"--It's a meme. I--it did not even occur to me that I know more memes than you. I am so powerful right now, I know so many memes--"

"You gotta teach them to me!!!"

"No, no, this is great. I am going to draw this out so much. It's too late, Clay, I've gone mad with power."

"Tommyyyyyyyyy."

"Sorry, big C, this is just the price you have to pay for being friends with someone as incredibly cool as me."

Snort. "Right. The price of... what, learning memes slower?"

"Clay. Clay. You wouldn't understand."

"Clearly I don't!"

"Just wait until I write How to Sex 3. It'll explain everything. You read it and suddenly you're valedictorian, you understand physics and shit."

"You know, it's funny, because it--it actually won't explain sex. I'll read it and I'll actually, I'll actually know less about sex than I did before."

"All the girls will flock to you for your science skills and you'll have to be like, oh, sorry, I actually lost all of my knowledge of how to sex. I read this book, called how to sex, and it's--and they will say, that is just, that is so counterintuitive."

"Do you--do you want your gift today, or do you want to wait until tomorrow? Because I do--I do have it ready today. I know it's not Christmas yet."

"What the hell, Clay, I can't just--have a Christmas present on, on not Christmas."

"I think it's traditionally called Christmas Eve?"

"I know what Christmas Eve is, my point is that it's not Christmas."

"I'm fine with waiting. I just, I figured I'd ask."

"That's, like... actually almost nice."

"What! What do you mean almost nice?"

"I mean. You still did, like-- you're still a terrible person, just because you're trying to give me gifts and shit-- like, you're still not letting me talk to any of my friends."

"What? Tommy, what do you mean I'm not letting you talk to any of your friends? I'm your friend, aren't I?"

Uh-huh. Suuuuuuuuure.

"...............Yeah, I guess you are," he says, instead of that, because he doesn't want to pick that fight right now.

"We should trade homework, I can do the stuff that having more mana helps with and you can do the, y'know, you can do the boring stuff."

This sucks incredibly much. Unfortunately, it's also probably a good idea. At least doing boring shit builds mana?

And a few hours later:

"--Since when did you have mana storage? What?"

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. Tommy shoves the little crystal into his pocket. "Iiiiiii don't know what you're talking about. Me? Have mana storage? Noooo. Never."