Wen Qing knocks on the door to the nurse's office. "Excuse me, ma'am?" she says in heavily accented but understandable English.
"I would like you to give me a range of antidepressants with at least a 30 day supply of each one."
After a long pause:
The void wall spits out half a dozen very weathered and tattered bottles into Marian's hands.
"- Eeeek!" Marian scrambles to catch all of them.
"....Um, right, it looks like I have - two bottles of Prozac and two bottles of Wellbutrin and two bottles of Phenelzine, or Nardil– uh, that one's really effective but also you can't eat, like, any chocolate or aged cheese or, I don't know, probably twenty other things...."
"That's one's fine to use here because all the cafeteria food is nutrient paste that has been convinced to look like food. --Are there any that shouldn't be mixed with alcohol?"
".....Ummmm I think pretty much all antidepressants say you shouldn't drink on the label but I think most of that is bullshit? ....I think it'd be most likely to be risky with the third one, Phenelzine, that hits a bunch of enzymes and I don't understand it super well. I do know that you super shouldn't mix alcohol with sedatives - so, like, whatever benzodiazepine was in the pill organizer I got for your other friend," she's already forgotten it, "...just, basically, anything that's a central nervous system depressant, is a bad idea to mix with alcohol, because it's also that?"
(- Marian is going to NOT MENTION all of the questionable recreational drug choices that she herself has made, which seemed to turn out fine but then again she's apparently landed herself in a fantasy magic death school so she should maybe have more questions there...)
"I will give the Phenelzine to Wen Ning because he'll follow instructions, and I will not give central nervous system depressants to Wei Wuxian. Are the Prozac and the Wellbutrin different?"
"Yeah, a bit different. Uh, just trying to remember.... Prozac is an SSRI - uh, serotonin something re-uptake inhibitor, basically it causes your brain to have more serotonin and for some reason that makes people less depressed and anxious. It's one of the first antidepressants discovered, I think? It's very safe. I think the most common side effect is, uh, sexual, as in, it, uh, lowers people's sex drives. Which is usually inconvenient but I guess doing sex things in here isn't a great idea to begin with, because, you know -"
Vague gesture. This is so awkward she did not sign up to give sex ed classes to teenagers.
"Wellbutrin is, uh, a different newer class - I think it has slightly more stimulant effects, so it can help more if someone's main symptom is low energy or lack of motivation or whatever, instead of being sad or anxious?" Wow she REALLY wants her pocket pharmacology reference book. Maybe if she's really nice to the void wall it'll give her something useful. "It's also used for helping people quit smoking, for some reason, it's supposed to help with cravings for nicotine? Dunno why. I think it's one you should take in the morning and not the evening, because of the stimulant part, it can mess with sleep."
"Don't worry about sex. No one in the Shanghai enclave would do the heterosexuality. --I'm not sure if I should give the Wellbutrin to Wei Wuxian because he needs to stop being addicted to things or not because he needs to have less energy."
"Uh, who's the third person? I think a factor for the Wellbutrin is that it doesn't help with anxiety and might make it worse, and I think probably a lot of people who had, uh, bad parents problems, might be anxious a lot? ...It's not that strong a stimulant, you could maybe just give him one day's worth and see if it makes him, uh, too energetic."
She nods. "Wellbutrin for Wei Wuxian. He has never been anxious. --Jiang Cheng is Wei Wuxian and Jiang Yanli's brother. He is worse than Wei Wuxian at the languages and the fighting and the artificing. His father loves Wei Wuxian's mother and doesn't love Jiang Cheng's mother, so he favors Wei Wuxian and neglects Jiang Cheng. His mother is angry that she can't prove she's the best by having the better children."
"That sure does sound like a really awkward case of, uh, bad parents." She's not quite sure what else to say. Just awkwardness all round.
"It is not good. I am glad to help. --I won't give a pill to Meng Yao. He takes the potions that affect his brain, I don't know how they would mix together."
"....There are potions that affect your brain? What kinds? How do they work?"
"Any kind you can think of. To erase the memory, to make you feel an emotion, to make you creative or focused or more intelligent. His affinity is the mind."
"Whoa. That's super cool. I bet the potions for being more focused would be popular here."
"They are a, what is it, double-edged sword? It makes it harder to notice the mals. --I do not understand this phrase. All swords have double edges."
Marian snickers despite herself. "You're totally right, they do! I hadn't actually thought of that. It'd make more sense if the phrase were, like, a double-edged kitchen knife? ...I guess that sounds silly though. Anyway. You got any more medical questions right now, or should we just, uh, plan a time to cover more stuff?"
"Sure, you're welcome to it! Uh, keep in mind that it's out of date and we know a lot more now about bodies and cells and stuff. Feel free to make a list of questions for me later, if you want?"
She picks up the book. "Don't believe her," she says. "You're a very good book and you have so many facts in you. I bet you're going to teach me so much. I'm very grateful you decided to show up."
- wait what.
"Uh, do books come to life here too?" Marian asks. "Even if they're not books about magic? Do you need to, like, be nice to them?"
"Spellbooks will wander off if you're not nice to them. I don't know about Gray's Anatomy but I would like to be on the safe side."
"Makes sense." It's kind of cute, really. Maybe Marian will try sweet-talking the meds and supplies in case that stops them from turning evil and trying to murder her. "Good luck with it!"
Marian sees her out, and then goes back to organizing and laying out all of her supplies for later trades with students.