When Sasha is walking home from school, he stumbles across the smallest and most adorable dog in the world.
"Well, we already know Lilith is dangerous, and Asher didn't kill you even though he totally could have. On the other hand, vampires murder people and Lilith doesn't seem to want to do that. And Lilith doesn't know how to control her fairy magic, although I don't know what column that goes in."
"I think I'm just scared of 'bad things happen to people she's pissed off at in unpredictable ways and there's no way to reliably avoid making her mad because she could make a request at any time' more than I'm scared of 'did a thing that was objectively incredibly sketchy but deliberately and conspicuously did not deal me lasting damage even though be totally could have.'"
"I expect he wants to suck your blood again, that's the obvious reason he wouldn't have killed you. Or he's worried about vampire hunters."
"Even so." He looks down at himself. "I'm not dizzy anymore but I think my streak of having all my math homework done is going to be broken, adding more mind control tonight feels like a bad idea."
"Seems reasonable. --We should get you a holy symbol to carry, vampires are weak to holy symbols."
"Holy to me or holy to the vampire? I have a star of David I don't usually wear but I don't know if holy is really a concept I use."
"It has to be something you have true faith in. Doesn't have to be religious, you can ward off a vampire with a wallet if you have true faith in capitalism."
He thinks about it.
"Yeah, I think a symbol of faith isn't going to work very well for me."
"They're weak to silver and fire and stakes through the heart, none of which is very helpful. They don't like garlic but it's just because they have supersenses, you can also ward them off with car alarms or flashing lights. They can't come into your home unless you invite them in. And Marlo can burn them by touching them."
He nods, and then takes his jeans off and curls up in bed. "Thank you."
"...probably he'll just want to eat you again?" Leo says uncertainly.
Leo sings.
(You're warm and safe and okay. It's time to rest now. Close your eyes and relax and drift away. Everything is all right. Leo is here.)
Yeah. Leo's here.
Sasha sleeps, and dreams of something that reaches into his mind and twists until he can't even imagine not loving it, dreams of Marlo with his eyes glassy and his mouth fallen open, dreams of being bitten and drained again and again and squirming desperate for more under Asher's hands.
So that was fun and he's not hungry anymore, but he still has an entire night with nothing to do. He checks in on Sasha; Sasha seems to be doing fine. But he should wait a night for the Sunnydale syndrome to kick in before he tries anything. Also, humans need sleep.
He spends the night dancing and thinking about physics, is incredibly patient all morning, and in the afternoon heads towards Sasha.
Sasha's at the park, sitting on a picnic table with his head on Marlo's shoulder and holding a half-eaten ice cream bar.
Jesus fucking christ that's a unicorn.
He totally just fucked the unicorn's boyfriend.
Fuck.
He approaches Marlo with his hands up in the I'm-not-armed position. "I am so, so sorry, please don't kill me."
"A vampire just walked up to you and is begging you not to kill him. Hi, Asher."
Unicorns can hear lies. His best hope is to confess everything and throw himself on the unicorn's mercy and hope he gets the benefit of the doubt because he didn't actually hurt Sasha.
"I definitely would not have eaten your boyfriend if I knew he was your boyfriend. I am very, very sorry."
Leo squirms out of Sasha's pocket and readies himself to bite Asher's ankle if it seems like he's going to pull anything.
aaaaaaa he is going to die. Again.
"--I want to point out that he is not permanently harmed and he definitely enjoyed himself the entire time."