"It seems like something about the way we're talking about this isn't working. Is there some other angle that might work better?"

"I dunno. I don't - know what I'm supposed to be doing."

"The things that seem like priorities to me are - noticing your feelings about this, so they don't surprise you later, and having a plan for how to have interactions with your husband go well."

"I feel - sad and hurt and like I should trust him a lot less going forward.

"I don't know what sort of plan I should have. I don't know how to make things go well. I don't know what I did wrong, I can't - 'just don't cry about things' is not actually a feasible plan, you know - "

"Those seem like reasonable ways to feel. 

Do you think that you two had different expectations last night in some way you could've talked about?"

"I dunno. Probably."

"It's really hard, though, to try to solve a problem by talking more if sometimes your husband insults you."

"I guess."

"I think I want to try something where I say a lot of things and you tell me which of them sounds the most true. Because it seems like you're having a hard time today with saying a lot yourself. Would that be okay to try?"

"Yeah. That sounds good."

"Your husband reacts badly when he's angry and the situation around sex makes him angry, so you can't expect any good reactions from him about this topic.

Your husband reacts badly around sex in particular, even if he might handle anger well at other times, because an heir is so important for Osirion.

Your husband reacted unusually badly last night compared to how you can expect him to react going forwards."

"First one."

"When your husband is angry you feel like he might hurt you, or have you hurt. 

When your husband is angry you feel like he'll probably say cruel things he doesn't mean and will regret the next day. 

When your husband is angry you feel like he'll probably say cruel things he does mean."

"Third one right now, but if it goes on long enough then it might end up closer to the first one."

"He might hurt you by having sex with you even though this hurts you. 

He might hit you or shove you or throw things at you.

He might hurt you using magic, or order you punished under Osirian law."

"First and third."

"The best solution is to talk to him and help him understand that his behavior is hurtful, so he changes his mind.

The best solution is to try to avoid him and hope he does not want to work on your marriage. 

The best solution is to try to have interactions with him that don't make him angry or frustrated."

"Third."

"If you are careful to praise him and act grateful to him and tell him you love him when he is not hurting you, that will make him happier.

If you are careful to demonstrate to him that you are obedient and will do what he asks of you, that will make him happier. 

If you are honest with him and talk with him about how you feel and what you need, that will make him happier."

"I don't actually expect any of those things to make him happy."

Nod. "Do you have some other ideas?"

"I don't know how to make him happy. It seems like a misguided thing to even try to do, really."

"Do you have ideas about how to make him not angry and frustrated with you?"

"...don't ask for things. Don't have preferences. Don't criticize him. Don't act frustrated back. Stop - caring so much about what he thinks of me for other than strategic reasons."

"What do you think would happen if you tried that?"