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this is an objectively stupid thread but I couldn't get it out of my head
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"Okay. Now, it could just be that that's where your body naturally lands, but it also could be that you'd benefit from getting more healthy fats and protein into your diet, so you can grow a little more. I have a big chart here that shows lots of different foods and how many healthy fats and proteins they have in them. Do you see anything you like to eat?"

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?????? "I eat any food? I like to eat fish and cheese and meat but not get meat except on holidays." Fish and meat and cheese are the things in the right parts of the chart that she can recognize.

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"Okay! Well, I'm going to suggest to your foster mom that she stock lots of fish and cheese and meat at home, and I think you should eat meat even when it's not a holiday, and it'll help you grow big and healthy."

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- oh, that makes sense. Iomedae had been confused about why Alfirin and not her had to look at the food chart and have requests made of Evelyn but they're worried Alfirin is undernourished, and no one could possibly worry that about Iomedae. 

 

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Next she'll take the doll's blood pressure and explain that this measures how much your blood is pushing against your arteries at each part of your heartbeat. If your blood is pushing too much, it could damage your arteries; if it isn't pushing enough, your brain might not be getting enough blood.

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"...you take my blood?" That is even more obviously dark magic than the urine.

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"- so, we are going to want to do some labs where we take your blood to make sure everything is healthy, but for a blood pressure test, we actually don't have to! We will put this cuff on your arm -" demonstration on the doll - "and it'll measure your blood pressure without taking any blood at all. It is pretty tight - that's necessary for it to work - but it won't involve any needles or anything."

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Iomedae knows 'needles'. She did mending in exchange for extra money for the people she travelled with. She is an utter disappointment at needlework but was nonetheless somehow better than all of them - 

- in hindsight obviously because they wouldn't have spent half their waking hours on it, fabric is cheap here. 

 

Taking blood with needles sounds unpleasant but that's secondary to the concern about what they do with it once they take it. "That too wait we know more about America?"

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Bright smile. "Maybe that's what we'll end up having to do about the blood draw! But for now, the pressure cuff? It won't hurt at all and it doesn't take anything except measurements."

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"Okay. Pressure cuff."

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Both girls have very healthy blood pressures! That's great! 


The next thing they're going to do is a complete physical exam, looking at their bodies to make sure that they look healthy, don't have any scrapes and injuries and so on. First, do they both feel healthy? Are there any motions that are painful to make or any recent occasions where they've bumped something?

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"Martin grab my breast and my neck but I stab him very fast and there no marks."

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Evelyn did warn her about the attempted sexual assault but yikes. 

"Okay. And nothing else in your body has been hurting you, or feeling out of the ordinary?"

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"I fall down all the time on bike?"

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"Right, see, that's great to know about! It's not a big deal, but one of the things we are looking for is scrapes and scratches and whether they've been appropriately cared for. You should wash out any injuries you get on your bike that are deep enough to bleed, and always wear protective gear - helmet, armpads, kneepads."

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In civilized places you just ride your bike around all day and then go to the church at dusk.

Iomedae is aware she's just proposed a definition of 'civilized places' that it may be no place on two planets meets. Well. Aroden is the god of civilization; cherished, where it exists, and built, where it doesn't.

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"Would you girls prefer the other leave the room for this part, since we are asking you to take your clothes off?"

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"...and?"

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"...Why does that matter?" It's not like there are men present.

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"Well, okay then! Some people don't feel comfortable being naked in the presence of other people."

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That would explain why all Americans have separate washrooms. "Is fine."

 

She strips.

 

She is an impressively muscular, strikingly healthy looking young woman who has some scuffs on her knees and elbows from biking and an Eye of Aroden meticulously carved into her chest just below the collarbone.

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UM

 

Evelyn had not in fact known about that! What the fuck???!!! 

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Alfirin takes off her clothes. She looks like a slightly malnourished young woman with no noteworthy scars and is staring at Iomedae's chest because she did not know Aroden was like that.

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"- can you tell me about those scars on your chest?" says the nurse, with the fake bright smile.

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Oh. 

 

Americans are going to be unreasonable, aren't they. 

 

"I'm not comfortable answering questions about my childhood when you're in a position of power over me," she says, with meticulous precision.

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