Bruce Banner has just returned from his lab, where his latest experiment came out really well. He should go straight to bed, because it's six in the morning, but he can't seem to become the right kind of tired, probably also because it's six in the morning. So instead he's watching the sun rise out the window of his cozy (tiny) grad-dorm single room.
If he would like to subject people to invasively sexual science experiments instead the Erogame is happy to accommodate.
As it is it is just weirdly easy to find hot porn.
The Erogame didn't say that where he can see it, so he can't remind it of the importance of consent.
How much weird porn does he have to read before his PRV goes up?
Yeah, he's definitely jerking off to this stuff. And then continuing to read it after he comes, because his taste in porn runs to the plot-heavy and he wants to know what happens next.
Sure it will, the reward is he gets to find out how the story ends. Hmm, how to raise LST, FUK, and ERO?
FUK is likely to be the hardest, since it requires finding someone else willing to interact with him in a sexual context. Maybe if he finds someone with really low standards?
Well, now that he puts it that way, the solution is obvious. People with really low standards, looking for sex, with a minimum of risk? Chatroulette. Even with his distinctly mediocre FUK, he can probably make someone's webcam jerkoff session better than a string of people ignoring them and wishing they'd go away.
Hopefully the game isn't expecting him to enjoy it much, though, since he's straight and the vast majority of people jerking off on chatroulette are guys. No, wait, his life is ridiculous now, maybe he'll immediately get a hot woman. Only one way to find out, though, and he's already got this incognito window.
He does not immediately get a hot woman!
He immediately gets a cute nerdy guy with glasses.
Is he very sure he is straight.
Hey, you don't have to be into guys to appreciate them aesthetically, and this guy is certainly aesthetic. "Hey."
"Hi!"
Cute nerdy guy blushes! It is a bit weird to blush when you were planning to jerk off in front of a stranger, but such is life.
"So, uh, this is my first time. On this website, I mean. So I don't really know what I'm doing." Godfuckingdammit, just because "arbitrary appendages can now fit in any of his orifices" does not mean he needs to eat his entire foot.
He should help, somehow, be an active participant. He can't quite bring himself to take his own dick out, but he can at least be encouraging. People who do this probably like attention and compliments and stuff. "You look really sexy, I bet you always get appreciative audiences," he tries. It's not super honest but not exactly a lie, either.
Thank you, sex aliens, apparently reality now grades on a curve and that's really convenient. And the guy seems to be enjoying it too. "Yeah, that's right, you're doing great."
This is not super great dirty talk but you know what? Random guy on ChatRoulette is going to take it. At least it's not disgusted stares.
Turns out dirty-talking someone you aren't actually into and in fact don't know from a hole in the ground is really hard! And not the boner kind of really hard, the "I am super insincere and worried that that's obvious" kind.
Bruce doesn't know that guy's name and will never see him again and doesn't super approve of his life choices, but his disapproval still makes Bruce want to crawl into a hole. He signs off Chatroulette.
Also he feels kind of gross and wants a shower, but isn't sure if the Erogame will try to make him do sex things in the dorm showers and more sex things with people he doesn't like in that way is the last thing he wants right now. So instead of showering he pirates Shards of Honor and starts reading it while curled up in bed.
Oh right, real life is still going on under the layer of weird sex game and also the layer of badass space people. Bruce makes sure he is wearing a full complement of normal clothing and then goes and answers his door.
Quest available: Get Laid With A Little Help From My Friends
Help ??? Aarons get laid.
Success: +2000 xp, improved relations with ???, ????
Failure: ????
He gets to wingman for people? What a nice quest! So much better than the previous thing which in fairness was his own bad idea. "Yes?" He says, aiming it at both Lev and the quest prompt.
"Yeah, I was thinking about the methods we're using for measuring cognitive decline in aging mice--"
Lev has opinions about cognitive decline! Lev also looks less pervasively miserable than he does at essentially all other times.
Lev looking less pervasively miserable is great! Cognitive decline is kind of an inherently miserable subject but Bruce enjoys hearing Lev's opinions on it more than enough to cancel that out.
"Those are some good ideas! You know a lot of cognitive science for a biochem guy, I'm impressed." Bruce has suggestions for incorporating said ideas into their next round of experiments!