"Objects with the described properties are not a thing I've previously heard of. We have different kinds of magic than that."

"Okay. Uh, good for you. Is that how you can turn into a dragon."

"A - well, dragonish - is what I am, a human is what I turn into," he corrects.

"Oh." Sigh. "- I have touched way too many artifacts."

"It sounds like that's a concerning state to be in!"

"Yes. It is. There are - at least - five. Probably more. It'd be a coincidence if all of them had drawbacks I could notice right away."

"Is there anything I can do to help—?"

"Um."

"...um?"

"Please don't freak out."

"...okay."

"One of the artifact effects I have noticed appears to have made me fall in love with the first person I saw it's really weird I'm sorry."

"That's - concerning. I am concerned. For you."

"It's a concerning thing. Is there anything I should be concerned about besides the part where I am subject to a mind-altering effect."

"Mostly that and - its logical consequences - like, normally the first thing I'd look into if I found someone from another world stranded on the bottom of this one would be getting them home, but this seems like it might complicate that..."

"I mean it doesn't - confer an obligation or anything - is there actually a way to do that -"

"Interworld magic is a thing, it's a bit obscure and I don't personally know any of the spells but I can look them up, what do you mean by confer an obligation?"

"...you don't have to keep me around just because I landed here and became magically in love with you? If you don't want to."

"...well, yes, that's true, but even if you'd landed here and not become magically in love with me, if you'd decided that you wanted to stay in Elcenia I would've put some effort into arranging that."

"I appreciate that."

"I feel like it's the least I can do, really."

"It's not your fault I got hit by a van full of improperly stored artifacts."

"Sure, but it's not your fault either, and I have more resources to apply to the situation than you do. Speaking of which, would you perhaps like to not be on the bottom of the world anymore, I can teleport you home and you can meet my mother."

"Sure, why not. Is it just me or is it very flat and featureless here?"

"—it's not just you, no."