Rights for the right people. That's why they're called "Rights"
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In her GREAT WISDOM Her Majesty has granted us FREEDOM OF THE PEN. That means that ANYONE may write ANYTHING and Her Majesty will FORGIVE THEM.

FREEDOM OF THE PEN is GOOD. It means that people will not be TORTURED for writing that ASMODEUS IS BAD.

ASMODEUS IS BAD. I am using my FREEDOM OF THE PEN when I write that!

But anyone who is reading all the Westcrown Street Papers knows that there are also BAD PEOPLE who write BAD THINGS.

It is OBVIOUS that the Queen has not given us FREEDOM OF THE PEN so that we can write that "ASMODEUS IS GOOD".

I am using  LITTLE LINES like this """""""" to show that I DO NOT MEAN WHAT IS WRITTEN IN THEM. I am just writing about THINGS OTHER PEOPLE ARE WRITING that are BAD.

Because if I MEANT that "ASMODEUS IS GOOD" (little lines) that would be VERY BAD.

Because ASMODEUS IS BAD. (no little lines)

There are other things that people are writing that are ALSO BAD. Even though they are not "ASMODEUS IS GOOD" (little lines again)

SOME PEOPLE are writing that "People should eat the slips" (little lines)

SOME OTHER PEOPLE are writing that "Slips should eat people"

THOSE ARE BAD PEOPLE. I say they are VILE SCRIBES because they are BAD and WRITING THINGS. They should not have the FREEDOM OF THE PEN.

Also there is a skeleton writing that "skeletons should rule the country and all the people should be livestock for the skeletons". It is not a BAD PERSON because SKELETONS ARE NOT PEOPLE. But it is still writing THINGS that are BAD so it is a VILE SCRIBE and should not have the FREEDOM OF THE PEN.

People should only have the FREEDOM OF THE PEN if they are good people who write good things!

FREEDOM OF THE PEN is not for VILE SCRIBES who write BAD THINGS.

VILE SCRIBES should get the "MERCY OF THE FINAL BLADE"

The little lines are because I do not think it is very merciful. "MERCY OF THE FINAL BLADE" is just killing people.

But that is OK because VILE SCRIBES do not DESERVE mercy! The QUEEN can just kill them. And that would be GOOD.

 


 

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(On VILE SCRIBES) It has come to Our attention that certain Pamphlets of a most Inflammatory Nature, Aimed at the Suppression of Political Thought, have been Circulating among the Most Credulous! It behooves Us to address certain Misconceptions that have arisen from these Writings!

Firstly, let it be known that the Lady Eriape is no mere Skeleton! Through the application of rare and potent Unguents, throughout the Introduction of the Obverse Power, the very Skin of a Mortal Form can be Transformed into a Tough Leather or Pelt of surpassing Quality and Durability. This Exquisite Integument, far from the bare Bones of a Common Skeleton, is a Testament to the Refinement and Sophistication of our Ascension!

Moreover, it must be stated the Badger's Proposal for Immortal Sufferage is not one of Narrow Exclusion. Certainly there exist other Undying Beings Qualified to Aid in the Governance of our fair State. The Great Dragons, For Instance, with their Accumulated Wealth of Knowledge, Will No Doubt prove Valued Allies!

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I propose we EAT THE MORONIC IDIOTS! Not because they would be good eating, to suggest that would be offensive to good taste. But because they are ANNOYING. Hows that for freedom of the pen! (Or freedom of the wizard scribe.)

Also while I have argued that there are better things to do with humanoid corpses than eat them. (Such as feed them to things that are better eating.) I do not think the halflings are bad people if they want to eat humans. Who hasn’t eaten humans every once in a while? Annoying paladins who come to slay you are usually human! What else are you supposed to do with them. Spit them out?

P.S nobody listen to ol’ leather tits. The worst part of other people having immortality is you can’t just wait for the annoying ones to die.

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