Fuck. It got her.

And now this bullshit.

She checks over the room by reflex and scowls at the woman.

"You died. I'm not sure what would normally have become of you after that, but in this case the Ineffable Will of the Multiverse-" She looks kind of like she wants to do an eye-roll, but is refraining. "-Has decided you should be reincarnated into a new world as the villain of the story. With the chance to choose many aspects of how exactly it will play out, though not all of them. I'm here to tell you all about it and advise and help you as much as I'm allowed to."

What the fuck.

"I know it's extremely strange. This place is safe, and doesn't really - exist properly, you should be able to will things up if you'd like to be a bit more comfortable, or think for a bit first."

"Last place I was didn't exist properly either. That doesn't make it safe."

"It exists even less than the Scholomance. I have some notes on your life but not a real understanding. You will be going to a different universe, with different magic, different countries..."

"How tremendously jolly for me."

"I can't get you out of it, but I can help you make the best of it?"

"Yeah, a lot of people aren't very happy about it."

"You work for this outfit why?"

"...I was created whole cloth. If I quit I'd go into, cold storage I guess, and someone else would pop up to replace me."

"That strike you as a solid reason, there?"

"It actually does, which is probably part of how I was designed! So. Uh. No, it has not escaped me that the Will does not have anyone's best interests at heart, necessarily."

"Ah-huh. But you're designed to work it out for me best you can in spite of how your creator doesn't give an agglo's nut?"

"Yeah, whether that means setting yourself up as comfy as you can, or trying to screw the system in one way or another- Though given that it's possible to feel like you're screwing the system that might be left open deliberately-"

"How ineluctably charming."

"Straight to the troubling philosophical implications this time. Lovely."

"Why, what do most people do?"

"Freak out about how they died, celebrate about getting to be a princess, geek out over magic and the chance to worldbuild for themselves, try to optimize for making as many people happy and safe in their new world as possible- Most aren't magic already-"

"Well, I suppose given the chance to invent it they'll come up with something pleasanter than being magically delicious."

"Mmhm. Usually they get to invent it or at least have dominant creative input, occasionally the Will has something specific in mind. Nothing for you. Yours is incredibly horrible as magic goes. Technically 'no magic' is also an option but hardly anybody does that."

"It'd be an interesting change."

"If you want to, you can definitely choose it! There's a separate slider for the general technology level, you can go all the way up to cyberpunk and space opera, have starships and AIs and other tech to replace most conceivable everyday magic."

"Huh."