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Oct 01, 2020 6:27 PM
Warlock falls on Auradon
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Bruce is taking a walk in the woods this Saturday, avoiding everyone and speculating idly what's going to happen in his DnD campaign on Monday. Even if he had been paying more attention, he probably wouldn't've seen the sinkhole opening in time to avoid falling in. 

He wonders, as he's falling faster than he can scramble back up, if this is it, if God is tired of allowing him to live and he's being dragged down to Hell.

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He falls into a spiral galaxy about fifty times as large as he is, except the space between the stars is for some reason green.

The stars attach themselves to him until he is quite covered, and then explode.

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Okay, yup, he's super dead, nobody knows what the moment of going to Hell is like but this is definitely not him landing unharmed at the bottom of the hole. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

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Bruce falls through a well and continues to fall up for another thirty seconds before gravity suddenly remembered how it was supposed to work and made him fall flat on his butt.

He is in the middle of an incredibly beautiful forest:

There are no signs of any humans.

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This . . . is not everlasting fire, so relative to expectations it is the best surprise he has ever gotten. He sits very still for a while for fear that the non-fireyness of the situation will change if he does anything to it, but eventually curiosity gets the better of him and he stands up and starts walking.

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A mouse wearing a shirt and trousers climbs down from the tree and chirps at him. 

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Possibly he did land alive at the bottom of the sinkhole, just on his head. He really hopes so. "Hello," he says to the mouse, because there's no scenario he's aware of where that's likely to be worse than not saying it. Then he tries using prestidigitation to change the color of his watch strap, since if it works that's a little evidence that he's alive.

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The watch strap changes color!

...The mouse makes a frightened noise and runs back up the tree.

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"Sorry? I didn't mean to startle you." He really wants to know what the fuck, so he'll wait a bit to see if the mouse is going to come back and explain before he keeps walking. 

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The mouse continues to stay up in the tree.

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Okay, he'll just keep walking in his randomly chosen direction, then.

He worries for a bit that the mouse is going to tell on him to his parents about the magic and turns his watch strap back to hide the evidence, then realizes that that is not any of his top three problems and is probably just more evidence that he has lost all his marbles and the bag they came in. 

This forest looks potentially bigger than the one he was in earlier, and that actually might be one of his top three problems if it turns out to be big enough. 

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The woods open up into a glade, and there's a curlyhaired boy lying on his stomach reading a book and taking notes in a notebook. He occasionally reaches over to pluck a berry off a nearby bush and eat it. 

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Bruce stays hidden behind a tree for a while, watching. On the one hand, it doesn't seem too unlikely that the boy is a demon, given that he's in the middle of something very weird happening, and Bruce would really rather not interact with any unfamiliar demons. On the other hand, he looks like a normal human, and not a particularly dangerous one. And it's not as if he has any better ideas for finding out where he is. Possible doom or certain confusion, possible doom or certain confusion . . . 

Eventually Bruce steps out from behind the tree and says a very quiet "Hello?"

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aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

The boy looks around desperately for an escape, fails to find one, and says back "hello."

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"I'm sorry to bother you but can you tell me where I am? I'm very lost."

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The boy does not look any less uncomfortable. 

"You're in Riisitunturi Forest."

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"That's not in Iowa, is it." At least it sounds more like a human name than an Infernal one; Infernal has fewer vowels.

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"It's in Weselton. I don't know of an Iowa. --Uh, sorry about the weird question, but did you just fall through a well?"

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"I fell in a sinkhole. Is that . . . common?"

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The boy breaks into a grin. "You're from a different world! What is the government like there? Do you have a king or a parliament or a council or what? What kinds of catastrophic weather do you get? Do you have one calendar or lots of different calendars? Can you mass-produce your spells or magic items?"

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"--uh, sorry."

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"Different world? Wow, I thought that only happened in stories." He sure hopes that's it, it would beat the shit out of being dead or concussed. "Uh, we have a President but some places have kings or parliaments, we have earthquakes and tornadoes and hurricanes and firestorms and tidal waves and, what else, volcanic eruptions, and one calendar--it's the year of our Lord 2019." Better pretend to have forgotten that last one just in case.

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Bounce bounce. "I'm going to make first contact with a new world!"

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"--sorry. I'm Kaleva, Duke of Weselton. This is Auradon."

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Probably a demon would not bounce like that. That is some very human bouncing. "It's pretty exciting! Except I guess if this is a new world I'm supposed to save you all and I'm a really bad evangelist. Maybe I'm just supposed to get you in touch with people back home who are better at it." Or maybe this is the kind of story where he gets saved himself, but if he's supposed to be saving them then admitting he isn't saved isn't going to help so he had better not mention it. 

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"Save us from what? All the bad people are on the Isle of the Lost. How do you know you're supposed to save us if you didn't know you could go to other worlds?"

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