"Hey, you okay?" says the rider, taking off her helmet. "There usually aren't hitchhikers around here, especially at this time of night."

"I am abundantly bewildered but not in danger or distress."

"Well, all right. What's bewildering you?"

"This time a week ago I was in a different solar system and, I am beginning to suspect, a different century."

".... Huh. Well, it's 2016. What solar system were you in?"

"2995, passing through Escobar."

"Haven't heard of it, sorry. Do you want a ride to town? It's kind of a long walk."

"That would be helpful."

"Sure, I've got a spare helmet with me, and you can fit on my bike. Do you need a place to stay, too? I'm spare on spaceships, sorry, but I might be able to secure you a couch."

"That would also be helpful, thank you."

"No problem."

Helmet! Bike.

"So how long have you been a vampire?"

"Four days."

"Sire was a bastard?"

"He had some sort of cult and they summoned me as an offering and when I killed substantial numbers of them despite being temporarily deprived of my senses he decided that instead of eating me he would prefer to make me his immortal lover. He turned me. We fought. I won. I discovered by experimentation how to kill him."

"Wow, that's. A really shitty way to get a sacrifice. Congrats on the killing, sounds like they deserved it. But the entire experience sounds unpleasant, I'm sorry you got dragged into it."

"Thank you," he says. "It's been... novel."

Snort.

"That's a word for it, yeah. And no idea how to get home, I'm guessing?"

"Not the faintest. Plausibly impossible. Not sure I care."

"Why's that?"

"Long story."

"Fair enough." Pause. "I haven't had a home in a while, personally, after I turned I've been kind of - bouncing around a bit of everywhere. Not settling down anywhere in particular."

"I've been in a similar state these last few years. If home is an emotional state, I have never personally experienced it."

"Hey, you have eternity now. There's time."

"Do I?"

"Well, there's the three S's for a vampire to avoid. Sunlight, stakes, and the Slayer. And then anything holy, which I suppose could be - spiritual? Salvation? Hm. Whatever. Holy water, crosses, certain blessed objects - those hurt and will burn you, but probably not actually kill you unless very well aimed. And fire can kill you if it's not put out in time. Oh, and beheading, but I'm guessing that was the one you figured out? Otherwise, enjoy your immortality."