"Oh no, the horror? Can they not decide to leave Elysium and live in Asphodel, the fancy VIP lounge should not be a prison, that seems very dumb?"

"I am pretty sure they cannot," he replies, folding his arms behind his back and taking in the scenery. A blue butterfly that reflects the light a little bit weirdly, as if it's made of gemstones, lands on one of the broken stone statues up ahead, making the god smile. "That the barriers that surround the realms of the dead are impassable is the whole premise I am challenging, here, isn't it."

“True! Just. Ugh. What a shitty VIP lounge, a home shouldn’t be a prison. That’s not how homes work.”

"I think the idea is more that Elysium is a home... realm... I mean, while they're alive it's not like they can leave Greece, right? There's nothing else, there's nowhere else to go. Well, Olympus, and here, but you know."

“Mrrrrh,” she grumbles. “I think I want to better understand the constraints here so I can implement better fixes.”

"Father would... well, no, Father would not, Nyx would say that Elysium needs to be better than Asphodel and Asphodel better than Tartarus so that mortals have something to aspire to to not make their lives miserable to each other."

“But better is such a relative term! It varies for different people. Yes, broadly speaking Elysium can be better and more impressive and have more cool people to talk to and be more as an incentive for people to be better in life, I guess. It’s kind of comparatively easy for it to be better anyway, since it sounds like there’s much less people. But what about the ‘great’ people that want a quiet retirement with their family and loved ones?”

"I think the term is usually only applied to heroes and the like. Kings."

“Do their loved ones come with them to Elysium?”

"I... think arrangements can be made, but not by default, no."

“What excellent motivation to be great, never see anyone you love ever again if they were not also great, surely this is an excellent reward that mortals should aspire to in order to be better.”

"Theseus did not seem to mind," he grumbles.

“Who?”

"Old king of Athens, great warrior, killed the Bull of Minos to get something or other from the king of Minos, and now they're boyfriends."

“Oh. ... Wait, did the princess of said kingdom give him some yarn to find the Minotaur, and then did he ditch her on an island the minute everything was solved? I suppose being gay is a decent enough explanation for not being interested, but the most I remember from that myth is how much of an ungrateful asshole the hero was.” Pause. “And also that the queen had sex with a bull in a bull costume. That was also pretty memorable.”

"I... suppose you will have to ask him about the details. The yarn seems plausible, though I am not sure what that... word... 'gay', that sounds like Greek but I don't think I know that word."

“Preferring the same sex in a carnal fashion. Instead of preferring the opposite sex, being unconcerned with the whole premise, or somewhere in between all three.”

"Oh. Is that... a thing mortals do?"

“Yep! Lots of variance of preference, lack of preference, and libidos.”

"Huh. Wait, is that also why they do the thing where they only have one partner forever?"

“... no not quite, monogamy versus polygamy are related, but different. But we’re reaching the limits of my ability to educate you on these topics. I was in my mid-teens when I was eaten by my book, so, like. I was just starting to pay attention to things of this nature.”

Blink. "Mid teens, isn't that when mortals are about to get married or something?"

“Oh, ew, no. I mean, yes, probably, in your Greece. But in my world, that’s waaaaaay too young to be permanently tied to someone. And. Trying to have kids. Ick. No, it was like, experimental awkward dating phase where nobody knows how it works but they’re all pretending at each other.”

"You're an interesting mortal-turned-god, you know."

“Thanks. Though it’d be kind of impressive if I could somehow manage to be boring, being a mortal-turned-whatever-I-am from another world that’s similar but much more technologically advanced and with an entirely different culture. Because, uh, how.”