"Is it quick to explain? I want to tell everybody I know and also lots of Internet strangers about you."

"Oh, go ahead. I want to see what you have to say about me!"

"My Twitter username is glorifiednachos77."

"Thanks! Do you want me to pose for a picture?"

"I was assuming you would say no but I would love that" Phone out. Picture!

Thor fucking loves posing for pictures.

Yay!!!! (The other paramedics also want to get in on this.)

Would they also like him to tell stories they can share with the internet? (Extremely famous, identifying stories that anyone who could have made this place would recognize. Either they'll come fight him or he'll scare them off. Either works.)

Hell yeah they would!

"A long time ago, a shapeshifter named Thjazi kidnapped one of my relatives, Iðunn, who grows apples of eternal youth. Thjazi kept her prisoner and stole her apples, so the rest of us would grow old while he and his daughter lived forever. But most of my family searched for her - we searched in towns and around farms, we searched the skies, we asked for help searching the sea, and eventually we found someone who had helped to kidnap her and knew where Thjazi was keeping her. We threatened him into helping us rescue her - we sent him off to shrink her with magic and fly her home to Asgard.

Of course, we knew Thjazi would fly after him, so we laid a trap. We laid out all the fuel we needed for a huge fire right by the gate, all plane shavings and stuff that would catch fast. The wall doesn't really let you fly in over it, so Iðunn came in flying just above it and Thjazi had no choice but to follow her or turn back. We lit the fire just as Iðunn got past it and it blazed up fast enough to set Thjazi's feathers on fire. So that brought him to the ground.

Even so, he was still a dangerous shapeshifter - but he was on fire and surprised so many of us were waiting for him. We won." People from the area this place is modeled after don't usually like more gory details than that these days.

"His daughter came to us afterward. For revenge. We made a monument to Thjazi and did a couple of other things for her and she forgave us."

"Why does only one person grow the apples of eternal youth?"

"Yeah, can we have some?"

"She tried to teach me how to take care of them once and I couldn't do it. I don't have any with me. The humans who can lie get to go places after they die - sometimes to stay at my dad's place and spar with each other there. I don't know why I haven't heard of any of you showing up there."

"Lying is the -"

"The thing where you make somebody wrong?"

"I'm not sure I want to go anywhere after I die. I'd get rot everywhere."

"Yeah, that's what lying is. Uh, they don't just go there and rot, they go there and talk and practice fighting and meet people - just differently than how living people do it."

"Like, while rotting?"

"I guess if you knew you were going to go somewhere you could get embalmed first."

"That doesn't last forever!"

"...Do I need to explain souls - uh, you know how you can be you even if you lose a leg, and you can get a prosthetic leg so you can walk and run? They leave their rotting parts behind."

"I'm not... aware of parts we have that don't rot? Unless they fossilize? Are they skeletons?"

"How would a skeleton go anywhere? You need muscles and stuff to move the bones around and keep them together."

"I'm no good at explaining souls but they're not your bones, they're... your thought and will and mind and that kind of thing."

"I thought we did that with our brains? Are they prosthetic brains?"

"That's... not completely wrong? It's not really right, either, but it's sort of like that."

"Prosthetic brains, sort of, that can have all your memories and everything? Cool!"

"They are pretty cool!"

"And you've never seen one of us have a prosthetic brain going someplace?"

"I haven't. And that's really surprising and it makes me think whoever made this place didn't mean well."

"I guess it would be nice to have one."

"Well we could have them they'd just be going someplace separate."

"But they're not just not visiting Thor's dad, they're also not coming back here or even phoning!"