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Shell Bell finds Milliways once when she is eighteen. She has been there for two days now, setting up her sign ten minutes out of every waking hour, wiping down tables for her quarters in the staff area, eating buttery potatoes (she has been told that this is a complete nutrient package, for humans). Her wand is holding a bun of hair in place on the back of her head. Her shells are stashed safely in her room; she's budgeting carefully and she'll pay her tab when she leaves.
No one's talked to her due to the sign yet. They don't always. She sets it up anyway, like clockwork, so everyone gets the chance.
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she_sells_seashells
manofmyword
"There was this girl, y'see," he says. "And I guess she thought there were too many criminals in Gotham—mind you, she mighta been right—and she decided what they really needed was the hell scared out of 'em. Worked out fine as far as that goes. After the first coupla times she swooped in on a drug deal and beat everybody half to death, they were sure as fuck scared, lemme tell ya. But some of 'em were mad, too."
she_sells_seashells
"Okay," Bell says, trying to figure out if she's supposed to imagine a rogue Peacekeeper or maybe a member of the fictional United Panem Defenders.
manofmyword
"Some of these people decided—well, I say decided, I might've had a little something to do with it—anyway, they hired me to kill the lady. She had 'em by the balls, see; they couldn't make any money with her wrecking their operations from here to Sunday. Heh."
He delicately picks another jelly bean out of the bowl in front of him. This one is blood red.
Crunch.
"Buuuut I didn't really wanna kill her," he says. "I just wanted her attention. I got it, too. We chased each other around the city a couple times, she got me in a police interrogation room and roughed me up some, I detonated a friend'a mine and left... oh, it was loads'a fun."
He delicately picks another jelly bean out of the bowl in front of him. This one is blood red.
Crunch.
"Buuuut I didn't really wanna kill her," he says. "I just wanted her attention. I got it, too. We chased each other around the city a couple times, she got me in a police interrogation room and roughed me up some, I detonated a friend'a mine and left... oh, it was loads'a fun."
manofmyword
"Oh, it was," he says with a nostalgic smile.
"Didn't last, though. I blew some more stuff up; she threw me off a building and then turned me over to the cops." He dusts off his hands.
"Didn't last, though. I blew some more stuff up; she threw me off a building and then turned me over to the cops." He dusts off his hands.
she_sells_seashells
"Oh." Well - he's not an Avox. He looks like he could've been flogged, maybe more than flogged, but he doesn't sound like that would stop him. What is it other worlds usually do? "And your prison has enough doors in it that you can come here sometimes?"
manofmyword
"Nope," he says again. "Her majesty didn't like my style, so she found somebody to take her to my world for a bit and she put me on a little asteroid all by myself."
she_sells_seashells
Bell blinks.
"...Because her boyfriend cheated on her with you?" she asks skeptically. That doesn't sound like her, let alone like the utopia-building versions of her with magic whose citizens tend to have such nice things to say. "Or because you were going to blow up more things from inside prison?"
"...Because her boyfriend cheated on her with you?" she asks skeptically. That doesn't sound like her, let alone like the utopia-building versions of her with magic whose citizens tend to have such nice things to say. "Or because you were going to blow up more things from inside prison?"
she_sells_seashells
"Oh."
Yeah, she could see doing that.
Bell doesn't even know enough about astronomy to ask how he can live on an asteroid. She is vaguely aware that asteroids are in space.
Yeah, she could see doing that.
Bell doesn't even know enough about astronomy to ask how he can live on an asteroid. She is vaguely aware that asteroids are in space.
manofmyword
He shrugs.
"Kinda lonely up here, but she gave me some neat magic toys, so I don't starve or get too bored. And every so often, this place shows up. That's always fun."
"Kinda lonely up here, but she gave me some neat magic toys, so I don't starve or get too bored. And every so often, this place shows up. That's always fun."
she_sells_seashells
"They go on television and outlast twenty-three other teenagers in a deadly arena, usually by killing at least some of them," says Bell. "There are other ways that I guess are more common world to world - other television, some books, some music. But most celebrities do that first."
she_sells_seashells
"You're too old for it, or I'd take you through my door and suggest you volunteer and some kid could stay home and live."
Bell says this as one of the kids who got to stay home and live.
Bell says this as one of the kids who got to stay home and live.
she_sells_seashells
"Well, it helps that if I bring a terrorist home, there's some people I'd be willing to aim one at," Bell says, shrugging. "I have to overthrow a government."