Oh.
Somehow she just. Didn't think about that.
And. Somehow, that makes her think, more, instead of flinching away from things.
About some things she's been flinching away from for a long, long time.
The thing that Sylar said to her as she left. It wasn't the kind of thing you say, if you're a good person, who's wrong about what's going on. The way he was feeling isn't the way you feel, if you're a good person, and there's some confused innocent in front of you protecting the guilty because she thinks they're good people.
And that law. It doesn't matter that its silly. Everyone still would have enforced it. She still would have been banished, her life destroyed. And as far as any of the people doing it were concerned, it wouldn't have been because she was hiding important information from the Inquisitors. It would have been because she fucked a dragon. When she actually thinks about it, when she thinks back to the minds of the guards she's read and stops making excuses, stops coming up with reasons why it doesn't count, or doesn't matter, how many of them would, say, turn the other way and let her into the city? And how many would feel that keeping the corrupting influence of someone like Christa out of their city was a good idea?
If there was a law that said you had to kill everyone who was left handed, and people had grown up thinking that was right and good, most of them wouldn't stop twice to think, before killing some poor person they saw who wrote with their left had, would they?
Aire would be killed just for being what she is, and nobody would bat an eye. Most would cheer. That's really not so different to the thing with left handed people, is it? It feels different, because it's a new idea, rather than something she grew up with. But it's not, really. And most people would just go along with it, and never even really notice that it didn't make sense.
That really isn't the kind of thing that can be true about a person at the same time that they're good, is it? Not if being good means anything at all.
And. And. All those times she saw people walk down the street, quietly thinking to themselves that feeding the poor was the highest calling, and weren't they such good people for thinking that, only to ignore the beggar they passed by. Those people weren't somehow confused. They just didn't actually care about the bit where poor people got food, only the bit where they got to feel the joy of thinking themselves a good person.
How could she tell if someone did care, if they were actually good?
They'd do something. Something besides talk, something that took effort. Not necessarily sacrifice. You can buy looking good with sacrifice. They'd do good things even when that didn't buy something for them.
If they grew up in a place with laws about killing the left-handed, they'd notice that was wrong.
How many people does Christa know that are like that?
Annabelle helped her, when she was new to Arcadia and the Collegiate. She didn't get much for that, and even made some enemies among the kind of people who hated Christa just because she was a telepath. She noticed that hating Christa for that was wrong. Someone saved her and Aire from that spy. And Christa guesses her doing what she did today probably counts, even if it did turn out to be a bad idea. Aire's been nice, but not really good, by the metric she's just thought up.
She gets to see people's thoughts. She's seen a bunch that did go and give money to beggars, and even seen the idea in the thoughts of a few that never seemed to feel the need to mention it.
There are good people. She knows that.
Just. A lot fewer than she thought there were, when she woke up this morning.