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Tumunzahar makes Menegroth look like a contract project. Which, the Dwarves assure her, it was. The stonework is astonishingly careful and beautiful, silky to the touch up close while from a distance it gives the impression of stretching on forever above, a sky of stone with crystals for stars. Vast natural cave systems are connected by dozens of perfectly smooth, gently sloped broad stone pathways from which the fall, if she fell, would be several miles down. There are handrails. "We use those to move materials carts," someone explains to her, "we're not going to be reckless."
There's an amphitheater, a place where a hundred of the stone walkways twine around to create space for a hundred thousand people to sit in close proximity, and someone is giving a lecture or a demonstration at the base of it, the seats closest to him filled with eager, tiny, bearded Dwarf-children.
And they spiral down, and down, and down, past waterfalls and egg-sized gemstones left half in the rock and halls of crystal. Everything grows gradually more ornate and more perfectly maintained and the clang of hammers fades behind them. "People say," her guide says, "that we only have a council instead of a single King because there were nine winners of the competition to design the throne so we couldn't just select one person to sit it." And they push open the doors to reveal, indeed, nine thrones so elaborate it would be hard to choose between them, and nine squat bearded people sitting them.
purposeful_glory
Loki heals her. "How did - how did he get you to - the oath revision, what did he do -"
"He made me forget. He did a lot of things and all of them hurt and I was so scared but I couldn't get Melkor's attention and then he played around in my head and he made me forget meeting you, forget everything, and then he asked me to swear my vows again to the false Melkor and with the false Elves and I did because I didn't remember and I didn't know and then he put the memories back and I'd sworn two different things and I hurt so badly I couldn't think and I couldn't move and they wouldn't kill me and I kept begging them to except I"m not even sure they could understand me because it hurt so much I couldn't hear my own voice and then he said it was okay, because both Melkors wanted the same thing from me, both of them had the same orders for me, and so it'd be really bad if they ever disagreed but right now they didn't. Right now they agreed. They both wanted me to trust Loki.
And it took me a long time to - to start having thoughts that didn't get interrupted partway through by everything hurting, but eventually I did, and then he showed me some people he sent you to ask you to come get me back, and they died, and he said I could go around and apologize to their families, so I did that, and it took a while. And then he said that you were killing orcs now, you had to, but both Melkors wanted me to go back to you, so I had to do that. And eventually the Melkors were going to disagree on something so I had to tell you to kill me.
And I said that I didn't want to be dead, I might have said that when everything hurt but I didn't really mean it. And he said that I'd sworn to obey and my orders were to get you to kill me. He didn't say right away so I think I'm allowed to tell you everything first. And maybe help the other orcs, if they're still out there and scared."
And it took me a long time to - to start having thoughts that didn't get interrupted partway through by everything hurting, but eventually I did, and then he showed me some people he sent you to ask you to come get me back, and they died, and he said I could go around and apologize to their families, so I did that, and it took a while. And then he said that you were killing orcs now, you had to, but both Melkors wanted me to go back to you, so I had to do that. And eventually the Melkors were going to disagree on something so I had to tell you to kill me.
And I said that I didn't want to be dead, I might have said that when everything hurt but I didn't really mean it. And he said that I'd sworn to obey and my orders were to get you to kill me. He didn't say right away so I think I'm allowed to tell you everything first. And maybe help the other orcs, if they're still out there and scared."
purposeful_glory
"There's babies, here. Only babies. And the colony, if he left it alone after I killed the Balrog that was hiding among the escorts." Loki drops to her knees and hugs Vár. "I don't know how to untangle all that, I don't, I don't have a way to make you forget again, or - anything. I had one stupid oath trick and now it's gone and I haven't thought of anything else, anything that worked."
purposeful_glory
"The babies are all right. They were too young to have possibly sworn anything and some of the Men are bringing them up. I think your mind is probably being read and anything I show you will be seen -"
"Oh. Then I shouldn't go see them, in case he decides to attack them and get them back or something. I don't think he's scared of there being orcs who know about the true Melkor, though. I think he actually just took me because he's mad at you."
purposeful_glory
"That's what I thought too. And I'd already used up my way to get prisoners out. I fought him but I had help and he still didn't die."
"You don't have to kill me right away but you probably don't have very long. I can't disobey orders and my orders are to convince you and even if the other Melkor gave me different orders that'd just mean everything hurt."
purposeful_glory
"I don't want you to hurt. I could try to make convincing me impossible but then whoever's reading your mind could just update your orders. Is there anything else I should know?"
She bites her lip. "Not sure. It was a long walk, I might have forgotten - oh, Sauron says to tell you that you can still make any of the trades he offered before, and he'll update the orders so I can go."
purposeful_glory
"I can't do that. I can't trust him unless he's swearing and then I only mostly can't trust him, he'd still be able to tell you anything he liked about what Melkor said."
"I figured it was something like that when you killed everyone. I figured you wouldn't have done that if you could've done something else."
purposeful_glory
"I tried turning an orc into a werewolf in case it would grant free will. No such luck. Long shot to begin with."
purposeful_glory
What has Loki got on her - little dried fruit in her pockets, okay. She gives Vár dried fruit, and makes her a little bit of ice to suck on in lieu of having water on hand.
purposeful_glory
"Picked them up a while ago. I'd tell you how but I'm not sure he knows, yet. They're neat though."
purposeful_glory
"There's only a few of those here. I asked. I asked the Men too. Nobody's thought of anything. I think if Fëanor had had a better idea he'd have mentioned it back when I first brought you there. But in the long run he has every intention of breaking open Mandos and freeing everybody in it and so have I."
"Is that why the false Melkor's been giving everyone orders not to follow the call of the Elf-gods when they die?"
She sucks on her ice. "I don't want to die. I know that's the wrong thing to say to persuade you but it sounds like I don't even need to persuade you so I think I can say it."
purposeful_glory
Hug. "I don't want you to die either. And I have no intention of leaving you that way. And unless I think of something searingly brilliant -"