Diana is woken by the Sun, bright white, rising over the surface of the moon. The ground beneath her is powdery, a little soft, and it presses up against her with far less force than she's used to. There is a glowing red ring on her right hand.
She has a moment of peace, as she imagines she wakes and looks up at the stars - 'Wait, fuck, that's the Sun! Augh! Why is that so bright! Stop it! Dim the extra light already!' - because this is at least a novel dream...and then, she notices the red ring full of rage on her finger, tugging at her thoughts. That's not supposed to be in some peaceful dream of moonbound stargazing, or whatever else this could be, not to mention how she couldn't possibly generate all the sense-impressions of strange gravity as she rolls to her feet, her hand between the Sun and her eyes on general principle, and kicks up the lunar sand, flipping end-over-end because she just exerted way too much force for low-gee environments.
Color-free version:
She has a moment of peace, as she imagines she wakes and looks up at the stars - 'Wait, fuck, that's the Sun! Augh! Why is that so bright! Stop it! Dim the extra light already!' - because this is at least a novel dream...and then, she notices the red ring full of rage on her finger, tugging at her thoughts. That's not supposed to be in some peaceful dream of moonbound stargazing, or whatever else this could be, not to mention how she couldn't possibly generate all the sense-impressions of strange gravity as she rolls to her feet, her hand between the Sun and her eyes on general principle, and kicks up the lunar sand, flipping end-over-end because she just exerted way too much force for low-gee environments.
When she demands the Sun dim, her rage directed toward that irritation, she feels something shift inside her, something connected to the ring. An infinitesimal moment later, she hears—or experiences something her brain processes as akin to sound—a voice in her head.
"Compliance."
Red light bursts forth from the surface of the ring, expanding into a translucent red disk which obscures the sun, significantly dimming the light.
Once Diana is able to get her bearings and stand up, she notices the red glow surrounding her body, the curious absence of vacuum or noticeable temperature, and the red, vaguely lantern-shaped object sitting on the surface of the moon next to her.
"...Fuck. Fuck fuck fuckity fuck FUUUUUCK!"
Her spate of expletives done, Diana attempts to exert her will through the ring... to a frustrating nullity of effect. 'Should have seen that coming. It's not fucking green, Diana, you can't will at it, dammit!' Looking on the bright side, her environment shield only wobbled a little bit!
At least being frustrated with having her lantern over there instead of in her possession is rather easy...
'That is going to get me flying, right? Wait. Fuck! Fucking edge colors and their fucking emotional states, I just want to fly to the nearest place I won't immediately explode if my shield drops for five seconds! With my Lantern!'
Colorless Version:
"...Fuck. Fuck fuck fuckity fuck FUUUUUCK!"
Her spate of expletives done, Diana attempts to exert her will through the ring... to a frustrating nullity of effect. 'Should have seen that coming. It's not fucking green, Diana, you can't will at it, dammit!' Looking on the bright side, her environment shield only wobbled a little bit!
At least being frustrated with having her lantern over there instead of in her possession is rather easy...
'That is going to get me flying, right? Wait. Fuck! Fucking edge colors and their fucking emotional states, I just want to fly to the nearest place I won't immediately explode if my shield drops for five seconds! With my Lantern!'
"Five seconds without functional environmental shield at present location is unlikely to result in explosion of user."
"I'd like to be somewhere with an actual atmosphere!"
Colorless:
"I'd like to be somewhere with an actual atmosphere!""Compliance. Flight plan plotted and underway."
Diana again feels something within her shift, and her rage suddenly has an outlet, propelling her at great speed away from the surface of the Moon. Scarcely a moment passes before she's thousands of feet above the surface, although she feels only a fraction of the acceleration. Red light flows from her ring and trails behind her.
"Fucking hell, this is the most exhausting day of my life and it has barely been five minutes. Ring. If I say I want to be somewhere where X thing won't occur if Y happens, I care more about whether I will be in significant - where significant is defined as 'capable of meaningfully impairing my ability to fight, think, or act as I wish to' - danger from Y happening than if I have correctly estimated the magnitude of that danger. Speaking of which," and she has no problem being angry enough to mean it when she thinks of this happening, "don't let anyone mind control me beyond the bounds of mind control I have explicitly consented to, and alert me if someone or something is reading my mind; ideally include the identity of the source and depth of their read if it is known. There's too goddamn many mind controllers."
Colorless:
"Fucking hell, this is the most exhausting day of my life and it has barely been five minutes. Ring. If I say I want to be somewhere where X thing won't occur if Y happens, I care more about whether I will be in significant - where significant is defined as 'capable of meaningfully impairing my ability to fight, think, or act as I wish to' - danger from Y happening than if I have correctly estimated the magnitude of that danger. Speaking of which," and she has no problem being angry enough to mean it when she thinks of this happening, "don't let anyone mind control me beyond the bounds of mind control I have explicitly consented to, and alert me if someone or something is reading my mind; ideally include the identity of the source and depth of their read if it is known. There's too goddamn many mind controllers."Well, that's her immediate thoughts sorted. Now...all that's left is waiting to get wherever she's going.
If she maintains the amount of rage she's been feeling about being stuck in space, it will take her another 9 minutes to reach Earth's upper atmosphere. As she nears the Earth, she slows down, and an ovoid shield of red light forms around her in time to deflect the reentry flames.
Honestly, her anger at being stuck in space kind of oscillates in a sinusoidal pattern as she notices that she's not accelerating, gets angry that this is going to take longer, speeds up, calms down a bit, stops accelerating again...but nine minutes is a perfectly respectable speed. When the planet's big enough to make places out, she has additional instructions. "Aim me nearby, but don't take me into, a big city, and if a flying humanoid shows up, we're going to be adjusting course. They're totally going to assume I'm a threat because I'm a fucking Red Lantern," and she's totally not bitter about this, how dare you cast such aspersions on her character, "and what with how there's so many Greens just around they wouldn't even normally be wrong, let alone the whole anger powers thing...Ring, who made you, and how did they do it?"
Well, there's nothing left for her to do but wait. And maybe fiddle with her -- she's not in -- fucking hell her uniform had better have a proper mask-and-or-helmet, not some mere sop of a domino mask masquerading as identity security. And make her hair red while she's in uniform.
Colorless:
Well, there's nothing left for her to do but wait. And maybe fiddle with her -- she's not in -- fucking hell her uniform had better have a proper mask-and-or-helmet, not some mere sop of a domino mask masquerading as identity security. And make her hair red while she's in uniform."Compliance."
A few minutes later, she touches down in the mountains north of some large city near the northern shore of South America. It's nighttime.
"...You know, I don't know why I was expecting myself to end up somewhere I'd actually recognize through some quirk of fate or chance. Ring, where the fuck am I, and how's my charge?"
"Searching local network. Currently located 3 kilometers north of Caracas, Venezuela, Earth, Sector 2814. 97% charge remaining."
"Very well then. Since I'm here, I may as well make the best of it. Tell me about Caracas. Comparing the city to a hypothetical perfectly average Earth city, what stands out from the norm, highest standard deviation to lowest? Are there superheroes and-or supervillains, here, and what is popular opinion of them like if so? What cults, secret societies, and gangs operate here, and what net effects do they have on the city? Include the police as a special case of gang."
"Unable to comply; inadequately specified. Local network contains records of superheroes, supervillains, and superheroes and/or supervillains acting in or near Caracas. Unable to comply; inadequately specified. Unable to comply; inadequately specified."
"What was inadequately specified about 'how does Caracas vary from the hypothetical perfectly average Earth city, from most different to least different', for goodness sakes, that's just statistics, not even a semantic problem, if there exists any cromulent definition of city..." She sighs, and plonks herself down on a convenient rock.
"If something is underspecified, request clarification; specify where the failure in specification occurred, and access local public information resources, exempli gratia public libraries, encyclopedias, and search engines, to see if specific definitions are available. In the event that you have legitimate access to a private database, consult that as well. Do not consult sources you have no legitimate authorization to access without first acquiring permission from myself, save in situations where it will noticeably expedite emergency response to do so."
"What superpowered individuals or groups have operated in or around Caracas in the past week, month, six months, and year? Display reported sightings of individuals or groups via an image of the super or group's head and logo, if available, superimposed over a map of the local area, and sightings with evidence with an additional checkmark, then give me a slider that allows me to select a window of time to filter the map. Cache this query, with the specified location as a variable, as 'super map'."
"'hypothetical perfectly average Earth city' inadequately specified. Sources of information to be used for comparison inadequately specified. If scans are required, more information needed to determine scanning parameters. If network data is to be used, data credibility threshold for inclusion inadequately specified; method to resolve conflicts between different data sources inadequately specified."
"Compliance. Unable to comply; inadequately specified. Clarification requested: 'legitimate'."
"Further network access awaiting clarification. Based on previously downloaded data..."
A map enters Diana's field of vision, displaying, per her parameters, sightings of various supers, mostly Venezuelan.
"...you know what, I probably shouldn't try to reinvent the World's Greatest Detective's wheel. If Batman has published guidelines on determining the accuracy and relevance of Earth's sources in investigative work, use those when investigating. If that does not exist, develop a model based off of the journalism of Clark Kent of the Daily Planet. ...Actually, develop that model anyway; I think it's more likely to be generally useful."
"Legitimate access to a private database: A request to access the database's data on a particular subject has been made and answered in the affirmative, and no standing request has been made by the maintainer of the database, or an agent they presently delegate handling access control to, that such access cease. In the event that such access handler is themself compromised by, exempli gratia, mind control, however, their requests should be disregarded."
"Is there anything I need to further specify in order to find a supervillain who I can...oh, what the fuck am I thinking. I'm not actually a qualified superhero, I've had a power ring for less than thirty minutes. I should not, in fact, go out and punch villains. That's not even the most power-to-util way to use super destruction powers. No, right now I should be looking into the most efficient way to reduce prevalence of environmental hazards; superfund sites or equivalent, oil spills, radiological contamination, wildfires if a power-efficient way exists to make them stop, curses, hellmouths, etcetera."
"No data. Unable to comply; inadequately specified. Clarification requested: parameters to construct model."
"Affirmative. Further clarification requested: 'legitimate authorization to access' 'sources' which cannot be described as 'private databases'."
"How good is your ability to do literary impact analysis, compared to existing standards of large groups of scientists?"
"Legitimate authorization to access sources not described as private databases... Okay, computer, let's see if I can explain this." Oddly enough, she's mostly feeling glee. This is a challenge, and she will rise to meet it.
"Firstly, for privately owned sources, the same general criteria apply; if permission has been granted by someone who is authorized to give it, and so on."
"For any source which is proclaimed to be open to the public, such as museums, or has no specific access controls upon your ability to request data therefrom such as encryption above and beyond format encoding, lock and key, or property law, such as utilizing a search engine, scanning the contents of a public library, or viewing any published newspaper article, you presumptively are allowed to access it."
"Is that clarification sufficient?"
"Very well then. ...Cache the 'how do you determine what a reliable source is' question for later; I'm on a mountain and I think I need more than five minutes to think about it. As for scanning...By default, you may scan anything that is in a public place, as such are colloquially and legally defined, or visible from a public place. Additionally, regardless of privacy concerns, you should track sources of significant nuclear radiation - such as would be meaningfully harmful to be exposed to on the scale of days, or is concealed within an item that is not a smoke detector or Geiger counter -, Kryptonite radiation especially in amounts that would affect an unshielded Kryptonian, advanced technology such as Power Rings, Reach scarabs, or nanomachine swarms, cosmic rays of the type that inexplicably create superhumans, X-ionized material, Nth metal, hazardous magic, poltergeists...you can read my mind; if I'd think it's weird, if I'd think it's a danger if I knew what it was, put it on the list of Stuff To Watch Out For On Earth and alert me if it comes within range of being a threat to me - or in the case of Kryptonite, a Kryptonian -, is on a property I'm investigating or domiciled within, or is within...500 meters of myself."
"...Why do you require such permission, and what are you going to do with it? ...And you can assume that I will want to know that information anytime such a thing comes up."