"...mostly what stands out here is an absence—I was a violent bully until the Meg disaster and it sounds like you weren't."

Zag did not see that one coming! Uh, good on Other Zag for being so thoroughly reformed?

"I wasn't," he agrees. "But that's a difference between us again rather than anything about the others, I feel?"

"Seems likely. But knowing that now, I think my Meg disaster and yours probably went... differently."

"...yeah, probably."

But also here are some shades to interrupt them.

Violence time again!

This Zag is definitely taking a harsher beating than the other one, but so far he's still keeping up.

"So, my expectation here is that we can probably hold on until the Coliseum," says local Zag, "and then Theseus and Asterius will wipe the floor with us afterwards. We could just die here if you want but seeing Theseus in his natural habitat might be... informative... about yours."

"...oh? I've never met my Theseus. But sure, let's try for that."

"I was really excited about meeting him, I'd heard much and more about him, but... Well, you'll see."

More violence!

He's pretty content to wait to find out what Other Zag is talking about. In the meantime, he is learning so much about Elysium! Mostly that it's very lovely and full of deadly hazards!

Most of the deadly hazards are to be fair specifically put there by Lord Hades, it's probably just lovely full stop otherwise.

As predicted, they get to the gates of the Coliseum in not too many pieces, though Other Zag is noticeably much worse for wear than This Zag. After making sure no opportunity attacks are forthcoming, he pushes the gates open and steps into the arena.

Inside are, as usual, the Champions of Elysium: Asterius, the Bull of Minos, and...

A golden haired man with glistening muscles and a glittering smile. Theseus, once-King and founder of Athens.

"We meet again, fiend! And..." He looks at Other Zag. "... fiend??! What manner of foul joke is this, for a shade to have a shade of his own? Is this some narcissistic attempt to even the odds for you? Well, whatever wicked witchcraft is responsible for this offensive display will not save you! For I, Theseus, Champion of Elysium, am worth a thousandfold of you and your shadows, so summon all you like! It will not save you!"

... he blinks.

"All right, I see what you mean," he says to Other Zag, ignoring Theseus.

The bull snorts. "Get ready, little ones. Good luck."

Perhaps making this man even more annoying is the fact that Theseus, Champion of Elysium, who will not stop showboating for this crowd is... actually very good at his job, and has basic abilities of observation. Like, one of the Zags being less experienced than the other.

Other Zag is about to have a really bad time. All of those annoying shades that had shields and could only be attacked from one direction? Yeah, he has that. Except he has a spear, and he hits so much harder.

This Zag tries his best to get in Theseus's way to deflect him but isn't very hopeful.

Especially since Asterius is also good at what he does and can help the King by preventing This Zag from helping Other Zag.

Yeah no, this is way out of his league.

He hangs on long enough to get one (1) hit in, and then Theseus smashes him flat.

He does get to hear what Theseus has to say before the river Styx takes him.

"And now your tricks show their value. Which is none at all!"

The odds properly unevened once again, it's now time for the unflattened Zag to have a bad time.

Nah, fuck this. "Sorry, Asterius, I'll give you better game next time," he says, and then stabs himself with his own sword.

This Zag knows This Theseus well enough to know that, actually, that was the one thing that would most annoy Theseus. They have an audience! Where is This Zag's showmanship!!!!

".... You are right, to fall on your own sword rather than face me!!! Begone, coward, and never return!" he says, but it's very obvious that he's put out by not getting to kill him personally.

...that was funny actually.

Well, back to the House of Hades, then.

Zag is waiting for Other Zag in the pool, mostly because he'd feel weird about trying to talk to anyone who knows Other Zag without a blatantly obvious visible signal that he's a different person. More blatantly obvious and visible than red legs.

It doesn't take long for This Zag to emerge. "Hello again," he says, with a small smile. "Theseus was very put out that I killed myself."