying that it's supposed to be a puzzle of some sort, and it operates on the basis that if you're smart enough to solve it, you're allowed to know its contents?"

"Do you have any particular reason to doubt that Hope's Peak might do such a thing?"

"Most people don't! Although, I suppose maybe everyone does and I'm just not smart enough to figure it out. But that seems unlikely."

"Hope's Peak is obviously an outlier. Regardless, it's not necessarily the case that they're trying to do anything other than mislead us. But still, which deceptions they attempt would contain some information."

"I just assumed that it was made by someone unaffiliated with them?"

"In that case, I would want to deduce the motives and capabilities of whatever unaffiliated party did produce the message."

"Shouldn't be that much. They'd just have to know some basic information about Hope's Peak, like, when orientation takes place, and while they do keep their cards close to their chest it's probably not that difficult to find out. You'd just have to talk to an actual alumni. Or, perhaps, be one."

"The question isn't about what someone would absolutely have to know, in order to avoid putting incorrect facts. That's merely a lower bound... but really, this is just too little data, even for me."