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we'll build a Lucy and we'll make Lamashtu pay for it
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Lusilla bops behind her. 

"Hello, what are you doing exactly?"

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"Oh, hello there! I'm doing science, obviously. An audience is acceptable for this experiment, as long as you don't interfere." 

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"What are you talking about--"

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The woman ignores her and steps away, walking towards the cultists. 

One of the cultists notices her. "Hey you! Who are you? Does anyone recognize her?" 

"Greetings, boys and girls! I am your sister in sin, a devotee of Lord Baphomet's dark will, and so on and so forth." 

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Lusilla bops back to the others. "I think...she is not a real Baphomet cultist," she says, quietly enough that the cultists and the faux-cultist won't hear her. 

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Seelah grimaces wryly. "I think you're right about that." 

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"She looks like one of us, but she talks kinda weird..." another cultist muses nervously. Then he notices Lusilla's party. "Who's there with you?"

"Who?" Neno glances back. "Oh, them! Just an audience, they don't matter. Consider them a supplementary component of the coming experiment. In the name of our Lord Baphomet, please be so kind as to undertake a little test of your competency in our wicked cause. Let's start with something simple. What is Lord Baphomet's favored weapon?" 

"We will not answer to you," one cultist begins angrily. 

"Our lord can wield any kind of weapon! He is all-powerful," another declaims. 

"Wrong! He wields no weapons at all, he doesn't need any--he just gores his enemies with his horns!" another one protests. 

"These answers are wrong!" Nenio chirps. "The correct answer is Aizerghaul, a glaive made of red adamantine. This experiment has taken quite a surprising turn. I would never have expected the followers of the great Baphomet to be baffled by such a simple question. Fine, let's recalibrate the difficulty and proceed with the next question. Please name Lord Baphomet's sacred animal." 

"A bull, of course!" The one who claimed he wields any weapon says. "Everybody knows that." 

"Yep. And a cow," the horns one nods. 

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Snort. "Technically, it's an aurochs." 

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"I'd like to ask you to stop prompting them, but it seems they could do with a prompt or two," Nenio remarks.  "It appears the experiment has yielded results which are as unexpected as they are incredible. Baphomet's cultists have not the slightest idea about who Baphomet really is, let alone any in-depth knowledge of his ideology or philosophy. I'm positive that this news will cause a sensation in widest scientific circles."

"Damn it, she's right," one of the cultists says in disgust. "I'm a shitty excuse for a cultist. And my mother used to tell me to become a plowman..." 

"Hey, take it easy!" another one protests. "We've only had two questions! You there, come on, ask another one. We'll get the next one!" 

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"Let them try!" Lusilla calls. This is, frankly, too funny not to enable. 

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"Is there any sense in continuing? You cannot answer the simplest of questions. I am ashamed of you, as cultists and as individuals." 

"Please, ask again. I can answer, I'm sure I can!" begs the cultist who isn't a plowman.

Nenio sighs. "How do you spell Baphomet's name." 

Not-Plowman screws up his face. "B...A...F...A...screw it! To hell with Baphomet! I thought it was gonna be fun, but instead there are all these questions! I'm done here. I'm going back to my village, back to my mother! 

"Hey, wait... You there--how dare you stir up discord in our ranks! Get them!" 

"The experiment is complete. Unable to deal with the questions, the cultists decide to deal with the examiner instead. A typical reaction for a person who has never been burdened with any intelligence. Now you're going to start hitting each other, aren't you? Please, proceed. I won't interrupt."

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In response, Starfish. 

 

Between Suddenly, Starfish, Woljif throwing a Grease in the middle of the group of cultists which totally fails to affect Lusilla on account of how they can fly, and Seelah and Camellia being really good at stabbing things and Lann at shooting things, it doesn't take long to dispatch every cultist except the one fortunate enough to decide to quit. Lusilla sincerely hopes he makes it out of the city alive and makes good on his repentance. 

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Nearby, not so nearby that it's inevitable that they be noticed, but not so far away that they couldn't possibly be seen, a hooded figure seemingly untouched by the destruction around them states, "the absence of an answer is an answer too," before walking out of sight. 

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"How interesting! Tell me, is that your original form, or one granted by a magical ability?" 

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"Oh, this is what I really look like!" 

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"Fascinating," the scientist says, and gets out a tape to begin measuring Lusilla's various dimensions. 

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"What are you...doing?" 

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"Science! As the future author of the Encyclopedia Golarionnica, it's important that I learn as much as I can about absolutely everything." She takes down notes. "Are you a typical member of your species?" 

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"If there's any more of the thing that I am, I don't know about it," Lusilla says apologetically. "My mother got pregnant the night her village burned down, but she never saw what did it." 

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"Hmm. Unfortunate. You seem capable of flight; what other abilities do you have?" 

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"Um. Who are you?"

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"Ah, of course. My apologies. My name is Nenio. I am an explorer, a pilgrim, a yet-to-be-recognized scientific luminary, and future rector of all Absalom's universities at once. Also, I know some spells." 

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So, a wizard. Lusilla is pretty sure this is what wizards are like, from her stories. 

...Wizards in stories are also, like, useful, in addition to crazy. 

"I don't have time to tell you all about myself right now, we're in a hurry. Do you want to come with us so I can explain later?"

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"Do you wish to become my follower? To accompany me on my expeditions to the Worldwound? To assist me in my experiments? To run errands for me? Perhaps even to write down my deepest thoughts for the benefit of future generations? Oh, how splendid! Of course, I agree! Truth be told, I have no money to pay you. But you will be aiding the progress of science, and that is its own reward!"

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The real reward, obviously, is wizard spells to fling at the demons. "Okay!" 

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