"He might have diseases."

"Hey!"

Nie Huaisang processes that Masozi said something. "Incest is when you have sex with a family member."

It is so weird having a conversation where everything he says gets translated, and then creates a debate on the definition. ...Though he did walk into that one.

(And sleeping with two different cousins might be playing with fire, but that is why he asked.) "What etiquette text did you get that one out of, Zixun?"

"The Book of Is There Literally One Hole, Just One, In Which You Have Not Stuck Your Dick, Jing Yi."

"Well, I think we have established I'm not sleeping with Hu Zixuan."

"....Huh. Is doing that bad?" It certainly seems mysterious and inexplicable that someone would want to, but honestly that's already true of sex in general, for Masozi. 

"That's a complicated question."

"You watch too much porn."

"If you have a baby with someone closely genetically related to you then they're more likely to get a genetic disease? If it's gay it's fine, just like sex in the Scholomance, but unlike sex in the Scholomance most people think it's really gross and don't want to do it."

"It makes family reunions really awkward."

"Yeah, that's true. You don't want to be stuck having to talk to your ex every New Year for the rest of your life."

"According to, like, the laws of physics, your dick has to be in some locations and not in others, so I think you should devote some time to thinking about places where your dick is not and should not be. It can't be everything! Or everywhere! Can't be in everyone at once! Did you know that? Because sometimes you make me think you don't know that."

"Oh Zixun, you wound me." It is accurate that there are places his dick may take his leave of, if he's going to be insistent about it. (...but wards. Damnit.)

"Fuck you. I'm taking the wards off."

If Ayako pretends really hard that she finds this uncomplicatedly funny and she's not stressed at all, maybe it will become true. 

Probably not. That's not usually how this works. But maybe! 

"Well, if you're going to be transactional about it, and pretend it didn't mean anything--" is Jin Zixun weak to wounded puppy eyes? He hopes Jin Zixun is weak to wounded puppy eyes.

(If he loses the wards-- Leng Yue is not going to kill him, because she is "nice." But he is going to wish he was dead when he has to explain that he got in a sex comedy of errors relating to there being two Zixuans in this school, apparently, and this lead to a public fight and also losing the wards.)

"--oh god don't make that face at me. I'm pissed at you!"

"Because of an innocent mistake!" Look at how small and hurt and in love and in need of protection he is. How could you be so mean to this face?

Gosh. A master at work.

"You should have known better!"

"I had no idea you meant the Beijing freshmen. If you'd said no, I never would have done it, no questions asked." (Sorry, Zixuan. You're strategically useful, but not that strategically useful. Leng Yue will not make him regret living if he upsets you.)

"All right," he says grumpily.

Awwwww. The show is over.

Thank fucking god, the show is over.