All his life, Raleigh has been painfully aware that he's living a life of luxury, on the backs of those less fortunate than himself, and that he doesn't deserve it. He didn't ask to be born privileged, but that doesn't excuse it.
He's the direct descendent of Silas Beckett, the incredibly gifted wizard who almost singlehandedly founded the Sacramento enclave - according to his grandma's stories, at least, he takes that part with an enormous grain of salt. His grandfather, Alfred Beckett, is a prodigy at artificing and personally made most of Raleigh's gear. His parents had fertility trouble, and his older sister died in her sophomore year when Raleigh was eight, leaving him as Alfred Beckett's oldest surviving grandchild, and since then his parents and grandparents have been pouring the entirety of their considerable wealth and resources into making sure he's as prepared as possible.
And he doesn't deserve it. He doesn't want the weight of their love and desperation and hopes and dreams, he doesn't want to be the focal point of carrying on the Sacramento legacy, and if he were a better person he would–
...he's not sure what, actually. He HAS to try his very best to survive, because if he doesn't it will break his parents' and his grandparents' hearts.
It's not that he's useless or incompetent. He's just...ordinary. No worse than the indie kids he's seen go in on maintenance track and inevitably die, but no better either. The best he can say for himself is that he's conscientious. He's never missed a day of training or slacked off in a lesson or cheated on his diet. He's no prodigy at languages, not like his grandfather, but he worked hard and he speaks four. He's good with people, in a lowkey way.
His chances are probably a little less than 80%, given his general mediocrity as a person, but he's got the best money can buy, and some poor indie girl from Canada is carrying in half his damned gear, so he'll be just as well-equipped as any New Yorker. The Lipovsky kids are, as far as anyone knows, still alive, and their awful father practically worships Grandpa, so he'll have their backing. They're decent kids, and they deserve to graduate way more than Raleigh does, and instead they're going to be taking risks to cover his back while he's a stupid helpless freshman, and Raleigh hates it but what else can he do.
He stays up for induction. Accepts all of his grandfather's solemn last-minute advice and requests to make him proud. He doesn't cry, and pretends not to notice his mother's tears when she hugs him.
The induction nausea is awful but it's still preferable to standing their awkwardly with everyone's hopeful gaze on him and him alone, so he'll take it.