When Sasha is walking home from school, he stumbles across the smallest and most adorable dog in the world.
"I am glad Sasha has two people who can appreciate how excellent he is. He should have ten."
"That's adorable but I am not at all sure I can handle having ten boyfriends."
"I'm almost one hundred percent sure that's not how the alignment chart works."
"Dungeons and Dragons thing. The axes are good versus evil and lawful versus chaotic, it's usually drawn as a chart with nine squares, like so —"
"Five of those boxes aren't real and four of them are how extraplanar entities work."
"It's generally used as a way to describe personal philosophies rather than a way to describe physical reality. Extraplanar entity?"
"Angels and demons and fairies and djinn. Angels are good, demons are evil, fairies are law, and djinn are chaos."
"Some nonhuman species have-- alignments?-- too. Vampires are evil, unicorns are good. But lots of them are like humans and can be more than one."
Hearing himself described as unable to be anything but good is deeply, deeply weird, in a way that he's not sure he can articulate even to Sasha.
"But it's different for Earth species. Like, demons actively pursue evil, and vampires often... devote themselves to poetry or spending fifty years making bonsai trees or something, and just incidentally don't mind murdering people when it seems like a good idea."
...is there any way to get the girl's attention without getting the attention of Sasha's least favorite extraplanar entity?
Sasha waits until they're handing papers forward and then hands her a note that says Are you okay?
He doesn't try doing that again but he makes a note to keep an eye on her.