He just got aliens to modify his brain to make him better at fapping. What is his life.

. . . Weirdly nice, is what his life is. Or at least his orgasm.

Quest available: Rules of the Erogame

Increase FUK, SED, LST, PRV, BOD, and ERO by 1 each without using stat points; learn your first skill; level up. (You do not have to do this in the same action. Using your stat points now will not cause you to fail your quest.)

Success: +1000 xp
Failure: The Erogame will handhold you through more of your adventures. Maybe you'll stumble across a rulebook.

Apparently he's being encouraged to experiment, which is a good sign. He cleans himself up, accepts the quest by poking the little "yes" button, then puts three points in SED and the last one in FUK again. Now, how to raise those stats in other ways? Might as well start at the top; BOD runs on exhibitionism. He tries heading out into the dorm's common area, wearing just his shorts and a blush of oh geez people are going to judge me for being shirtless while ugly. Being told by a text prompt that he is "nerdy-cute" is not really as concrete as the obvious-to-him fact that he's pale as a sheet and mostly composed of gangling elbows.

There are a handful of people in the dorm common area. One of them is very conspicuously staring at her laptop.

+1 BOD for walking outside shirtless and running into someone who thinks you're cute.

This is fine, this is fine, he's been shirtless at the beach ever and nothing bad happened except sunburn. 

Someone in this room thinks he's cute. Or the game is lying to mess with him, that's always an option.

He looks at the girl with the laptop. Is she looking away because she doesn't want to look at him?  Or because she does want to look at him? The first seems more plausible but the second is pretty relateable. Maybe if he talks to her he can find out and also get SED? He should do that. He will do that.

After he ducks back into his room and grabs his shirt.

Okay, now he'll talk to her. Or at least he'll sit at the same table and blush some more, that's sort of like talking, right?

The Erogame does not appear to think that sitting at the same table and blushing some more counts as talking. 

The girl bites her lip and stares very very intently at her laptop. 

No, it really isn't, is it.

Social rejection can't actually be scarier than learning that the universe is some incomprehensible entity's sex experiment, but it is anyway. He screws up his courage and says, "Hello," at a higher pitch than he had intended.

"Hello!" the girl says. "Uh. Hi. I'm Sarah."

"I'm Bruce. Uh, what're you reading?" Stop staring at the table and look at her, Bruce, come on. At least long enough to notice what color her hair and eyes are and what she's wearing, even if actual eye contact isn't happening yet.

Her hair and eyes are both brown, and she has a shirt that says SCIENCE: IT WORKS BITCHES.

"Uh. I'm reading the Warrior's Apprentice?"

What a great shirt. (Bruce's shirt says "A day without fusion is like a day without sunshine.")

"Neat. Sounds like a fantasy book?"

"No! It's science fiction. It's by Lois McMaster Bujold." And she gives a quick plot summary.

"Cool, I love science fiction. Especially with really clever protagonists. I should read the Vorkosigan series sometime."

"Awesome! You should tell me what you think sometime."

Managing to have any sort of conversation with a person you know thinks you're cute has raised SED by 1!

The textbox throws him off a bit (and he doesn't know she thinks he's cute, just that the game is asserting it), but he manages to say, "I-I will, yeah." And now he has an excuse to talk to her again, as soon as he's read the book. Which makes him realize he's actually enjoying this conversation. So of course he has no idea where to take it next. "So, what are you studying? I mean, what's your subject?" Ugh, real smooth there dude.

"Climatology, actually. I want to study global warming."

"That's very practical. I'm studying the biochemistry of aging. Trying to make lab mice live forever, sort of thing."

"That's awesome! --Pretend I asked the question I should ask to get the most interesting response." 

Oh, what a good way to phrase that. He grins. "Then I'll pretend you asked me how I know anything I do to the mice is relevant to humans, and the reason is . . ." he happily burbles on about immune systems and genetic similarities and feedback loops for a solid two minutes.

Sarah listens and asks intelligent questions!

Bruce gives intelligent answers! He also asks about Sarah's work. He imagines climatology involves a lot of mathematical modeling, what's that like?

Sadly, the author of this thread is not capable of discussing mathematical modeling, but Sarah can, and she has many opinions about it!

The Erogame wishes to draw Bruce's attention to the fact that Sarah has breasts of the sort a video game developer would look at and go "that's a bit unrealistic."

The Erogame can, in fact, draw Bruce's attention thusly. He appreciates this fact quite a bit, even. She doesn't just make excellent models, she would probably make an excellent model.

Oops, now he feels like a jerk; her eyes are up there dammit. He ends up alternating between eye contact (yikes), boob-staring (double yikes), and looking down at the table (sigh). At least she hasn't called him out on it; maybe she hasn't noticed. 

She is smiling a little bit at a private joke! Maybe it is about his breast-related struggles.

Ugh, probably. Better stare at the table some more and keep asking intelligent questions. She's a fellow scientist, damn it, not a pair of tits.

Soon he finds himself failing to totally fight off a massive yawn, and blushes again. "I'm sorry. Your research is fascinating, but I'm on forty hours of sleep-dep. I should really crash before I have to go back to the lab again." Also, sleep might cure him of the hallucination that this erogame thing probably still is.