"That room."

Knock knock?

Kan Neli! "Pelape! Hello."

"Hi - awwwwww what's the baby's name -"

"Malo." He beams at the baby. "He's so tiny - I forgot how tiny they are - sweet tiny baby, we're going to fix the world up before you're old enough to notice, aren't we..."

"He's so so so little! - uh I actually knocked because Michael referred me to you to find out what's going on."

" - ah huh. So a week ago a wizard slipped a love potion to the owner of a shop in Himlin. Aitim's security had been told to look for and escalate stuff like that, they did, Aitim called the wizards, wizards took him down, we interviewed him for aggravated assault and attempted rape."

"Eugh. It's a pity Occlumency is so time-consuming."

"I know, right? So Aitim told the judge not to hang him - with the agreement of the victim - because we want word to get out to wizards, in general, and this guy getting eventually rescued would serve fine for that. So he got two of our years and a sterilization and an order to cooperate with the investigation. Except it turns out the guy is a special kind of wizard who can turn into an animal, and does that to escape sterilization, in front of half a dozen people and a couple security cameras."

"...I guess whatever they do to Statute violators is not as bad as sterilization. Although you'd think he could reverse it if he wanted."

"Might've been the principle? I think I'd find it completely horrifying and we already have all the embryos banked. Not that he has my sympathies, we may sterilize for too many things but 'rape' sure as fuck belongs on the list. Anyway, Aitim gets the people in relevant stores to talk loudly about the whole situation so it occurs to other wizards that there might be consequences for their nonsense. And then this evening the memory wizards came to erase everyone's memories."

"It's so fucked up that they have a category for 'unforgivable curse' and memory charms aren't in it."

Shiver. "So when they come for Aitim he arranges for us to flee - but, of course, they might've been smart enough to ask him for a list of who knew before they erased his memories - and then he explains to them how the Internet works, and how badly they will fail to suppress this by memory charming people. And they don't wipe him and they go fetch the Chinese Minister of Magic to talk to him about this."

"Doesn't go so well?"

"Minister says that Aitim needs to stop arresting wizards for love potions and other such conduct. Aitim says no. Minister straight-up threatens to murder him on the spot. Aitim says that Anitam would probably overreact to that, possibly in a way that left Earth uninhabitable for a couple of decades. Minister does the mind-reading thing to verify this. Minister asks a bunch more invasive questions then vanishes."

"Yeesh."

"Ah huh. Aitim wants us safe. I think he'll probably be able to exercise better judgement knowing that we are, so."

"Right. Especially with a new baby. Oh he's so small."

Kan clings. "Sinkali was in labor while Aitim was talking to the Minister."

"That must've been terrifying."

Nod. "I wish Aitim had just said 'of course I'll stop arresting wizards, my apologies' but also how could we possibly..."

"Yeah."

"There are people who kink on it. If they want to fucking love potion people there can be a bar for that, they can go to the bar for that, I don't understand why this is hard - I do understand why this is hard, it's because they don't think we're people, but it should not be hard."

"Well, apparently Muggles don't have souls. As derived from our inability to leave ghosts, which is a thing wizards can do. - ghosts are insubstantial."

" - wow."