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orf rebecca gets up to shit
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In a hole in the ground there lived an orf.

The hole in the ground is called "Angband". It is not a nice hole. However unpleasant a hole you are imagining, it is probably worse than that.

The orf knows how to live in this hole. If she waits until the blacksmith from division 209 is in a good mood she can sit in her smithy and watch sparks fly, bright and hot against the darkness. If she's well-behaved and submissive and quick and clever she can pretend to be an Elf, a real Elf or an imaginary one, for some hapless prisoner whose plot arc needs more personality diversity or a few extra facial expressions in a crowd scene, and get memories of that Elf or at least a skeletal backstory and add precious songs to her repertoire. If she goes down this staircase when a mission's gone well then she can get roughed up by Weird-Ear's squad and look battered enough that nobody else feels obliged to make up the difference for a week, but Weird-Ear doesn't mind getting her turned on first so it's much better than running into somebody with more refined sadistic tendencies. If she goes up two floors and over half a mile of dicey corridor navigable only by copious mindreading she can visit the spot where her mother died, but she doesn't usually do that. If she gets a scar that doesn't seem like it'll fade she can get a bit of the kind of white rock that makes scratches on the black stone of the fortress and show the tattoo artist from division 447, three hours' walk away, how she wants it neatened up and colored in or scarified - she's got a waterfall of overlapping circles burned into her shoulder, spirals up her calf, a field of bowing wheat scratched in over the whip marks, shooting stars down her temple from when she visited the blacksmith in a bad mood and she grabbed her by the hair and held her face near the sparks till she'd apologized enough.

If she goes alllllll the way up, and avoids the guy who likes feet who'd make it hard to walk back and avoids the Balrogs who are too hot to even get near and avoids the entirety of division 192, she can find Thuringwethil even when they aren't working on the same hallucination together! And she can bow very very deep.

"Milady."

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The orf looks uncertainly between them.

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"Trying to figure out how likely it is that someone intended this, which doesn't of course mean you were an informed agent of theirs."

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Nod.

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"I - don't think anybody knew how spacey I get when I'm hurting enough to say things to make it stop - most orcs don't know how to do private thoughts but I do - milady Thuringwethil tried to convince me it was a bad idea when I went to bribe her for help -"

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"Yeah. With the song and distracting his lordship. I'm not sure if she had to help to get me the part but I asked for that too."

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"You should say 'Thauron', people won't know what you mean. Why'd she help if she thought it was a bad idea, did she say - "

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"She said it would be fun."

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"Who's Thuringwethil -"

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"One of the Maiar. The nicest one. She does bats and stuff."

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"What bar does one have to clear to be the nicest Maia in Angband -"

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"Well, not much of one but she's also nicer than most orcs."

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"Is that bar much higher?"

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"Yeah - the orcs would all hate you, they swear to, but I'm not an Elf, most of them are fine unless they've got orders otherwise -"

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"I wonder if we could get anywhere by asserting we weren't Elves."

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"It would be pretty obvious bullshit but maybe enough for some of them to pretend to believe you for a little bit."

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"Even if we sang your look-like-an-orc song?"

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"Yeah, that would help. I still haven't taught you it."

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"I'll confess curiosity but it will be a little tricky to safely teach. Maybe after the oath."

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"Or you c- never mind. Okay."

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"Or I could tie you up." He shakes his head. "Does the idea appeal or do you just like the faces I make?"

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"It's one of those things that can be more fun than it looks. And they're pretty great faces. Sorry, I was trying to stop."

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