if my life is hardly worth the cost | Glowfic Constellation

Tomorrow what.

try-it-anyway

Tomorrow we can talk about doing more things than playing with each other's hair. And then do them. If you want. He's still not sure if he's going to want to set a different limit for himself; it'll depend how he feels in the morning.

That sounds lovely. Another ghost kiss. I will hold you and sing to you, I think.

try-it-anyway

Telumë smiles, and closes his eyes, and relaxes completely.

I might test that tea Foundation knew about that supposedly might make my hair more sensitive, he says finally. By myself, just to check that it does not have any horrible side effects.

But what if it has side effects that make it unpleasant to be all by one's self.

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I am sure I can manage. At worst he can just sing himself to sleep.

All right. And he sings to him and holds him and occasionally runs a finger along Telumë's jaw, not quite touching him.

try-it-anyway

He stays there until the sun is low in the sky.

"All right, I think I want to be alone now," he says finally, with some reluctance. "I love you."

"I love you. See you tomorrow."

try-it-anyway

"See you tomorrow!"

And he sits down in his living room and has a small amount of the tea, and tells Foundation to intervene if he tries to go find Maitimo or ask him to come over or something.

...The tea, it turns out, does have some side effects that make being alone, and specifically being somewhere Maitimo isn't, kind of unpleasant. He feels very warm and relaxed and happy and he wants to cuddle and he can't, if he even tries a literal god is going to stop him. So instead he'll wander around looking at his tapestries, which are extra beautiful right now - watching the sunset through his window, it's the best sunset - going around and touching all of the soft things in his house - and eventually flopping in his bed, hugging his pillow, and talking to Foundation for at least an hour, mostly about how he loves everyone in the multiverse. (If Foundation thinks this is a weird conversation, they don't say anything about it.)

The next morning he wakes up very slightly fuzzy-headed, but getting up and having some food helps. He sits and thinks for a while.

Maitimo?

Yes?

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When are you free today? I miss you.

I will take a look at my schedule.

Huh, it looks like I was going to fight evil and end death and make sure all children everywhere have happy childhoods, but someone has already done that, leaving me at loose ends.

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Telumë giggles. Well, would you like to accompany me on a walk? I wish to see how the public flower-garden is coming along. They have an area with its own little weather-barriers, so plants from various other climates can be grown.

Sure.

He will meet him there.

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Telumë reaches for his hand. I missed you very much last night, but I was good and did not break the rule I had set and ask you to come over.

Oh good. I would not have come over, because we are doing all of our flirtation by very strict ethics these days and my model of Vanyel would shake his head disapprovingly.

try-it-anyway

Also I told Foundation to intervene if I tried that, so there were three levels of precaution against me doing something I would later feel unsure about. Anyway. I tried the tea and it was - actually rather nice - and would be much nicer with you there, I think. However, I do not think I can make any decisions once I have had some, so I had better make all of them beforehand.

My model of Vanyel is making a bit of a face but not yet shaking his head disapprovingly.

try-it-anyway