"Anonymous ethernet posts it is, though that'll make it harder to be taken seriously. I'll let you know if anything results. Do you have, or require, a place to stay, local currency, meals..."

Sigh. "Normally, I have no physical needs per se. Here, I'm guessing I probably shouldn't push it and I should eat and sleep on a human schedule, and I assume you'd rather give me food and a place to crash than have me conjure it up. Back before the screaming had sunk in sufficiently I did try to conjure some local currency, it didn't work but pencil and paper did, but I will stop irresponsibly conjuring pencil and paper to write messages back home if you'll provide some."

"...what exactly are your normal powers?"

"As part of being the species I am, I can normally create arbitrary matter and am normally totally indestructible. I was not stupid enough to see how indestructible I still am but I don't, outside this universe, get hurt worse than 'scratched' or more than a little hungry or tired or inclined to inhale or whatever. Arbitrary matter has useful exploits like being able to conjure up things that I don't have to design or know very much about - the way I usually find alts is I try to make the complete works of the local version of whoever I'm looking for, for instance. My translation magic is still working apparently as normal but I haven't fiddled with it in any of the ways I normally can since I landed. I also wear a bunch of doodads which have properties ranging from letting me sense magnetic fields through my much-missed eidetic memory; these are all broken. Via the eidetic memory I can memorize spells of a sort one of my alts who is also my girlfriend composes; without eidetic memory she's the only person who can keep them straight but when they're working they let me turn into a bird and back, correct my balance issues - I've got a redundant balance issues solution cast on me which doesn't seem to have abandoned me so far - do visual and auditory illusions, heal, and teleport, including interdimensionally but that does have to respect adjacency of worlds. And technically not part of my powers but part of my general wherewithal is that I know things about a lot of technology, which I can normally conjure up."

"Technology's definitely not going to be safe here, it wouldn't surprise me if it does things worse than break. I'm sorry. I imagine it'd be deeply unpleasant to lose all of that suddenly.

Your forms of magic do not sound like they work anything like how ours does."

"I'm getting that sense. And yeah, the first thing I noticed was that my equivalent of whatever you go on the ethernet with was not behaving, although I noticed the eidetic memory was gone right after that. Do you have, like, a hazmats procedure for the technology or anything. It didn't catch fire? It just won't turn on?"

"You wouldn't want to leave it lying around lest someone do something absurdly dangerous like try to take it apart and see what it's made of - that's not safe to do even with things that do consistently work in our world - but if it didn't explode at you at once it probably won't do so now. Perhaps we can bury it. 

We use crystal balls to go on the ethernet. I can get you one and teach you how to use it - let me arrange for meals and a place to stay and changes of clothes and local currency and so on first -"

"Thank you very much, normally I would offer you some arbitrary material objects for your trouble, but, um."

"It is very much my pleasure. I am deliberately not considering ways in which, if we find extraplanar studies experts who can send you back home, we could exploit that to get a lot of people clear of here and somewhere safer - I would get squished for that - but I am allowed to consider that helping powerful people often ends up being rewarding in its own right."

Sigh. "We try. Unfortunately even speculating too hard about how to get anything done in this fuckup of a world is apparently dangerous, so. May be a bit of a delay if we come up with anything at all. I would also like pencil and paper. I'm not the only member of my species and conjuring arbitrary material objects makes a good interdimensional communication system and all it involves doing here is writing."

"Those can be acquired. If something happens to them on account of the universe guessing you're using them for interdimensional communication - not likely, but technically possible - then please stop and don't try workarounds."

And paper and pencils are brought, and a crystal ball, and he arranges for everything else.

And Cam writes - on paper - by holding a writing utensil - wow, his handwriting has deteriorated -

Attn: peal c/o mailer demon:

If I do not continue to update you at least once a day please attempt dismissal/resummoning. I do not expect to be able to conjure messages to me. This world is fucked up but I have located a local Findekáno -

"- oh hey what did you say your name was, you're not an Elf so I can't assume you're named the usual."

"Ferardrin."

"Wait, I thought that was your hubristic uncle's name?"

"I am named after him, yeah."

"That's weird. Sorry. Okay." Write write. whose name is Ferardrin, which was also the name of the (died young) local Fëanáro, he's named after him, probably for died young reasons. The Finwë whose name is the same is king of this here country. I couldn't get anything conjuring for alts but I was directed here by the cautionary tale of the Fëanáro, who provoked the universe, which apparently squishes people for a) hubris b) science. Accordingly DO NOT ATTEMPT TO EXTRACT ME VIA ENTERING THIS WORLD. Place broke most of my shit. I have no sorcery, no blessings, no eidetic necklace, and hit-or-miss conjuration I've been warned not to attempt further. Not pushing it on indestructibility. Allspeak's behaving and so is the grace for now (can't tell if that's persistent effect of Loki's grace or if it's Iobel's serving as fallback unless I try something that pushes it on indestructibility...) I have warned the Findekáno about the Melkor who may or may not actually even be here but apparently he'd fit right in with all the other evil gods, isn't that grand. I'm going to fact-find and keep you updated in shortish bursts.

And he shoots Iris a message asking about protocols for very very anonymous anonymity on the ethernet and explaining the whole situation, and then sends a more formal report to his father.

And Cam investigates the crystal ball. He kind of likes the crystal ball but it's not as responsive as his computer. Sigh.

Cam can get a primer on crystal ball use and ethernet access and forums where they might be asking about new evil god activity, and a map of the world so he can point out the places where it's unlikely there's anyone with ethernet and where this evil god might have settled, and some bios of epic adventurers so Cam can decide if he likely fits among their number, and geopolitics (not in much depth, but 'here's this or that kingdom here's the main species living there here's what to expect if you have to fight your evil god there').

And Cam takes notes. On paper. With a writing utensil. UGH. And he writes attn: peal c/o mailer demon on them. And when he gets tired he says "this is the part where normally I drink a cup of coffee and I'm good to go until the next cup but to play it safe here I should probably actually sleep."

"By all means. I will have someone show you to your rooms. We are lucky we do not have to play it safe by catering to needs far more exotic than 'sleep'. See you tomorrow."

"See you."

And Cam goes and sleeps.

And they search message boards for things that might be evil-god-related for a little while longer, and then sleep themselves.

And in the morning is there breakfast? ...which Cam doesn't make, wow, that's almost nostalgic.

There is breakfast! And an intrigued Princess Iris, who introduces herself and is told she also has Elf counterparts though he doesn't know them, particularly.

"We always come as the whole family, from Grandfather all down?"