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"How did that happen, Beluchi?" the maths teacher asks.
"Martin."
"Hm?"
"You're not even pronouncing my first name right, and I like my middle name better. Martin."
"All right, Martin. How did you get this bruise?"
"Ran into a doorknob."
"What about that one?"
"Tripped. I have velcro shoes now though and Mum thinks that might help."
"What about the cut on your knee?"
"I tripped then too only I was holding scissors."
"Be- Martin, you realize this is a lot of injuries, right?"
"Yeah, I know."
"Is anyone at home hurting you, Martin?"
"...Huh?"
"Is your mum, or maybe an aunt or uncle or grandparent -"
"What?"
"Now, calm down and don't shout, it's -"
"She never! She would never! I fall! Ask the phys ed teacher, ask anybody, she never ever! Not even if I drive her barmy staying up late reading or not eating my spinach never don't you dare talk about my mum like that -"
"Martin -"
"And don't interrupt me!"
"Martin. I had to ask," says the maths teacher. "I'll talk to the phys ed teacher, okay? And the school nurse - do you fall at school, too?"
"Sure. I walk. I got the cut at school, I don't have to scissor anything at home and -"
"Okay."
"Don't interrupt me it's rude -"
"Martin, stop talking back, or I'll send you to the headmaster's office."
Martin snorts derisively. "Can I go? My mum never."
"Yes," sighs the teacher. "You can go have recess now."
Martin opens the door out of the office. That was probably a little louder than the teacher had originally intended; any stragglers still in the classroom and not on the playground may have heard the entire thing.
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well_known
well_known
"The penguins are cartoons, though, can they hand people things?"
pine_away
"Maybe only in their own dimension?" says Darian dubiously. "I don't know. I'm not a cartoon expert. Or a penguin expert."
pine_away
"Okay, you are now my penguin expert. Did it look like they could hold things?"
well_known
"Not in their wings, I think. Maybe in their beaks. They carry babies on their feet! Baby penguins, not baby people."
pine_away
"I think someone would find it worrying if they carried baby people around on their feet. Do the baby penguins find it strange? How do you walk when you're carrying a baby anything on your foot?" He looks down at a foot. "... I don't think my feet are big enough."
well_known
"Well, that's why they waddle, I guess. And their tummies are right down by their feet."
pine_away
Darian inspects his tummy.
"They must get help from the leprechauns," he says sagely.
"They must get help from the leprechauns," he says sagely.
pine_away
"Yeah, and that's why they help out. Because they have hands and the penguins don't. And they're friends and help each other out."
pine_away
"... Dance?" says Darien dubiously. "I don't know, you're the penguin expert, what do penguins do?"
well_known
"I don't know, they don't seem very useful. I'm not sure what they could do that leprechauns can't besides being in zoos, and that doesn't seem like a nice thing to do to the cartoon kind."
pine_away
"No, it doesn't." Darian thinks deeply on the possible uses of flippers. "... Maybe they use their flippers to fan the leprechauns? If they're hot or tired."
well_known
"But penguins are from really cold places. If the leprechauns are too hot the penguins are probably dying."
pine_away
"Oh! Oh, you're right, hm. That's not it, then. ... Should we ask a teacher?"
well_known
"Hey, now, I'm the penguin expert, I'll think of something."
pine_away
"Okay! What am I the expert in? I feel like I should be the expert in something."
pine_away
"I will be the expert in leprechauns," says Darian with utmost sincerity.
well_known
"Okay. What do leprechauns need? Penguins must do some of it."
pine_away
"They need to know where the rainbows are so they can find their gold, which is magic. Maybe the penguins look?"
well_known
"Maybe! I bet penguins would do just fine at finding things. They have eyes."
Here Ends This Thread