Well, that didn't last long.

We have committed to a response.

But it didn't work last time!!

I fear you do not understand what 'committed to' means, here.

Fine, we'll close the Worldwound and kill Deskari again. And destroy any new technology on the mortal.

...it's empowered by a god? Already? Who did that?

BEHOLD THE MAGNIFICENCE OF THE ALMIGHTY.

Oooh, now they're sending in gods!

CHAOTIC NEUTRAL.

There are rules to be followed in My Creation, intruder.

Rules are for lesser beings.

We should squish Him, and commit to squishing any new god inserted into Our Creation.

Behold how I make it legible that MY MAGNIFICENCE CANNOT BE SQUISHED.

...yeah I've got nothing.

Oh no! Pharasma, don't be sad! You couldn't squish Rovagug either, but that didn't stop you from enjoying life existence!

I'm going to go SULK in my SPIRE for a while.

Worry not! I am only here to stop you from intervening.

And play a game with the mortals for amusement of beings you're better off not knowing about.

"Heal."

"DIE."

Gods, that was terrifying.

Ugh, my head. Where am I? I fell down? How did I survive?

I remember... Terendelev (!) and Hulrun (!!!) and next year's harvest festival (???) and a supergiant demon (?!) and - there's something inside my head -

What is happening to me?!

You are the Chosen One! Chosen as the oracle of PUN-PUN in the mortal world!

Yesss I'm a cleric now! Who's the goat? I'm the goat!

...wait, I'm still stuck underground! Boo.

Uh... cleric powers activate?

You'll need to be more specific than that!

(Well, you don't have to, but you might not like it if you activate your powers entirely without instructions.)

As you progress your adventure, you will unlock reveal more Powers of PUN-PUN within yourself! 

You start knowing four orisons. Choose them wisely!

...or well, in your case, you can just choose them.

All right!

This is a dark tunnel and I could use some light.

But Light is such a boring spell that I'll probably never need again! I want to leave room for actually good spells! Let's see how far I can get without light.

Picking, picking, picking my way over the rubble...

"Is someone there? We need help!"

A woman is trapped under rubble; another woman, in full plate with Iomedae's sword-and-sun, is trying to help her.

All right! I get to play the hero and rescue two women in distress without using any light! I am vindicated.

"Of course!" Uh... how do I actually do this... Wait, I don't actually need to figure this out, do I.

"Bit of a weird question, is there a cleric spell that would help here? I just got clericked and I haven't picked my spells yet."

"You'll only get spells when you pray tomorrow morning, but a channel would do wonders for my leg! After we get the rocks off it. D'you know which god's you are?"

"Pun-Pun!"

"Never heard of Him... but I'm from Garund. Anevia?"

"Don't know Him," she confirms. Which is bad news, because most new gods tend to be demon lords. There's no telling if he got the good or bad channel, either. "Do you have a holy symbol? ...and, ugh, can you two please get the rock off my leg first?"

"Oh shit I need a holy symbol! I've never heard of Pun-Pun either, I was hoping you could tell me about Him, what if I'm stuck without a symbol - oh sorry, your leg." What cleric orison would help here? Light, water, mending, stabilize, spark... aha!

"Guide Dance", you proudly proclaim.

Seelah feels an ineffable tug that guides her and Wulfric through the precise motions of lifting the rock without hurting Anevia's foot!

This involves skipping around her widdershins (holding the rock between them), with a little twirl at the end as they set it down.

(drumroll)

CURSE OF THE PUNSTER

Spells don't do what it says on the tin. Unless that would be funnier.

Aaaah mental drumroll!!!

...wow, that was a rush. I want to do that again! ...no, wait, have to heal a girl's foot before asking her to a dance.

Something feels wrong here but she doesn't want to argue with results! At least, not while injured and trapped underground with the cleric of an unknown deity.

"Thanks," she says, hobbling to her feet. "Seelah, have you got a lay on hands left?" She is not volunteering to be a baby's cleric channel test subject when she doesn't know for a fact if the god is any Good.

"No, sorry, I used them all in the fighting before I fell." She is a little embarrassed about not getting more daily lay on hands, because it means she's not a very splendid person.

"I'm a cleric, let me -"

- don't say it! It's way too soon for 'let me lay my hands on you'!

But! Even without channels, I can replace any spell with a cure, right? Which means I don't even need to know what the spell I'm replacing was. So I can still choose a good spell next time, when I actually need it and stuff!

"Cure! Light wounds!"

I got to lay a hand on her without even asking for permission! Being a cleric is so cool.

"Oooh, thank you, that's much better - ah!" She flinches from Seelah's torch.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah, just - dazzled for a moment? Got some sparks in my eyes." She is NOT alright, she is unable to look directly at the torch! This is extremely worrying and also she can't say so in front of the suspicious cleric, or even within sixty feet! 

She needs to separate Seelah from him somehow.

"Uh, introductions! I'm Seelah, a paladin of Iomedae. I came to Mendev a few months ago to help fight the demons and, well, after today I'm really glad I did! I haven't joined any local order yet but the Eagle Watch helped me get my bearings."

"Anevia Tirabade, of the Eagle Watch. A pleasure."

"Wulfric, cleric of Pun-Pun! Uh, I used to be regular guy, I work - worked - at the big bakery next to Abadar's. You buy our bread every Sunday morning, lady Tirabade!"

That bakery closed nearly four months ago. (Obviously she doesn't say this.) But she does think she recalls his face, now?

She smiles brightly. "Just Anevia, please! We're all comrades now. We need to find a way back up, or a way out of these caverns."

"I think I hear the fighting continuing... But I definitely can't climb up that crevice in my armor." Seelah worries at her lip.

"Are there cleric spells that could help?"

"You can't ask for spells until next morning." He had a cure already, so he's probably just lying about being a fresh cleric, but it is possible his god chose to give him spells right away since he was chosen in the middle of a fight. And it's possible the god foresaw which other spells would be useful. However -

"...if you have spells you should intuitively know what they are. Did you have the Cure prepared or did you burn some other spell for it, and if so did you sense what that spell was?"

"I don't want to think about what it might have been, I want to choose it when I need it! Uh, but I need a spell now, so can you tell me what spell would be good?"

That's not how clerics work! But demon lords sometimes empower witches and stranger things, so she can't rule out that he can, in fact, ask for a spell right now. In any case, she can tell him about some benign spells that aren't useful in combat.

"Ant Haul is what I'd recommend here. It would let Seelah carry her armor easily and maybe even carry one of us piggyback, if there was a safe route to climb and the only problem was strength and weight. Guidance can also help with climbing.... But I don't see any spots we can climb without someone letting down a rope. We should keep exploring, there may be a way up somewhere ahead."

"Oh. I was hoping for flying or something."

She smiles. "That's third circle."

"Never fear," Seelah says cheerfully, "I'm sure you'll make third circle!"

What lies down this crevice?

Ooof. Way to fumble in front of the ladies.

Trudge trudge trudge oh hey another pretty woman, uh, I mean adventuring companion!

...and a body? There's so much blood aaaaah?!

"I tried to heal him, but it was too late; the wounds he took from the fall were too grave."

Uh huh. The narrow, stabby wounds he took from the fall.

(Another round of introductions later)

But I wanted to practice Ant Haul...

Wait, what's that noise?

A trio of giant centipedes emerging from the darkness!

"Stay behind me!", cry Seelah and Wulfric at the same time.

Wait, what? He's not even armed! Or has any armor!

There's got to be a spell for dealing with vermin, right? Uh... Acid splash?

Very funny, but no. At least, not with your current abilities.

"I need a spell name!", I scream as Seelah runs in front of me.

"Try Inflict Wounds, the spirits demand your blood!"

The spirits what?! That sounds super scary, I'm not trying that!

Come on, come on, what spell do all clerics definitely have...

"Summon mobster!"

A tiefling with curly horns and a long tail appears! He neatly stabs two adjacent centipedes in the eyes before disappearing again.

What was that spell?!

Cool!

Cool.

Pretty cool, but you didn't leave any for me!

"That... didn't look like a regular summon," Anevia carefully says once the last centipede has been safely dispatched. Unless it was a demon and not a tiefling?

"It didn't? That means my summons are extra cool! Woohoo!" I pump my fist in the air victoriously.

"People usually summon animals. And outsiders, of course. Is it a rule that you can't summon people... I mean, mortals?"

"My teacher said I'll be able to summon giants once I'm strong enough."

Whatever Wulfric is, he's no cleric. Anevia isn't going to tell him as much, in case he already knows and is just pretending.

"But you shouldn't rush ahead like that! You can summon some distance away, right? Casters need to stay in the back line!" This is squarely within Seelah's domain of expertise.

Oh. Uh.

Can I still look cool if two out of three pretty women in the party are always running ahead of me and can't even see me? Probably not, right?

"I'll probably be out of spells soon, how can I fight after that?"

The dead man had a shortbow, can you use it?

....um. 

So you see, the thing is... I haven't exactly trained to be a cleric until this morning....

Unless the shortbow is Pun-Pun's favorite weapon! Then I bet I can learn to use it really fast!

"You're carrying a crossbow," Anevia observes neutrally.

"I am? Huh." I look down at my own hands (empty). Then I pat my back. There's... some kind of mechanism on a strap?

"Oh right! I remember now! Someone gave it to me just after the demons attacked! It was all a blur, honestly. ...I was still a baker, you see." The crossbow looks much more beginner-friendly than the shortbow! It's practically point-and-shoot! 

...wait, shooting from a distance doesn't solve my problem at all! 

Drat.

There is another group of giant centipedes in short order. Giant spiders, too.

I can shoot them. I can even kind of hit them sometimes.

...adventuring without spells is boring.

What did Pun-Pun say? I can reveal more powers inside myself! So what kind of powers do people have in these situations? Come on, I must have heard a thousand adventurer's tales! What does a mighty warrior do instead of plinking away with a crossbow every six seconds? 

"Fool Attack!"

Three clones of Wulfric (sans crossbow) appear. They pummel one of the spiders to death with their bare fists before disappearing just as abruptly.

REVELATION: PUNY POWER

Puns are not restricted to spells.

These weird summons are becoming ridiculous.

But useful!

"Fool attack! Fool attack!!"

What in the world is this guy...?

Maybe he's a demon or a cultist who's actually much more powerful than a first circle baby cleric and is just playing with them for kicks. That is - certainly something that has been known to happen, in complete disregard of any strategy or objectives you might expect the enemy to follow in the middle of a major attack, because the enemy is demon cultists.

Onwards! ...hey, do I hear voices up ahead?

"It's got to be here somewhere! I'm not leaving until we find it" - he whirls around at the sound of their approach. "Wenduag!" 

A hooded creature with spider legs growing out of its back steps out of the darkness. It points a bow at them.

"Aaaah spider demon! Fool attack!!!"

"Wait, we're not demons!"

"But the spirits demand your blood!!" An opening is all she needs.

"Wait, they're not Evil!" 

Even without Seelah's help, two archers can't stand up against a well-armored melee combatant ("you are today's sacrifice!!!") and a stream of melee summons.

Attacking people (who are only maybe demons) without warning would, in fact, be Evil. Letting your (very new, temporary, unofficial) party members do it while you stand by is probably also Evil? Even if it isn't, Seelah doesn't want to do it.

The problem is that she can't see a way to stop the fighting that doesn't risk someone being (justifiably) shot and killed by the super-tiefling archers.

Wulfric is easier to stop from casting but Camellia is more likely to kill someone in one hit -

Seelah runs forward and tries to interpose herself between Camellia and the tiefling she's fighting while screaming "I'm a paladin please stop please stop!" at the top of her lungs.

Did the demons just mind control Seelah? How can I tell what's going on?! I need a cleric spell! 

Detect Enchanted Paladin??

Not yet, sorry.

Uh...

"The tact demon!"

A woman appears.

....a woman appears in front of me!!!

She has - attributes I'll be able to describe later, like a longbow and wings and horns and blue hair and blue armor and blue eyes and, and and - 

She is the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. I can't speak in her presence. Or even think properly.

"Everyone, please - you don't need to fight each other, it's all a misunderstanding -"

She has a very convincing voice. And body language. Everything about her, really.

She has Detect Evil still up!

"Very strongly Evil!" she shouts, pivoting to place herself between Camellia and the new summon.

"That's a demon I can smell it!" Shoot, shoot, slide behind Lann preparing to melt away into the darkness.

"It's true - ow - but Desna sent me a vision - ow - please I'm not your enemy - fighting me is still better than fighting each other! - but we can talk it out -"

The arrows don't seem to be seriously inconveniencing her.

"Wulfric! Wulfric that's a succubus dismiss it!"

Wulfric.exe is not responding

I concentrate with all my might on the vision of pure beauty in front of me because she is a summon and she might disappear at any moment and that would be the most unfair fact in Creation. Please stay please stay please let me keep looking at you.

"I'm out of smites!" But she does her best to engage the demon in melee so it doesn't go after anyone else.

She catches Seelah's sword-hand with both of her own. All three archers are shooting at her now, but Seelah's positioning is making that awkward.

"I don't blame you for attacking me," she tells Seelah. "I know what I look like. What I - am. But - Desna sent me a vision. She said to tell you, not to fight each other. It's all right if you kill me. I'm only a summon -"

They might have three archers but only one of them has cold iron arrows!

"Stop shooting at her! She's not fighting back! Just - everyone please stop and, and let me think!"

...they're not stopping. They're not going to stop, shooting her, forever and ever while she tries to shield herself with her wings and they keep shooting and -

"Fool attack!!!" There's one of me for every archer in the fight, if only for a few seconds. I'm not trying to hit them, just to stop them from shooting.

"Wulfric! Listen to me! If she's your summon she has to do what you tell her! If you want to stop the fighting, command her to go away!"

That makes sense! She has to do anything I tell her to -

She has to do anything I tell her to -

Wulfric.exe has stopped responding

The regular non-cold-iron arrows (and Seelah's freed sword) aren't actually damaging her. They still hurt, of course, but that's easy enough to ignore. 

How strange. She didn't know she could be summoned from the Material. Maybe the Wound has become enough like the Abyss to allow it. That's... worrying.

She does, in fact, have to obey her summoner, it's not like being Called where you can fight it. Her summoner wants her to 1) make it clear who's a demon 2) make the nondemons fight any demons, and not each other 3) NOT GO AWAY. She has accomplished all three! So now she will just... sit down and cocoon herself in her wings, and wait for the summon to expire?

What a weirdly long duration summon.

She wishes she could warn them about the impending attack on Kenabres. But she has no reason to think they're anywhere near there, they may not even be on Golarion at all.

Also, this party contains a demon-summoning cleric and two people clearly twisted by Abyssal taint, and is prone to infighting and summoning *succubi* to calm spirits down, so they're presumably the wrong people to warn.

Guess who absolutely can and will leave, though!

"Lann! Let's go!"

"We can't abandon the sword to demon cultists!!!"

"We can't win, you idiot! Fuck your precious sword, I'm warning the village!"

Just because she works with demon cultists doesn't mean she can work with any arbitrary demon cultists. Where did this lot even come from?

Anyway, she's off.

"We're not demon cultusts, I swear! I'm a paladin of Iomedae! I'm, uh, very sorry for the misunderstanding, can we talk?"

Lann has lived on the surface long enough to know that's what all the demon cultists say.

Damn it, Wenduag is probably right. In any case he can't fight these four alone.

He runs after her.

"No, don't go!" They need to ask them how to get back up to the surface!

"No, don't go!" ...for that reason too, sure.

"Wulfric's enchanted" (or stunned or something), "help me carry him away from the demon!"

Will save to resist being led away: 100% made!

...what do you mean, that didn't ask for a Will save?

Oh no.

I will remember her in my dreams always

(A few minutes later:)

"Wulfric. Wulfric, are you with us." She slaps him. Gently.

"Here, let me try -"

I snap out of the incredible daydream with a start. My new cleric danger sense is tingling! ...no, that's my cheek stinging?

"I'm up! I'm up! What's going on?" We seem to be back in the previous cavern? Was it all a dream then?

"Wulfric. You summoned a succubus. That's incredibly dangerous! And Evil! You have to promise not to do it ever again!" Seelah is beginning to mentally assign Wulfric to a certain category.

"What? No!" I protest. "I cast a spell to detect demons! She must have been invisible before that and the spell revealed her!"

That's not how Detect spells work, at all.

Anevia doesn't have the Spellcraft to tell what it was Wulfric cast, but it can't have been that.

"...was she really a demon?" Can a demon be so - so radiantly beautiful and pure? Isn't beauty of Shelyn?

"Yes."

"Yes."

Is she the only one here who never saw a succubus before? It seems unfair.

"And the other two were clearly demons too."

My own spell wouldn't lie to me, would it?

But... this doesn't feel right. It doesn't feel right at all.

I have to get to the bottom of this.

"What now? There's no other way forward..."

"We could try to run past her... But a succubus could stop us if she wanted to. And I'm out of cold iron arrows." And not going into melee range of a succubus to pick them up.

"I volunteer to scout ahead!" Seelah says cheerfully, since she's obviously the right person to do this. "But, uh, it might enchant me. Wulfric, have you got Detect Magic?"

"Um. Maybe?" I don't really want to find out, I feel like there are cooler spells to have than that. "But what do we do then? I probably don't have Dispel Enchantment."

"...just run past very quickly and hope it keeps not attacking us? It's that or stay here."

The sounds of continued fighting drift down from above.

"If we get back we can help fight. It would be a very small difference -"

"- but it's my duty -"

"- so it's better to wait if that helps our chances. We can skip eating for one night, tomorrow morning Wulfric can prepare Ant Haul -"

"- I thought he didn't have a holy symbol?"

Tomorrow morning Camellia can prepare a climbing spell. It's self-only, though, and it might still be dangerous up there, and also they might survive after all and complain that she didn't go back with a rope... gah. 

"I'd rather try our luck tonight in the caverns."

"It's really unfair how Pun-Pun's revelation didn't include His holy symbol! How am I supposed to guess what it is? Just try every shape I can think of?"

"With a channel, yeah, if you have no other clues. But we don't know if you channel positive, so you can't try it right now."

"So I'll need to get a... wounded rat or something, and try channeling until I get it right? I guess that would work..." It sounds very... undignified. I don't even know how to channel, I've seen clerics do it and they don't say "Channel" unless it's really under their breath.

"Well, I'm not getting back up without a spell or a good rope. And I guess nobody will think to let down a rope until the fighting's over, and I want to help before that if I can."

"I don't want to just wait here. I don't think I was made a cleric just for that, I could have waited as a baker... wait, no, I healed your leg!" Remembering that cheers me up. "I bet I can handle whatever's in the caverns, too."

"I guess I'm outvoted. Alright, everyone, let's do our best. And be careful."

A short time later:

"I don't see the succubus," Seelah reports as she peeks past the corner into the semi-collapsed room.

"Maybe she's invisible again! I can -"

"NO," Anevia and Seelah say in unison.

But I really wanted to

It senses the touch of Heaven near after all those years! A paladin!

Shiiiiiine.

(It is, unfortunately, rather obscured by the rubble.)

"Let's not linger. We need to track down those - weird tieflings, or whatever they are."

"Hey, I think I see a light? Down there by the rubble."

"Detect -" mmmph!

"Don't cast it!" Anevia snaps, releasing Wulfric.

Rummage rummage. "It's a glowing sword," Seelah reports. "...and it's not Evil."

Oooh, a glowing sword! Could that be Pun-Pun's chosen weapon? If it is, maybe I'll learn to use it if I pick it up? Only one way to find out! 

(Even if it doesn't work out, I always wanted to hold a real magic sword. Can you blame me?)

I try to tug it out of the rubble. Magic weapons can't get scratched, right?

There once was an angel called Lariel, who came from Heaven to Mendev to aid the first crusaders!

Ooooh.

But he was betrayed and trapped, his comrades dying around him!

Aaaaaah?!

With his dying breath, the angel willed his power to a worthy successor... YOU!

Eeeeeeee!

Will you use it to succor the weak and wounded? Or to smite the evil and traitorous?

Yes! Yes, I will!!!

...

Will you use it to succor the weak and wounded? Or will you use it to smite the evil and traitorous?

...?

What kind of silly question is that?

Obviously I'll do both! That's what it means to be a hero!

... ... that is also Good.

Not Iomedae's kind of Good. But Good nonetheless.

Shiiiiiiine.

That feels so good!! ...wait, it disappeared?

Noooo my magic sword...

"What happened? Where'd it go?"

There's something... new? In my head, kind of? Like a spell, but different.

Magic sword? Is that you? Poke poke.

Shiiiiine.

"Oh cool, I can shine now! And pose dramatically and stuff! I really wanted the magic sword though." I slump a bit in dejection.

"You don't know how to use a sword." She hasn't actually asked, but this man has commoner written all over him.

"The light feels great though!" Seelah says encouragingly. "I think it's making us a little faster and stronger! Do you know what it is?"

"Oh yeah, I also got a vision! So there was an angel crusader once, and he left this sword for me to pick up so I can, uh, help the needy and strike evildoers - ohh! I bet that's why the sword won't come out, it only works against Evil, like your smites! I'll use it when we're fighting demons." I nod decisively.

Ah huh. And you saw this angel sword and rushed to pick it up and now it's conveniently gone. Mr. whatever-the-Abyss you actually are.

Anevia isn't very optimistic about her chances of making it back to the surface.

"The angel sword mist be empowered by the wielder's wisdom, befitting a cleric's weapon", Camellia drawls.

Anevia sends her a quelling look.

Which she is going to majestically ignore.

Oh yeah that sounds cool!

"Onward! I must test my blade against a demon!"

"...I'm still going in front."

Hey Asmodeus, didn't You commit to closing the Worldwound and so on?

We all did.

So why aren't you doing anything?

We committed to act the way we did last time.

Last time, it was Jerishall who closed the Worldwound.

I cannot act on my own without an authorizing ruling by Pharasma.

I am refusing to engage with this continuity and You can't make me.

After some more caverns, giant centipedes, backtracking, rockfalls, et cetera, the party emerges on the shore of a subterranean lake.

"We must be down at the river's level. If a branch of it feeds this lake, there may be a way out."

There is also a barely-dry landbridge to an island that has dimly visible structures on it, and moving people. The bridge is defended at its far end by a group of archers, hidden behind cover of conveniently-arranged rocks.

"Here they come."

"HEEEEY! WE COME IN PEACE! I AM A PALADIN OF IOMEDAE!"

(It's unclear how well they can hear her at this distance.)

An arrow thunks into the ground two feet ahead of Seelah. It speaks in language that is universal.

Drat it. "They're maybe good people. Or even neutral people but we need to ask them for directions, right? Is there a cleric spell that would help?"

Gods damn it! Stop playing with us! Even if there were a cleric spell that would help, if you didn't know about it YOU WOULD NOT HAVE IT PREPARED!!!

She doesn't want to have a showdown without talking to Seelah first (and, honestly, trying to run away in the night rather than fight Wulfric and his crazy demon summon) and if she did want one she certainly wouldn't want it here and now.

Anevia is in perfect control of her features.

"Sanctuary would let me go talk to them," Seelah suggests.

"Doesn't last long enough."

"Protection from arrows?"

"Not a cleric spell."

"Drat. Uh... so we need something clearly Good. Something they'll see from over there. What if..." I look at the lake. "What if I bless the water?"

Snort.

"Costs five pounds of silver for just a little flask."

"We don't need to pay the Abadarans, I can make it for free!"

"No, I mean -"

"Some things are best learned by trying," Camellia says sagely. Then ruins it by giggling again.

I kneel and touch the water. There's definitely something there. The potential of some spell I can cast, bringing Pun-Pun's wish - my wish - into the world.

I just... need to... concentrate on it hard enough...

"...and it takes a minute to cast," Anevia says resignedly.

Just... a little longer...

Wait, I need to call out the spell name! I should probably stretch that out too, just to be sure.

B-bbbbb.... Bbeeee...

"Be Less Water!"

The water in the lake disappears. Fish and other, less identifiable things are left flapping on the muddy bottom.

"Where did it go?!"

Wenduag is rapidly reevaluating her life choices!!!

"So. Um."

I really flubbed it this time, didn't I. Nobody's going to rely on me ever again! I promised them a lake full of holy water and now they don't even have a lake full of regular water! 

"Through a miracle of Pun-Pun, we can cross to the island without taking the defended bridge?" I try. But looking at their faces, I can see they're not buying it.

"...I'm so, so sorry."

"...wait, wait, I can fix this!" It's the most basic cleric ability there is! "Create - mmfff?!"

"Don't cast it," Anevia says grimly. Without removing her hand from Wulfric's mouth, this time.

An impromptu war council takes place on either side of the stand-off as they glare at each other across the exposed lakebed.

"We can't fight someone who can do that on a whim. We have to find out what they want here."

"We can't make deals with demon cultists, Wenduag! Think about what you're suggesting!"

"The tribe will die without the lake, Lann! The fish, the security -"

"We'll survive if we go to the surface! Kenabres has safe walls, the river has plenty of fish -"

"That's your answer to everything! We can't get to the surface, Lann, we can't pass the Maze even with just the hunters, and if we did the people there would probably just kill us all!"

"They wouldn't kill fellow crusaders! I'll convince Chief Sull this is the sign we've been waiting for - if we can find the angel sword -"

"Listen to me carefully, Wulfric. You have to trust me about this. Don't try to cast anything, just listen. You do trust me, right? Just nod."

I do trust Anevia! She's Eagle Watch, which is like being a paladin. And Seelah is a paladin. They must know what they're doing. And if they get it too wrong, Iomedae will tell them about it.

I nod, and relax. 

Anevia is really good at this. I mean the part where she's holding me so I can't move my hands or mouth at all but it's not actually painful. I didn't know you could do that! And she's warm and nice and pretty and I have Seelah to look at in front of me which is also nice and reassuring.

I relax into Anevia's embrace uh, grip.

"We don't know what you are -"

"MMMFF?! MM MM MOOMMFF!!"

"- I'm going to let you talk. But I need you to be very careful and not cast any spell or try to use any other magic or special abilities. Can you promise me that?"

I nod vigorously. Or, well, I try to, but it makes me even more aware of Anevia's hand over my mouth so it ends up being a weird kind of nod.

She removes her hand cautiously.

I take a deep breath. "I'm human. I'm definitely human! You know me, miss Anevia, I sell you bread every week!"