"- well, but, we all were, and She didn't take our powers away. ... even when I hoped She would."

Oh no.

"Oh, Stasia. I'm so sorry. I think - I think the Goddess chose to punish Hulrun and not you, because Hulrun was the one making the decisions. In Lastwall, we have a concept of - what we call 'illegal orders,' things that nobody can rightly order you to do, things where if you are so ordered your duty is to disobey. I think Mendev does not have that concept. I think it's a - failure, on Mendev's part, because it means that sometimes good people are forced to either do evil or to break the law, are told to do evil when they have been told over and over again that their duty is to obey and have - no tools, to help them avoid evil. What you did was evil, I think, but the Goddess forgave you because - it was an evil that it is very very hard not to do, with no tools, when everyone around you is saying that it must be done."

For some reason the only thing going through his head right now is 'it sure would be great if this fort had a competent priest of Shelyn.'  Probably because it's true.

She swallows. Nods. 

"What are the things."

"Do you want to know which things are illegal orders in Lastwall, or here in the Crusade? The Knight-Commander does know the concept, but I don't know what the exact rules for illegal orders are here. They might be different, and - " and he can tell that she's not going to care, if some orders that are illegal in Lastwall are legal on the Crusade, she'll refuse them anyways. "...I will tell you what they are in Lastwall. And I can learn what they are here, and tell you that tomorrow, so that you're informed."

And he explains which orders are illegal ones, including the ones that aren't really applicable because Stasia is not a wizard, but which she might ever be in a position to object to someone else following.

Stasia listens attentively, and counts them off on her fingers, and looks grimly determined. "Thank you," she says. " - I'm sorry that I did evil things. I won't do it again."

"I am not very good at - talking to people who know they have done wrong, about how they have done wrong, and helping them forgive themselves. But I think it's important, because often people do evil unknowingly, or in a moment of weakness, or even willfully, and this doesn't have to - mark who they are forever, so if you ever want to talk about it - find me, or ask me to stay after channels, and I will try. In other circumstances I would recommend a priest of Shelyn, but - perhaps I'm judging the man too harshly. You would know better than I if this is one of Sosiel's strengths."

"I don't know him very well," says Stasia immediately. "He said he might repair the temple, which would be good, because we don't have as much floorspace as we should where the stonework's not safe to go near... - I'm not worried about me. Maybe I should be if Hulrun didn't go to Heaven but - that's not, it wasn't, I wasn't worried about that actually. When I was sure we were doing the right thing I didn't feel better and I kind of felt worse, and if it's actually an evil thing then that's - better - sort of.

But, I failed the Goddess and the Church, when I did evil things with the powers She gave me, and so I ought to apologize, and you can talk to Her. - you don't have to tell Her. I know She shouldn't answer, I did hear what you said about it being expensive. But it's the closest I can get, probably. 

- I don't have a knack for adventuring. The Knight-Commander took me out a couple of times and then he said to me I hated it and I said I did but I'd serve however I was needed and he said I should run the temple here. So I think probably I won't end up talking to Her myself."

"Well - I am glad you are not worried. The Goddess does hear your prayers, as much as mine - and you can tell Her yourself that you are sorry. The benefit of a commune spell is not that it helps the Goddess hear us, but that it helps Her respond to us. But you can pray, and She will likely not answer in any way because it is expensive, but She will hear you.

...And there is another spell, at fifth circle, for people asking forgiveness - we think it is much less expensive, unless the person has fallen like Hulrun has and is petitioning for their powers back. Usually before it's cast, there's - quite a bit of talking, about what was done wrong, and how to avoid those mistakes in the future. I think. I'm not actually trained for that part, myself. But if you want to talk about it and then, at the end, ask the Goddess' forgiveness and know that you are forgiven, that is also an option."

"With a fifth circle spell? Sir! That's Breath of Life, at fifth circle! If I die in front of you you can use a fifth circle spell on me and otherwise you had better not."

He smiles at her again. "As you command. Did you have any other questions?"

"I don't think so. ...well, none that are important."

"I'm not busy."

"What three mistakes did you think of, during the lesson."

"First, I would not have thought to teach these men their letters.  Second, I would not have done voices in the story, and likely lost some listeners for it. Third, I would have gone on at length about a fairly fine theological point about when to go and look for a different cause than the one you're fighting for now -

My problem, really, is that for the last few years of my life I have mostly only heard sermons whose intended audience is a room full of priests, and worse, theologians - and I would have tried to copy those. I really have no reference point for how to preach to common soldiers. It's a flaw of mine, but, as I said - I did not come here to preach."

She nods. "I don't want to say anything that's wrong, is the thing, and Hulrun thought that whenever I made things up they were horribly wrong, but now I'm thinking maybe at least some of the time he's the one who was wrong, and if I am you can tell me and I'll fix it. 

You're here so the Knight-Commander can talk to the Goddess and we can grow to be greater and more deadly than the Worldwound and defeat it and then be stronger than any Evil in the world and fix all of those too." Like Iomedae did, the Knight-Commander said. He refuses to come to the temple but she borrows bits of what he said for sermons.

"If I think you are wrong about something I will tell you and explain what I think is right and why, and you can explain why you thought the thing you said was right, and sometimes you'll have been wrong but sometimes, maybe, I'll have been the one who was wrong. I think - in addition to all the other people Hulrun did wrong by, I think he did wrong by you, by always correcting you even when he was the one making a mistake, by not listening to what you thought or why you thought it, by trying to teach you that obedience to the Goddess meant obedience to him."

...Stasia's thinking again. You can tell, once you've seen her at it; she gets a dangerous look in her eyes.

"If the Goddess gives an illegal order are you supposed to follow it?"

"No. I'd be tempted, in such a situation, to imagine that I was just misunderstanding what constituted an illegal order, or - missing some important detail that made it actually okay - but those would be mistakes. If the Goddess gives you an illegal order, you tell her, 'Respectfully, sir, that is an illegal order.' and I suppose that's all you do because she doesn't have a commanding officer you can report her to - "

Stasia's smiling, fiercely. "So Hulrun was asking something we're - not even supposed to surrender to the Goddess Herself -"

"Yes. He was."

"Thank you. - now I think I really don't have any more questions, even pointless ones."

"Neither of those questions seemed pointless to me - Have a good night, Stasia."

Talking to Sosiel did not help Aarind get oriented to the Knight-Commander's party at all. He feels as though there's some massive gap in his comparative theology, if Shelyn, goddess of redemption, thinks that Her priests should take advantage of drunks to 'teach them a lesson'.

...Perhaps now he's being too harsh on the goddess. One could come away with a rather poor impression of Iomedae, if one's primary exposure to Her was Hulrun. He's sure many have, even the Knight-Commander who knew Her when She was mortal. Perhaps Sosiel is the Hulrun of Shelynites - too powerful and in too important a position to renounce easily, He makes a note to write to the church of Shelyin in... He makes a note to identify where the Church of Shelyn is headquartered and write to them there, suggesting that Sosiel be recalled and replaced with another more orthodox priest.

The problem, he eventually identifies, is that Sosiel is not Lawful. He's used to interacting with Lawful Good people and - expected, unconsciously, that as a cleric Sosiel would be better at being Lawful than most others - When he makes it explicit he can see how that was stupid. Instead, he should start by talking to someone actually Lawful - not the hellknight -

In the morning, he knocks on Catherine de Litran's door.

"Eminence. What a pleasant surprise, what can I do for you?"

"Well, I have been trying to get to know the Knight-Commander's companions and advisors, as part of my diplomatic duties. I spoke to Sosiel last night..."