A food enters the building and sits down in a pew.

It's kind of hungry and this food is already being a little boring, but maybe they'll illuminatingly interact with the flat things soon so it decides not to nibble on them.  It's gonna keep making fun echoey noises while it waits for them to do something interesting though.

It doesn't take one of the resident flat things but does presently produce a flat thing of its own. It opens it up - no tearing - and looks at some of the flatness.

Hm.  Just looking at it?  Is there anything interesting about the flatness?  Is it making fun, non-ripping noises of some kind?

Just looking at it! No noises! The flatness has some black marks on it.

It looks really hard at the black marks, trying to see them better and figure them out.  (Oops, that was a nibble.)

The food starts crying.

Oh come on, that was ONE nibble.  It will be extra careful about not taking any more.

The food stops crying eventually and turns over one of the thin flat things to be looking at different marks.

The marks are so mysterious.  Does the food look at different different marks after a while?

Yes, if supervised long enough it will gradually page through a lot of different different marks.

Just as predicted!  It's so smart.  . . . It's a little bored.  It ""sings"" as it waits to see if it can resolve the marks and the flat things in general and the foods' actions towards them into something that makes any sense.

The food is not especially helpful toward this end.

Hmmmmm.

Maybe if it goes outside and looks for a food that, while not the usual sort of boring, is at least not doing anything very interesting, and has a snack, and comes back, things will make sense then.

It can find foods sitting on a bench making sounds to each other, and foods walking down the sidewalk, and foods in cars, and foods in shops, and foods in strollers, and foods in pubs.

Oh no that's all pretty interesting.  It hovers over the hood and peers through the windshield of a car waiting at a stop sign.

The food in there is tapping the circle in front of it, and humming along to the radio!

sounds.

The sounds go up and down and LOUDER and softer and ba-dum-ba-dum-ba-dum and oooOOOoo.

These are the BEST sounds it has EVER heard.  It is paying way too much attention to the sounds to have any chance of noticing when the car starts to move.

The car begins to roll when the cars going the other way have enough gap.

Sounds sounds sounds sounds!

The car and all its sounds clonk into its legs. The sounds are drowned out by a HOOOOOOONK.

Such bonking and clonking does all this not-home contain D:  At least it had an idea that this category of happening existed this time.  Also that sound is NOT the best sound it has ever heard.  Maybe it should nibble on the food about this - no, that might mean the good sounds never come back, somehow; foods are so confusing.

It doesn't maneuver itself out of the way of the car while pondering this.

The car stops, pressed up against its legs, and the food gets out of it and comes around to look at the situation before it, though of course it's missing some important information.