On the commuter train:
"Hey can I help you? You keep staring at me."
"Oh sorry, my eyes are just wandering and getting stuck places."
Angrily: "Well it's really rude to stare, could you stop!"
Getting angry too: "Well it's not my fault you're reflecting photons in my direction! Could you perhaps stop doing that?!"
Petulant: "Fine!"
A *worp* sound as the person promptly disappears from view.
Mollified and surprised: "Oh... Uh, okay!" Goes back to looking out the window.
"Sorry could you hold the leash of your dog when I walk past? It's a little scary."
"Oh don't worry, he's harmless. Wouldn't hurt a fly."
"That might well be the case, but I'm a bit afraid of dogs, so I really would prefer it if you could hold his leash."
"Oh I wouldn't do that to my little buddy."
"Oh god damn it I'll walk the long way around."
"Wow, people are such assholes. Don't you think, Bubsy?"
A 2 meter high dire wolf with mandibles, seventeen eyes and a tentacled mane comes into frame: "GRYAAAAAAAHHH"
Unphased desipite the hair flying back from the air pressure:
"Right you are Bubsy, right you are."
DM: Okay, the friendly cultist says "Alas, you must not observe the last steps of the ritual. Avert your eyes!"
Bard, chaotic neutral: Aha, he wants to keep his secrets. I respond "I solemnly swear!"
DM: Okay the cultist starts chanting again, holding his hands out to the flame, and he reaches a fever pitch and screams as the flame roars. Do you peek?
Bard: Obviously!
DM: Okay, hm, your studies included natural philosophy before you started studying music, didn't they? So you'd have a fair chance at understanding what you're seeing, right?
Bard: Yup!
DM: Cool, you take 20d4 psychic damage.
Bard: fuck
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