"AIDS vaccine!"

“…chocolate ice cream.”

"...dicks."

“Aaand we’re back.”

"Are you saying you don't want dicks as a meal option."

“Dude that’s the most easily ruined wish I can imagine.”

"I wasn't going to phrase it like that!"

“How were you gonna phrase it.”

"...I hadn't gotten that far yet."

Snort.

“Problem with sucking dick through lunch is that then you don’t, like, eat.”

"Ruin all my fun, why don't you."

“Hey, that’s not a veto! Works great if you wanna skip lunch.”

"No, no, you skip lunch too much already."

"Amphetamines are great like that," he says, cheerfully.

"Man cannot live on adderall alone, dude."

"How about adderall, blowjobs and dinner?"

"No. Eat your damn lunch."

"Now who's bossy."

He will reluctantly put sandwich in his mouth. Nom.

"I'm not bossy, I'm the boss."

Sandwich. Handbook-perusal.

"So we're getting rid of the Pledge of Allegiance bullshit, right?"

"Oh, for fucking sure. I don't get how people don't realize how creepy that shit is."

"...hold on, let me look up its origin and make sure we're not reversing a decisive victory in World War Two or something."

"...yyeah let's. Wait on that, I guess."

He thumbs through pages in the meantime.

"It's cool, lemme just..."

Google is his friend.

"...yeah no it was just some dude who thought it would be a cool idea."

Pledges of Allegiance and a Minute of Silence (All Grade Levels)

Each school day, students will recite the Pledge of Allegiance to the U.S. flag and the Pledge of Allegiance to the Texas flag. Parents may submit a written request to the principal to excuse their child from reciting a pledge.

"—wait, I should get that one. So I can remember it."

"How attached are you to remembering that? Sure, I guess."

He erases his strikethrough and passes the book over.