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"Well."

Pause.

"Shit."
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"Not delighted by that statistic? Well, currently neither am I," he says. "How would you like a bodyguard?"

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"I'd love one. Do you have a catalog? Or do I call the bodyguard agency on the phone and say 'one bodyguard, please, must know at least one form of martial arts, and please nobody nasty and bitey, that would indicate a conflict of interest'?"

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"Alas," he says, "I've only the one suggestion. And I'm afraid his CV is short and unpromising. Although he is probably better than you are at killing vampires in close quarters."

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"If you go around killing vampires at close quarters," says Bella, "I won't interrupt. Do see if you can convince them to do the face thing at some point during the fight, though, or I might be confused about who exactly you're taking apart."

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"In most cases you won't have time to be," he says. "And once they have crumbled to dust the difference is generally clear."

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"It generally is, yes. Very hard to get a human to do that."

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"But of course I need not kill them at close quarters if I don't want to," he says, and reaches into the inner pocket of his coat, and produces what appears to be a laser pointer. When he flicks the beam across the fingers of his left hand, there is a faint fleeting fluorescence and an instant, vicious-looking blister, like he slapped a red-hot wire. He holds up that hand for her inspection.

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"Clever," she says with open admiration. "They sell those online?"

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He returns the laser pointer to his pocket.

"They do not," he says. "You might find some in a mansion just outside New York. Or you might not, depending what the estate did with them."
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"...Why would they be there?" she asks. "DIY project someone was working on?"

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"Not quite, no. What do you know about Tony Stark?"

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"The name sounds vaguely familiar?" she hazards. "Stark Industries? He from that family? I don't pay a whole lot of attention to military contractor corporations. Didn't he die?"

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"He did," says Sherlock, with a smile that is the furthest thing from pleasant. "I suggest you look him up."

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"May do," she says neutrally.

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"Good night, Miss Swan," he says, and turns, and walks away.

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Bella watches him go, then goes back to painting the town with crosses.

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