"Oh, so that's what wireheading is."

It sounds like a weird echo of something she might've fallen into without a crown - just watching and rejoicing in the story of the world without doing anything to help it.

(Did her other self the Angel manage to avoid that?  She doesn't want to ask - not just yet - it's too uncomfortable.)

"I mean I figured that the - failure of will - would be more...

"Not necessarily getting wrapped up in philosophy, as wrapped up in transcendence, certainty being an antagonist to revelation."

"...Funnily enough, I think that's actually something that's held in common between Light and Death.  As far as fundamental forces go."

"Something that... you can't put into words?  That's intuitively grasping something outside yourself?"

This's familiar too.  She thinks she's more comfortable with it.

She's also suddenly wondering what she'll be about to learn...  "Angel, what will our parents be like in Villarosa?  Our new childhoods?"

"Just like the rest of the world, you can plan it or you can leave it up to the worldbuilding team.  You've already said something about your father, of course, Lila, but not much.  Is there anyone you'd like to have reincarnate as your parents?"

She wonders for a moment if she should pick her real parents... but no.  She's left them much too far behind.

"Selma for my mother.  But only if... if she'll be happy.  Despite my heroic father dying and everything."

"...Yeah.  It's - like that.  At least, I think it is; I've never...

"I've had feelings about it, but it's not like I could experience it.  My homeworld was as mundane as it gets; this is all fiction I'm drawing from for inspiration.

"...Huh.  Speaking of fictional inspiration, I find myself wondering if the relationship between Light and Death is almost like the two sides of the Force from Star Wars.

"Anyway - yes.  That's...something that could steal you away, if it tried."

She pauses, catches her breath; continues with a lurch.

"As for the matter of requesting reincarnations for anyone else I know, or - specifying the traits of my ideal parents, modulo the narrative requirements...  I...am uncertain whether I dare try, lest I find out I don't like what I find.  ...And...mm.  Don't reincarnate anyone I know with me, who wouldn't want to come on an adventure."

"Of course.  Is there anything else?"

(Is her alt going to ask the question she's obviously wondering about?)

"I've got all the choices, I think... but I feel like I want to specify something more before I send myself into the world."

"I'm not done, but, Lila, you should get it out."

"I don't know what..."

As in, she doesn't know what she wants to specify about Villarosa.  Or how to ask her other self about her past.

"... Can I have good parents?"

(That's at least near it.)

"Of course.  And parents that're there for you."

... as her own original parents, the king and queen, usually weren't.  She likes to think they'd been doing their best.

She blinks back tears.

The other her understands.

"-- How did you get to be this angel?  How long did you reign?  How did you - work things out?"

The angel folds a wing around her alt.  "I reigned for... twenty-seven years, if you count since my enthronement, which I usually did unless I really needed to make a point."

Lila nestles into the wing, blinking back more tears.

She hiccups with a half-laugh.  "Of course.  That was when the story of your reign began - fighting Barvid beforehand was another story, even though you were legally queen then."

Wow.  Twenty-seven years.

"How... did that story go?  Was it good for the kingdom?"  Did you keep thinking of it as a story?  How did you make that work?

She nods, and then repeats aloud for her alt still snuggled in her wing, "Yes.  I knew I was doing good, and I was happy to lead that story.  And then when I died - while on a state visit to Panawan, but it wasn't their fault - I woke up here just like you did and got presented with an offer to become an angel helping with other people's stories.  I was happy to take it.

"And then I kept watching my kingdom afterwards for a while so I could see the aftermath of my story there, and most everyone agrees I did do good - everyone from the nobles to even the anti-monarchists."

So she somehow did reconcile being in a story with actually helping people?  But how?  "Are you sorry you died when you did, and you couldn't stay longer?"

"I'm not sorry I went there.  Avoiding visits like that would've risked worse relations with the other countries - less trade, or maybe even war."

She shrugs, and pauses, trying to parse out what her alt is really thinking.

"I learned I needed to think what would make my people's stories better.  Both then, and years in the future."

"So you weren't the protagonist?...  Just like you aren't now."

Huh.  Maybe that would work.  If so... she wishes she'd realized that before.  Hopefully tiny Rifner will learn better before he grows up.

...It seems that Alicia recognizes something in Lila's request, as well.  And would like to join the hug, if Angel Lila thinks it's a good idea?

"...It takes - a certain sort of person - to bear being the hero of everyone's story, not just your own.  I know I wouldn't dare cast myself in that role, not if it was - at all in question whether I could do the right thing.  Even with the world needing to be saved.  ...I'm better cast as a mad engineer, anyway."  Hopefully a bit of a joke will help with - whatever's going on here.

"You did that for - so long, with no evident plot armor like I'd need - and you're not a gibbering mess that never wants to do anything like that ever again, even though it killed you?  I feel like you're not giving yourself enough credit for surviving all you've done with your self intact - and especially your capacity to be kind.  So many wouldn't have."

She pauses.  Her voice softens.

"...You're not going to go through this alone again if I have any say in the matter.  Even if it costs me, I'm pretty sure I'm willing to pay.

"Not that I can really know which way I jump when the chips are down and there's things I can do - my life was fucking boring - but...

"I brought you here to begin with, and that means I've taken on responsibility.  And - I can't not try to fulfill my responsibilities.  They're.  Important, you know?

"...gods, of course you do, you ran a kingdom.  So please believe me when I say that I'm taking this - as seriously as you."

Of course she can join in the hug.  The angel's got two wings after all.

That hits Lila closer to her heart than anything she's heard since -- since Fraddir died, at least, before she won her throne.  Alicia understands so much.

She throws an arm around her.

"Thank you - though I did have plot armor; at least I thought I did - and I'm not your responsibility.  I'm choosing to join in.  I wouldn't choose anything else.

"And you're taking up the villainess's part - you'll need help too, and of course I will be there for you."

There are some things she wants to say to some of that, but - they're not important right now.

What is important, is - said in a choked-out, emotion-laden voice:

"...We work together.  For a better world."

...Group hug...

...Oh.  Now she's crying.

"...it's - important, to not be alone.  To have - allies, and friends.  People in your corner.  And I'm not going to presume, we've barely met eachother, still - but I hope that we will be, both now and in our ever after."