She laughs and cries and hiccups a bit. "I missed you so much."

He holds her. Doesn't say anything for a long time. Right now he feels like he never ever ever wants to let go. 

"- How did Ma'ar take it?" he asks finally, softly. "Learning about me - that he is me...? I am trying to better model his state - I will ask him too, of course, but I think some aspects are more easily seen from the outside." 

"He was mostly upset that he could've destroyed the world like that."

"Understandable. I was - very upset about it, for a long time. Though it took decades to even piece together what had happened, exactly." 

"Should've asked you more questions. I didn't know any details except that Urtho's weapons were used, and it was during the war, and that he started the war..."

"Honestly, I barely knew more details than that myself until Vanyel and the others found Urtho's records. None of my records survived - what used to be the capital of Predain is now at the bottom of a very large lake, in my Velgarth. A suspiciously crater-shaped one." 

"I'm so sorry. You must've been - so sad, and so alone -"

"I was not even certain whether I had started the war or Urtho had. I suspected, just from - knowing myself, and remembering how I felt about him, but - I did not know for sure until so recently..."

Hug. "Did you find the you - in the Velgarth you found that's post-catalysm but a thousand years before now -"

"I did not try that hard to look for him, no. It would have been nontrivial - I cannot easily use my own magic to locate a me from another world, he would have his own Void-shelter and such, not linked to my one. I am fairly sure he is there, though, there are - signs, of things that I know I built - the Eastern Empire was there." 

Pause. "I intend to go back, later. I left a message for him, in - the sort of place where I would look for my past self's notes." 

"We're just gonna have an army of them, aren't we, eventually. Maybe that one can help Ma'ar fix Predain, since you'll be busy here."

"That is a promising idea! I think a young me would do much better on it with help, and - Urtho is very Good, and skilled in many ways, but not really qualified to advise on that particular issue."  

"I got that sense. It was kind of frustrating. I thought I could probably help him, and you definitely could, but we're going to be busy here - I guess that one of you might be busy too, but his world's going to be harder to work in because it has hostile gods..."

Sigh. "That is the other implication of there being so many worlds, right. More people, more resources, but - also more problems. The same ones repeated, and probably new and exciting ones too." 

"And new magic! Probably kinds that combine even more usefully than ours do."

"Probably!" He squeezes her. "...And perhaps time-sensitive situations - it would have done much less good if you had arrived twenty years later - but...I still think it can wait. I want to feel safe, with you, just for a little while." 

"I want to be yours. I want to be here and belong to you and know that you will search a thousand worlds -"

"You are mine, and I am yours, and trust me, I searched considerably more than a thousand of them - most of them are not that interesting at a brief glance - I suppose technically I made Vanyel and Urtho do most of the searching, since Vanyel can make diamonds just fine in the Void-vessel, and Urtho got another cleric level from Nethys for figuring it out so was very excited to do more..." 

She is holding him tightly enough to hurt. "Still kinda mad at Nefreti."

"I am rather irritated with her myself, though - less than I was because it does not seem like there is much point, I went and shouted at her several times - Aroden went and shouted at her several times - I think Iomedae may have had a talk with Nethys too, and none of it made any difference, she just looked entertained." 

"Well, I don't wish she hadn't done it, but really."

"It may have had good results, in the end, but it scared me so much, and it was so rude. ...Also it made me miss the birth of my child, I will probably never forgive her for that." He brushes a hand gently over Carissa's belly. "...How terrible was it?" 

Lean. "I wish you'd been there. It wasn't, really, all that horrible, but. I wish you'd been there. Men aren't, even, usually, but -"

"I would have wanted to be there. I am sure it is not any worse than things I have already seen, and if I were not there I would just be more stressed about it, not less - that is in fact what happened..." He squeezes her more tightly. 

"That's what Ma'ar said. He was there. Kind of - like having you there, except not entirely - I wish I'd thought of the descendents-spell, then I could've been thinking of it as - helping you find me - oh, you know what I bet I can do now, I bet I can heal myself." She channels energy; it works fine. "- ha."