<...If you think you understand it, I am curious? My confusion is more about him than about you.>

- what about him is confusing? I won't necessarily have more than an informed guess for you, though. 

<I am confused why he was not at all interested in this yesterday but was today? And - why he said the things that he said to you. What generated them as something he wants in the context of - doing sex things - which does not seem necessarily related to strategic alliances, but I cannot quite imagine a me doing things unrelated to that...> 

I dunno why he wasn't interested yesterday but my best guess is that he has his pick of pretty faces and I come with unusual complications and so on net I wasn't interesting until we fought, and then girls that can fight him are unusual enough than then I was more interesting.

I don't know exactly why he wanted to talk about my feelings. That part's not usual. I would've expected it to make more sense to you because of the similarities in personality. If I cared about that it'd be - not particularly enjoying being acceded to, rather than being chosen, but I don't think men typically care about that much. ...men typically have a wider variety of situations in which they're motivated to have sex because it can't ruin their life.

<...My guess extrapolating from myself would be that he - wants to engage with you as an equal? That this is...something he needs, in order to feel any actual closeness or intimacy, and...that that is something he needs to enjoy sex?> 

- huh. That seems like it'd be hard to come by, in his position. Equals, I mean. Especially if you mostly want girls who aren't yet 30, and my understanding is that powerful men mostly do.

<...I am not sure why powerful men mostly want that, or whether those reasons would apply to a me. I...do expect that the thing he wants is hard to come by, for him. He seems lonely.> 

Uh, I think men are attracted to women who look likeliest to get pregnant. Since that's what attraction is about, right, even if Ma'ar and I both know I won't carry a child for him, at the core it's about getting women pregnant.

<Huh.> Mhalir isn't sure what to think. 

Ma'ar is not currently reading either of their minds. He's holding Carissa, and thinking that he's glad, and this was nice, and also something still hurts and maybe it even hurts more, now, than it did before. 

( - starship fire on cities - fragments of memories held in ashes - ) 

It is sweet of him, to be snuggly; she'd have more feelings to manage if he'd left right away. She holds him, and pets his hair, and doesn't say anything, and eventually falls asleep.

Ma'ar falls asleep holding her. 

- he has nightmares, over the course of the night, but he isn't that loud about it. 

She's awake by then, and studying magic, but there's nothing obvious to do for him and she might get blasted in the face for trying, so she leaves him to it.

As usual he sleeps a lot longer than them. Eventually he wakes up, rolls over. Slips his arm around Carissa. (Reads her mind to see how she feels about this.) 

In between books on magic she has catalogued all her feelings so she won't make the really stupid mistake that every woman is warned against, of slipping into living in a love story instead of in reality. There are lots of things that might happen in the morning; he might charge off home and be distantly courteous should they ever meet again, he might want to go again and then do that, afterwards, he might stay affectionate, he might want things. All of those situations would be okay. She does not need anything from him; she will not get slipped into providing whatever looks likeliest to prolong the nicest illusion. 

She leans into him, when he wakes up, and keeps reading her book, and crosses some scenarios off the list while trying to be pretty indifferent between the remaining ones.

This is all right. It's not really new information, in one direction or another; she's being appropriately careful, given her priors, and he can appreciate the skill going into that, even if he wishes the environment that created those priors had been different. 

He kisses her, and then says apologetically that he had better go check in with his people now. 

Of course. The ship is probably too far out for a Gate now but Mhalir can tell it to go in. She should probably also ask if they're needed, today, but she'll let Mhalir ask that so she doesn't sound desperate.

Mhalir can direct the ship in close enough for Ma'ar to Gate down, or just send a shuttle down for him if that's easier, and he'll ask if they're needed today. 

"Later tonight, I think," Ma'ar says, absently, his mind already moving ahead. "We can arrange a dinner reception for you to meet and talk with various people." Pause. "If that is all right, of course." 

Mhalir will check for Carissa's feeling on that before answering for them. 

That sounds good to her.

Ma'ar nods and gives them a time and then Gates himself down once the ship is in range; it's simpler than the shuttle, since he doesn't want to make a dramatic entrance. 

<Do you want to contact Urtho again?> Mhalir asks Carissa. <Or we could just read about magic until tonight, and wait for him to reach out to us.> 

I bet he'll forget he can do that. 

So Mhalir contacts Urtho to ask if he has more questions for them and would like them to come by during the day.