<Then it seems like a reasonable step. 

- also I should not go home to my family if I am still needed for the war. Once I am recovered I will be a capable soldier, and there is always need of those.>

Melody does not say 'that's stupid', only thinks it. :Of course. I understand. I'll tell Matirin. I think probably you can at least see them for, like, a week? It helps a lot that Leareth can Gate directly to the Andalite homeworld, so it's not months of travel in hyperspace, just 'Leareth is too tired to do anything else for six candlemarks now'.:

<Oh> He brightens slightly. <That does help.>

:Matirin was so pleased about it! It's some sort of complicated routing through other planes to cut the equivalent distance, that I can't follow at all, and for some reason he has to do it out from orbit around Saturn. But in the process they made a planar mapping computer program that can figure out routes for him, so any future ones should be a lot easier to research. He had to do it much more by guesswork when trying to get from Velgarth to Earth initially: Mostly she knows this because Vanyel spent a candlemark excitedly telling her. Leareth is genuinely a very impressive person. 

<If Matirin thinks it wise I would certainly enjoy seeing them.>

:I'll discuss it with him. Anyway. We should figure out how you can practice not freezing when you're startled or distressed. ...Unfortunately, this probably means deliberately putting you in startling situations a few times. There are some Mindhealing things I can do to help with the freeze response, and with not losing track of your body, but you also just need more exposure to it, I think: 

<That makes sense to me.>

:What are some examples of situations you've found startling or distressing recently?: 

<People approaching me unexpectedly because I was not keeping good track of my surroundings. People getting - suddenly hostile or angry. Trying to move and not being able to - say, because my foot is stuck, or I'm dreaming.>

Nod. :...Have people sometimes been getting suddenly hostile or angry with you?: Melody is now sort of tempted to find them and punch them, although this almost certainly wouldn't help. 

<I asked some questions about the gods and I think it bothered Taver. Then I stopped.>

:Oh. Right: Melody takes a deep breath, lets it out. :I'm sorry about that. There's - some context, about Companions, they can't help it, they just - can't have certain thoughts, it seems like, particularly ones about fighting gods, but they seem to get uneasy around just asking questions about gods too: 

Her fingers tighten into a fist around a handful of her robes. She's so goddamned furious at the Star-Eyed Goddess, still, messing with HER patient, and there's nowhere for that anger to go so it's just sitting there simmering. 

<Also now you are suddenly angry> Alloran says dryly. He doesn't seem upset.

:I'm sorry: Melody takes a slow breath, lets it out, and is calm again. :I just - have some grievances with the gods, but that's a digression. You all right? You don't seem terribly startled: 

<I am not startled. I don't know how to predict it.>

:Well, I can imagine that you think I'm unlikely to hurt you even if I do get angry sometimes. Also I wasn't angry with you, which probably shows: She pauses, thinking. :Oh, by the way, did you ever manage to find something that helps you feel calmer when you think about it? I wasn't able to do a very good calming-loop before: 

<Playing with the foals makes me feel calmer.>

Nod. :Then maybe to start I can do a better calming-loop: 

It's going to be a lot easier to work with his mind now, too. She opens her Sight fully, examining the tapestry for changes since the last time, and mentally comparing it to the first time she met him. 

It looks significantly healthier. Still very sparse in many parts, but the parts that correspond to movement and to - planning, wanting things, trying to do them - are firming up really nicely. They look different than they do in most people. More deliberate, more systematic, nothing natural to them. But they're not practically gone anymore.

:All right, I need you to think as vividly as you can about an upsetting thing - sorry - and then, when I say to, think about a calming thing, like playing with the foals. While you do that I'm going to use Mindhealing to make that pattern very sticky and memorable, so it'll be more accessible later even if you're very overwhelmed. Make sense?: 

<Yes.>

He thinks about Visser Three somehow escaping justice for his crimes. 

She watches intently, gives it fifteen or twenty seconds to be solidly anchored on the 'distress' pattern, then: :All right, think about the calming thing now: 

And as soon as she sees it shift at all, she dives in on exactly those threads, and pushes with her Gift, cementing that particular pattern, upset-to-calm, ten times deeper than it reasonably ought to be from trying it once. (Alloran will notice substantially more of the visual effects this time, but it doesn't last long.) 

He thinks about the foals and notices the visual effects and shivers. 

<Have you finished your work?>

:I think so. Sorry, I know the side effects are unpleasant: She backs off. :All right, hmm, maybe go run around for a minute or something, so your mind is on other things. Then I need you to try to get upset about a different thing - I'm sorry - and see if you can use that handle to calm yourself down after: 

He goes off to run around. He comes back a minute later.