"Can't always tell, but with a name like Xilandricar and as randomized a look as that, that one in particular I'd bet on it."

"Oh, is that why that was? Huh. Okay, I'd been thinking that angels just... changed themselves cosmetically because they wanted to. I suppose they still do, but not that drastically and bizarrely."

"I can see how you'd think that in Heaven, and demons could manage it too, but what was your theory on why you'd get fairies looking like that one?"

"Didn't have one, I just thought it would be incredibly rude to ask, 'Why do you look so weird?'"

"Ah, I was always a really impertinent summoner. Somehow I managed not to learn about any of my various afterlife options until I actually got murdered though."

"I was really nice to mine. Or at least I think I was, I asked them if there was anything they'd like to do before I unsummoned them, that just seems like common courtesy."

"I let my demons talk," sighs Cam.

"...Is there, like, a reason why people don't usually do that...?"

"Oh, they're afraid we'll talk them into letting us steal their souls."

"That's not a thing that can actually happen, right? The - one demon I summoned, I let him talk. He was demonstratively terrible. But I've had like - no ill effects? So I am confused."

"It's complete nonsense. But even if summoners did tend to let me talk I probably wouldn't tell them, because - it comes up exactly and only when you've got a combination of a demon who's nasty and thinks that's a funny joke, and a really desperate summoner. And that combination doesn't get better if it's common knowledge that the souls thing is nonsense."

"Uh, future reference - souls are actually a thing in this universe," volunteers Tony. "Mostly not a stealable thing, though."

"Uh, how do you know they are a thing?"

"So I mentioned we have tons and tons of kinds of demons, right? One of those is vampires. Vampires can turn people into more vampires, in this kinda gruesome way where the person dies partway through, and then they come back a little while later as a vampire with no soul and the difference is kind of really obvious. Like they have all the same memories and everything but suddenly they're a way bigger asshole than they were before and really into eating people."

"Okay, that's disturbing, what does one do about these things?"

"They catch fire in ultraviolet light, which is pretty convenient, because - Jarvis, give us a blueprint for the laser pointers?"

A neatly labelled three-dimensional holographic diagram of a laser pointer specifically designed to produce ultraviolet light appears in midair in front of Cam.

"Carry around one or two of those, and if somebody grows fangs and tries to bite you—" he mimes pointing with a laser pointer. "I'd mass-produce these if vampires were public knowledge but they're not, the majority of human society doesn't know magic exists, and Iiiii am not well placed to change that."

"Well, yeah, but production isn't even the problem, it's that people don't know vampires are a thing. And a lot of the time they are really weirdly resistant to figuring it out, like to the point where I'm worried that if you demonstrated magic actually existing on national television a lot of people might still not get it, and I - don't have the kind of public credibility it takes to get past something like that."

"Also, if you tell the entire planet magic exists, you might get murdered."

Adana stares at Cam. "That was what got you murdered? You were responsible for revealing magic?"

Cam takes a bow. "I'm Revelation, pleased to meet you."

"Huh. Cool. I am extremely pleased with the results of magic becoming public knowledge, good job." Pause. "I should have had a pseudonym, bet I wouldn't have gotten killed if I had one," sighs Adana.

"Well. I mean. They obviously don't work perfectly."