The morning after the Bellparty (Safesun time), Kerron arrives at Isle Esme in response to Elspeth's invitation and starts looking for his uncloid. He comes bearing a little box of danishes.
His background desires to pet his poof and maybe have another danish abruptly disappear. He continues petting the poof, just as he was - he displays no significant outward signs of stress, nothing to suggest that what he just said might be a problem for him - but he is now completely devoid of wants about things.
Kerron watches the cloud of colorshapes go still.
Kerron is silent for a long moment, then says, "That... is... surprising? I'm sorry, I don't - if you - the colorshapes have all stopped broadcasting anything and I don't have a checklist to go by on how to react when a human twelve-year-old tells me that to fall back on."
"Witches and ingots kind of orient around our powers a lot. I'm really used to navigating by the - you realize Elspeth cannot possibly know this? Same reason - she doesn't do secrecy - I'm not saying if she knew it'd be in the next imperial press release, but she would have mentioned it to me in the course of inviting me here expressly to talk to you. She definitely has no idea."
"She kidnapped me and she didn't even know what from?"
"She knew it was something bad that it would be better to be out of than in. The specifics? I don't think that's usual. Elspeth soaked up a lot of Joker childhood memories as a crash course before she got Harley - if there'd been anything like that in there she would've known or at least guessed, and then because she's Elspeth and works how she works it'd be something approaching common knowledge. Which it's not."
"Someone like... Lily probably wouldn't know," says Kerron. "It wouldn't come up with her - if Elspeth tried to communicate everything in her head constantly regardless of its relevance she'd wind up killing unprotected humans, she doesn't just randomly share absolutely everything. But I'd know, the Imperial Alpha - Jacob - would know, Mum and Harley would know, people close to them like me or Dad or Harley's wolf would probably hear it, Her Majesty would know. So - given that if you don't want me to tell Elspeth I don't have to. She gets that there's reasons to not tell her things."
He shrugs. He pets his poof. He has a vague flicker of actually wanting to pet his poof. It doesn't stay.
"I... don't have a comprehensive definition. You're doing this not-wanting-anything thing except for a flicker about petting your critter and I've never seen it before. I don't know if it means you're hurting or you're shut down or I should leave or I should hug you or what."
"I don't want to make anything worse? I don't know if I'm qualified to make anything better but I hold myself to a firm standard of not making things worse."
"I don't think you could make it worse if you tried," he says. He doesn't necessarily believe it, but then, that isn't always a factor when Jokers say things.
"Well - I'm not as sure. Anyway, maybe I'm more qualified than I think I am, except it's beyond me how."
"Because you're a kid who had some lousy shit happen and that sucks and most people are not totally void of empathy?"
"I don't get it," he says. "It doesn't make any sense. It sucks for me but it doesn't suck for you, you don't have to care, why would you?"
"Well - I guess I might regret asking this, but if against all probability I - I don't know - tripped and wound up accidentally biting off half of my hand and for some reason didn't have any coins on me and had to wait for it to heal the long way and was thoroughly unhappy about that? Would you care?"