This is not Margaret's parents' kitchen, this is a bar.
". . . I could not possibly have done this on accident."
This is not Margaret's parents' kitchen, this is a bar.
". . . I could not possibly have done this on accident."
It's conventional to refer to them as "the Landlords" but I can shed no further light on the matter.
"So you're, what, trapped in here with us too? Where are you, why are you communicating by napkin?"
"Oh! Sorry, I didn't realize people came in bar. Did you know people could be bars, Ismat? Also, uh, bar, how long has this place existed? Have other people come in here?"
"I don't know of anybody making a habit of turning people into bars but it's not the strangest thing I ever heard."
There's usually someone around, but I'm afraid I have very little idea how old I am, I simply can't remember back that far.
That sounds pretty unnerving for the bar too. "So, uh, I still have no idea where Osirion is."
Ugh, American schools are really living down to the stereotype today. "Where is that relative to North America?"
"Okay, if it weren't for how you're speaking English I'd be wondering if you were even from Earth."
"Oh, man, translation magic? I wish I had found out that was a thing sooner! And not like this."
"Wow, there just keep being more things in heaven and earth. What's your world like? We both have humans and magic items, at least."
"Axis, not Heaven or Earth. Axis is the Lawful Neutral Outer Plane. Uh, humans, magic items... deserts? Elves? Falafel?"
"It was a literary reference; is there an actual universe called Heaven? We have deserts and falafel but not elves as far as I know. Uh, pegasi, computers, universities, baseball? And what does it mean for a plane to be Lawful Neutral?"
"There's a Heaven - Lawful Good outer plane - and an Earth, that's one of the Elementals. We have pegasi and universities. Uh, everybody in the plane is - no, that's not true, some people in Axis aren't Lawful Neutral, but that's the way to bet. The natives all are, and the dead people, and most of the gods."
"We don't have gods, at least where anyone can see them. And our dead people don't, uh, do stuff. They're just dead."
"Nobody eats them, they just--stop existing. The bodies get buried, usually. It's really good that people in your world can keep living after they die; I wish we had that."
"How do you mean they just stop existing, what's happening to their souls - I could probably make a soul-trapping thing so somebody could take your soul somewhere appropriate to let it out before it dissolved or whatever, I never have and it'd be hard but I'm good at what I do -"